TNG Caption This! 290: Security Concerns...

[ThankQ]

"Worf to Picard: Target is having a sale on Totes, but you have to bring the coupon from the cicular."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Starfleet is curious about why, shortly after assimilating me, the Borg suddenly came up with the idea of a Borg queen. Have you any theories on that, Number One?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Riker, stop checking your reflection on my head!!!!

 

[ThankQ]

Photobombs... of the FUTURE!

 

[Triskelion]

Data: You have removed me from my protective case. I will not be as valuable.

 

[Nerys Myk]

GEORDIE: Back off, I'm texting with my girlfriend!

PICARD: We know, we're waiting to see if she's real.

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: Report, Mr. La Forge.

La Forge: Jar Jar Binks has started a new caption contest in the Enterprise forum!

Picard: Transmit the Link immediately!

 

[Triskelion]

Worf to bridge, The Captain's shipment of Vulcan marital aids has arrived.

Shall I arrange a wedding reception, Lieutenant Worf?

Yes, Data. Yes you should.

Crewman: Where should we dump this junk, Chief?
O'Brien: Junk? This is a genuine extraterrestrial object d'art on eBay.
Crewman: Come to think of it this would go great over my sofa.
O'Brien: Bidding starts at midnight.

 

[Nerys Myk]

CREWMAN: When you said "jigsaw puzzle", I was expecting something a little smaller.

 

[Isis]

LeadHead, TFTW.

When the Borg collective fell on difficult economic times, the carpet cleaning service opened by some of them was not well received.

 

[Triskelion]

Picard: Number One, the entire ship is being flooded with anasthazine gas. Would you know anything about that?

Riker: No?

<Entire crew passes out; Data looks over shoulder at Science II station>

LaForge: All right, I've erased the body from the neck down.

Riker: Now take the body from Ro's service record.

Ro: No! Computer, paste the Crusher boy's body on this profile!

MacDuff: Nice! Computer, add feety pajamas and a gorch breakout!

Picard: Computer, update Starfleet service record authorization Picard alpha three. Add level one encrypted security protocol against any future adjustments or tampering.

Worf: What are you all doing?

Geordi <Closes screen>: All systems nominal, sir.

 

[T'Girl]

GEORDIE: Back off, I'm texting with my girlfriend!

Ro: Why is the address listed as "Holodeck Two?"

 

[Isis]

Maitre D' (OS): "Sorry, there's no reservation for 6 under the name Jean-Luc Picard."

Picard: "Hmm. Young Mr. Crusher assured me he made the reservations. I thought I told him to make the reservation under my name, but maybe he missed that. Do you have any parties of 6 at all?"

Maitre D' (OS): "Let's see. We do have one—an A. Nalfisher. Is that your group?"

Picard: "On second thought, I seem to be mistaken. We decided to eat in after all. Sorry to trouble you."

Geordi (to self): "That Wesley, he always has to get so gross. I told him we should have gone with Ivana B. Luft."

Even in the 24th Century, it took forever to get the photocopier repair person on site.

 

[Bones_McCoy21]

Borg: We are the Knights Who Say Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptangya Ziiinnggggggg Ni!

 

[Triskelion]

Borg: Your multiple techniques will be added to our own.

 

[Isis]

Picard: "Numbah One, I have to say that's one of your less impressive poses."

Riker: "Pose? This is a Charley Horse, I'm stuck like this, and you'd better page Dr. Crusher immediately!"

 

[Isis]

Borg drone: "We'll thank you to clean up after the feline for whom you have assumed care."

Data (to self): "I knew I should not have given Spot that plomeek."

 

[Isis]

O'Brien: "Well, we've answered an age-old question."

<brief pause>

O'Brien: "Mugatus are not toilet trainable."

 

[Isis]

Picard: "So according to this newscast, the State of Florida has finally determined that Barack Obama carried the state in the 2012 U.S. presidential election."

Riker: "And it took only a little over 300 years. They must be slipping."

 

[Balrog]

Borg on Data's right: We are The Borg. Resistance is futile. But go ahead - Resist! C'mon! Just try it, pal!

Borg on Data's left: Give it a rest already, 2 of 3. Geez...