TNG Caption This #178: Say hello to Season 4

[LeadHead]

Good Saturday to everyone! Time for a new TNG Caption Contest! But first lets get to our winners from our last round.

First up, for properly honoring the Trek BBS and those who manage to post in threads doomed from the start, our winner is:

LaForge: "In before the lock!"

For showing that Q can do nice things for people, our winner is:

Q's birthday gift for Jean-Luc Picard: a full head of hair and a shiny coat.

For showing us that times change for which uniform type marks you for death, our winner is:

"And this is where Jimmy and Sarah tried to convince me wearing a red shirt was a bad idea. I refused to change. Funnily enough, they're both dead now..."

For proving that smart weapons aren't always a good idea, our winner is:

phaser: Alright, this is a stick up! Just get up nice and slow, and put those hands where I can see 'em! Oh, and don't make any sudden movements, or else I'll kill you, man, I swear to God I'll kill you!

And for showing that the planet Oz IV doesn't have a competent Delivery Service, our winner is:

Data: But I asked the wizard for a heart, this is Worf's courage.

Congrats to all our winners!

And now, onto our next contest!

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: I caught a trout that was THIS BIG!

Troi: You were vacationing on an Asteroid.

Riker: Whoa! Ensign, I asked for a smooth ride.

Ensign: Sorry Sir.

Data: Guess we won't be seeing you next episode.

Troi: Where are you?

Voice: I'm right here! Stop asking that!

Frakes: Brent, you've gotta start dieting, it takes Michael and me to lift you.

Tarses: Crap, Kirk gets Samuel T. Cogley and I get Riker?!

 

[Saga]

Picard: Water you gonna do, when Picard mania runs wiiiiiiiillllllllddddddd?!

Riker: Wesley told me to tell you...its over.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Picard: Yay me!

 

[Rat Boy]

Troi: "If that's your fighting stance, I can see why you were teased as a child."

Riker (thinking): Why do I get the feeling that it'll be Grignak and Cloud William sitting here before the end of the contest?

Troi: "By the way, what's with the clouds and storm stuff?"

Alien: "We thought the whole 'appearing as your dead dad' thing had been done to death."

Worf: "But I called dibs on Lal!"

Riker: "Rank hath its privileges, Lieutenant. Have fun with Lore."

Worf: "Meh, still better than B-4."

Sabin Genestra: "And do you want to know how we know you're actually part Romulan? You only have one!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

TROI: The whole tough guy pose might go over better if you weren't wearing a blouse and sansabelt slacks.

 

[Captain Crow]

Riker: Your hair smells great.

Riker: Damn speed bumps.

Picard: No woman can handle a force ten Picard! POOM!
[Picard does pelvic thrust]

 

[Subcommander R.]

Picard: If I were rich man...

Unfortunately, the pornography Riker had left on Data's console distracted him from the approaching Borg cube onscreen.

Troi: I'm seeing some sort of terrible vision... Who is this J.J. Abrams?

Worf: I blame you for not renewing our AAA membership.

*facepalm* Oh God, he's trying to lick my neck...

 

[Mojochi]

Picard: But I don't need deodorant. You'll see. Get in there & really get a good whiff

Riker: Either of you got any Dramamine?

Dream flying is all about finger position

Worf: Do I even want to know what you're doing back there?

Good grief, would you get over it, Riker. How many times a day do we all have to show you are necks aren't infested with neural parasites?

 

[Nerys Myk]

Troi was sure she aced the audition for the role of Elphaba in the Enterprise Theatre Group's production of "Wicked".

 

[Subcommander R.]

Troi was sure she aced the audition for the role of Elphaba in the Enterprise Theatre Group's production of "Wicked".

Win.

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Picard: "Extenze, it really works"

Troi: "Remember who you're trying to fool"

 

[Finn]

Picard: ....and that is how I knew there were only four light lights

Troi: Where are you?

Voice: Please Help Us! We have Wesley!

Troi: Sorry, we can't help you

Data's study of being a child has started to take a toll on the senior staff.

Tarses: What about the highly decorated Captain Saavik? Wasn't she part Romulan?

Riker: What they don't teach at the Academy is that Saavik got so big they were unable to get her off the ship. So...not best example, Mr. Tarses.

 

[Kirby]

Picard: Off topic question, but how much do you think I can benchpress? I mean seriously, check out these guns.

During the trying times of when Picard was turned into a child, and the Ferengi had taken over the ship, Riker and Troi visited the holodeck once more. Will took on the role of FBI agent Bill Maxwell, and Deana became The Greatest American Hero... It didn't help them resolve anything, it was just for fun.

Data had fallen, and he couldn't get up!

Riker always new how to cheer up an upset crewman... the neck motorboat.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Tarses: "I didn't even know I was part Romulan! My dad always told me I got my head caught in a mechanical rice-picker. Besides, why didn't anyone say anything during my Academy physicals. Or all the doctor's exams I had in my life? Like last week, I cut my self with the protoplaser, and Doctor Crusher has to patch it up. You'd think she might have pointed out, 'hey Simon, your blood is looking a little green?'. Seriously, you give this accusation a little consideration, and it really doesn't hold water. It's like it's one big... plot contrivance... I have a headache."

Riker: "You might want to shut up now."

 

[Mistral]

Thanks for the win! -MIstral

In a rare editing goof-up, Marina Sirtis was allowed to appear onscreen without photo re-touching.

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Picard: "Yea!!!!!!!!!!!! we got rid of Wesley this year!!"

Troi: "Ah Captain..."

Picard: "She Standing behind me isn't she.."

 

[Isis]

Troi: "On second thought, maybe the black and white part of the Wizard of Oz holodeck program wasn't such a good idea."

 

[Isis]

Troi: "I dreamed I was floating through the Universe in my Maidenform bra...but it's way too small. Next time I should try it on before I buy it."

 

[di_mar]

Troi: Rock...on? There.. I did it.