Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #555: Mommy!

[Qonundrum]

Wesley: "Mom, where do babies come from?"
Bev: "They taught everyone in kindergarten to ensure everyone can learn calculus by first grade. How can you of all people not remember?"

Lwaxana: "Deanna, where do babies come from?"

Wesley: "Sir, where do babies come from?"
Bev: "Shut up Wesley, don't you ever speak to your 'father' about that ever again!"

Worf: "I don't look like you. Where do babies come from?"
Worf's stepmother: "Ancestry.com. Remember, it's not a dating site."

Wesley: "Mommy, where do babies come from?"
Bev (thinking): "Do I tell him now?"
Riker(thinking): "She'd better not tell him I'm the real father."
Bev: "Wes, better sit down for this. The truth is, Q is all our father."

 

[Mutai Sho-Rin]

Sorry for the Stickyswitch delay, I’ve been off the grid for a few days.

 

[Tenacity]

Worf: I'm so happy you came alone mother, I enjoy our time together so much more without the boring presence of father.
Mom: Worf dear ...
Worf: He's right behind me isn't he?

Lwaxana: "Deanna, where do babies come from?"

Deanna: Well, first a glowing ball of light visits you in the middle of the night, Then ...

 

[JirinPanthosa]

BEVERLY: Aww, that's so cute, did you do that all by yourself?
WESLEY: It's a level 3 diagnostic of the plasma induction coils.
BEVERLY: So adorable. I'm going to put it up on the fridge!

MR HOMN: The owls are not what they seem.
LWAXANA: ...What?!
MR HOMN: Sorry, got the scripts mixed up.

WESLEY: So, I was thinking since I missed my ship to the academy you'd give me a field commission of full ensign.
PICARD: Absolutely not.
BEVERLY: (Casually lifts up skirt)
PICARD: Now, maybe this is something to consider.

WORF: Wait, you mean I never actually had a pet targ?
MRS ROSHENKO: It was a dog in a warthog costume.

WESLEY: Mom, why is the Commander practicing his fashion poses?
BEVERLY: I told him he could be a model to shut him up.

 

[LeadHead]

Sorry for the Stickyswitch delay, I’ve been off the grid for a few days.

I was late in starting the contest and never sent you a notification. I think I owe the apologies.

 

[Qonundrum]

Wesley: "Mom, are you okay?"
Bev: "Yes, I am. Wil and I just read the following two scripts and I now worry we signed up for the wrong show."
Riker (thinking): "Yeah, that those two really make me sick."

 

[inflatabledalek]

Dr Crusher: So Riker thrusts his crotch at you from about where my face is?

Wesley: No, it's actually closer than that.

Deanna: Mother I think you ought to know that...

ARGHHH!

Mr. Homm, you scared the life out of me. Don't Lurch up out of nowhere like that.

Picard: Look, getting a friend killed on duty through negligence will never harm your career. Just ask your dad.

Worf: Amazing how many people thought Star Trek treating our homeland of Russia as still having places with names like Leningrad was a failure to predict the future rather than getting the current Putin Cold War tribute act bang on.

Commader's Personal Log: The Doctor isn't impressed by my story of me just asking for an apple and it appearing from thin air, even though this is clearly impossible and beyond anything we can do.

 

[Tenacity]

Wesley: Mom, the new first officer is here.
Riker: "How YOU doing?

 

[Finn]

Beverly: Try don't get the LCARS all smudgy. I can see your fingerprints all over.

Wesley: They aren't mine. They are Data's. One of his experiments in his quest for understanding humanity.

 

[Qonundrum]

Wesley brought his favorite friends onto a roller coaster... yet nobody told him to shut up.

 

[Nerys Myk]

BEV(thinking): Is this my personal massager?

 

[Nerys Myk]

BEV: Now push the red button...
WES" Mom! I can do it myself!

 

[Herbert]

Deanna: <thinking> hmm, that looks like O'Brien's spider and it's about to drop on mom's head. This should be good. Snicker!
L'waxana: <thinking> I heard that Little One.
Deanna: Damn telepaths

 

[Herbert]

BEV: Now push the red button...

WES: Not the red one! Don't ever push the red one!

 

[Finn]

PIcard: I like the Constitution Class model. I didn't realize you were a fan.

Wesley: Actually it was a gift from Riker for my entry at the Academy. He thinks it's the NX-01

Picard: Merde!

 

[Catarina]

Lwaxana: You should know better than to roll your eyes at me, little one. I have eyes on the back of my head, a mirror, and I am the daughter of the fifth house...
Deanna: shut up, mother.

 

[Jedman67]

BEVERLY: Now, where would you be without me, Wes?
WESLEY: Well, I thought I had @LeadHead before he disappeared!

PICARD: Mr. Crusher, I know all about imaginary friends. The thing is, they are *imaginary*. Not real.
WESLEY: I swear captain, @LeadHead *is* real!!
CRUSHER: He's lying, Jean Luc.

LWAXANA: Deanna, I know the perfect young man for you - and you *will* give him a chance!
TROI: Mother! Not @LeadHead again!

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Lwaxana: You should know better than to roll your eyes at me, little one. I have eyes on the back of my head, a mirror, and I am the daughter of the fifth house...
Deanna: shut up, mother.

or I promise, next time I'll say it with you.

 

[LeadHead]

Sorry folks, May is massively busy for me. I’ll start a new contest this weekend.

 

[Leviathan]

Beverly: When you're old enough you'll inherit your great grandmothers candle...