Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #563: Season premieres!

[LeadHead]

Hello everyone! Sorry for circumstances keeping me away from the contests. Things seem to be stabilizing. Thank you for your well wishes.

Here's the new contest, the intent will be to have A LOT of winners at the start of the next contest. (on Monday, 9/3)

In the meantime, new contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: What is it Mister Data?

Data: A viewscreen, but that's not important right now.

Gowron: No more naps during council meetings!

Data: Is this USB compatible?

Troi: May I request to not have nearly the entire male portion of the senior staff in the room for this meeting?

Clemens: The props department did a great job on that didn't they?

 

[Mr Soak]

An oversight during the Design of Galaxy-class ships meant no theatre, so movie night was held on the bridge.

Worf: There are NO lights! What is this, Discovery?

Data’s latest atempt at an anti-fap device.

Picard: I hereby convene this meeting to make a decision on season finale-premiere two-parters to boost ratings.

Twain: You’re as anachronistic as that little box over there that allows millions of people to watch us.

 

[Finn]

Glad to see things are settling down, Leadhead. Welcome back

Second Officer's Log: I learned not to ask about how Humans experience awkward moments, when Riker forgot to put the video on mute earlier today...."

Worf: He has no honor. A warrior shouldn't throw away good prune juice

Picard: I could go for some Earl Grey....

 

[IMC Headquarters]

DATA: Earl Grey I presume? My name is Data.

PULASKI: Yes it's true. I am Leonard McCoy. But I became a woman when I regenerated.

MARK TWAIN: All good things arrive unto them that wait--and don't die in the meantime.

PICARD: Mister Data? Deactivate your flatulence chip.

GOWRON: Excellent! Bring me a straw.

 

[IMC Headquarters]

GOWRON: So shall all fall who belong to the House of Cards...

 

[Herbert]

Worf: Reduced lighting budgets are without honor!

 

[IMC Headquarters]

DATA: I am returning this Echo at earliest convenience. I do not recall ordering a Borg.

 

[Herbert]

Data: I have your hand. You are no longer master of your domain

 

[IMC Headquarters]

PULASKI: All my medical scans have confirmed that Counsellor Troi's hair is composed entirely of tribbles.

 

[IMC Headquarters]

GOWRON: I need another volunteer to go into the basement to replace the lighting fuse. And I will hear no more stories of...spiders...

 

[Herbert]

Locutus: I ... am breaking up ... with you!
Data: You can't break up with me. I've got hand.
Locutus: And you're gonna need it.

 

[IMC Headquarters]

MARK TWAIN: You will find that the sensitivity of this device will benefit from a graphene buffer printed onto the primary lithium wafer. What? You think you're the only time-travelers in the room? Time is like the Mississippi - it's always changing, and you'd better know how the hell to spell it properly.

 

[Qonundrum]

The crew watched in sheer disbelief as the events of "The Force Awakens" on the big screen. At least Riker couldn't make up his mind if he wanted to sleep or laugh through it.

Worf: "I told him not to drink the water."

Data: "This will come in handy some day."
Picard: "You stole my egg whisk."
Troi: "I sense the Captain is wanting to tell you that isn't funny but he's not in the mood right now."

 

[IMC Headquarters]

GOWRON: Are there no more volunteers to go into the basement? Kahless will light the way...
KLINGON LIEUTENANT: Then how come he keeps blowing our fuses?

 

[IMC Headquarters]

MARK TWAIN: I congratulate you, Mister Data, on your discovery of the lie detector. No real gentleman will tell the naked truth in the presence of ladies, I tell you...

 

[TribbleFeeder]

Picard: I believe the neon St. Paulie Girl sign might be adding more illumination than necessary on the bridge, Number 1.


Gowron: Who’s bat’leth is stuck in the circuit box again?! How many times must we discuss no nga'chuq in the electrical conduit?!


Data: Captain, by the end of this episode you will be able to do The Robot with total precision.


Troi: Lt. Riker, your decision to seat me all the way down here suggests you’re feeling an emotion that you don’t want me to sense.
Riker: That wouldn’t be a problem if you just wore a normal uniform like the rest of us.

 

[IMC Headquarters]

MARK TWAIN: It takes a thousand men to invent a telegraph, or a steam engine, or a phonograph, or a photograph, or a telephone or any other important thing - and the last man gets the credit and we forget the others.

 

[Captain Crow]

[Riker starts bawling]

[Picard grabs Riker's hand to comfort him]

Riker: I've seen this film hundreds of times, but the part where Old Yeller gets put down still gets me.

 

[Leviathan]

Data: Need a hand?