Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #520: Wait, there's other people aboard?

[Qonundrum]

Red shirt: "Yum, pink kool-aid and Tribble eggs! How'd you get them?"
Blue shirt: "Don't ask. Command grades never understand medical sciency stuff."
Gold shirt 1: "Are they fresh or did they come out of a replicator?"
Gold shirt 2: "Who cares, as long as they taste like licorice, that's all I care about!"

Geordi: "Come here and pull my finger."
Vulcan: "It is illogical to point fingers in a dramatic gesture designed to get me to pull your appendage in order to induce a sound frequently associated with a function from the latter stages produced by a digestive system."

Crewmember: "Captain, how does my hair look?"
Picard: "Like you spent too much time sticking your nose in the light socket after depleting Earth's ozone layer again."

Troi: "Can't you wait for me to leave before you share notes?"
Worf: That was in an alternate timeline that didn't happen."
Troi: "Oops, Guinan told me to keep that a secret."
Riker: "Alternate timeline? How can we make it real? And if so, can I join in?"

 

[tharpdevenport]

Beverly: "I think I found your problem. Have you been making out with any sparkly vampires lately?"

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

Picard: "A word of advice, Ensign. You really need to work on your stealth skills. Either that, or I'm inexplicably being trailed by a herd of elephants."

 

[Nerys Myk]

CRUSHER: As I said, there might be some slight bruising.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Picard: "Ah, I'm glad you're here, Ensign; an intruder alert has just been issued and I need you to stand in front of me since I'm in red."

 

[f14peter]

\

TAURIK: "I believe I could be of assistance to you Commander, I will adjust th--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!! Don't touch that Taurik!"

TAURIK: "But it would be more efficien--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!!"

TAURIK: "The two of us coul--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!! I said don't touch that!"

TAURIK: "If I wer--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!!"

TAURIK: "How abo--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!!"

TAURIK: "But--"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!!"

LAFORGE: "PPSSSHHHT!!!!!! ... ... ... that was a pre-emptive PPSSSHHHT! And I have whole bag of PPSSSHHHT with your name on it!"

 

[Tenacity]

Worf realized to his dishonor that his tale of heroic adventure had caused LaForge and Crusher to fall asleep, and Troi wasn't far behind.

 

[Smellincoffee]

Thanks for the win!

Sam: Hey, guys, have you ever noticed that junior crewmembers disproportionately perish on away missions, especially if a senior crewman is on the away team? Whatup with that?
Taurik: Actually, compared to other capital ships, the Enterprise-D's fatality records are quite low.
Sito: Well, that's a relief.

Crusher: Aw. There goes my "Days Since this Department Has Experienced a Mysterious Fatality" record.

LaForge: Taurik! I knew I recognized you. Winner of the "We've Got a Coolant Leak!" Shoulder Roll competition, Junior Shipman division!

Sito: Captain! I'm here about the hazardous assignment.
Picard: Excellent. Ambassador Troi will be here within two hours. She needs an aide.

Worf: The ensigns call you "Stinknuts", sir.
Riker: Remind me of that when crew evals come around.

 

[inflatabledalek]

Lavelle: I tell you, the one real reason I want this promotion is once you're no longer a junior officer, you get the two piece uniform!

Sito: If you're a man.

Geordi: The name change doesn't fool me! I won't have minor Voyager characters in my engine room!

McFadden: Ah, Mr Braga... Remember that time you wrote a film where the EMH had more lines than me? Well, paybacks a bitch.

Picard: Let me guess, you're going to need to Sito down after all this exercise?

Worf: Do you have Mr. Bun the Baker?

 

[LeadHead]

New Contest is up!