Things that frustrate us all

[Melakon]

I know it's got to be hard, and that you have people depending on you. If I hadn't always had a cat or dog depending on me, I might have given up long ago. I think it's what keeps me centered. I didn't cope with the divorce well at all, and consider the months after to be my "nervous breakdown". I don't think I really matured until afterwards.

 

[Amaris]

I know it's got to be hard, and that you have people depending on you. If I hadn't always had a cat or dog depending on me, I might have given up long ago. I think it's what keeps me centered. I didn't cope with the divorce well at all, and consider the months after to be my "nervous breakdown". I don't think I really matured until afterwards.

I hate it. I had to grow up while I was still a young teenager, I've felt imprisoned, trapped, suffocated, whatever you want to call it, for so many years, and there just seems to be no end. I just see a life empty, no partner, no kids, no grandkids, just empty. I'm not necessarily old in that future, either, since with the diabetes and other life shortening diseases, making it to my 70s, and beyond, seems like a far fetched prospect. Hell, 60 feels like a long shot at this point. I'm only 34 (though even seeing "34" makes me feel awful), but it feels like everything has already run its course and I'm just playing the waiting game. Do you know what I mean?

 

[Melakon]

I'm surprised I've made it this far. Mom died at 55, dad at 65, and here I am at 63. I think that stroke was trying to take me out at 51, because I'd always had those two milestones ahead of me. I'll likely be a nervous wreck in two years. The way life is presently, I can't imagine what it would be like if I match grandpa's 102. I suppose curiosity of the future is what keeps me alive.

And I do know what you mean. I don't even think about possibly being a father anymore, so I'm the end of the family tree. It's one reason I keep smoking I guess, I don't see any reason to stop if it's just to prolong my life.

 

[Amaris]

I'm surprised I've made it this far. Mom died at 55, dad at 65, and here I am at 63. I think that stroke was trying to take me out at 51, because I'd always had those two milestones ahead of me. I'll likely be a nervous wreck in two years. The way life is presently, I can't imagine what it would be like if I match grandpa's 102. I suppose curiosity of the future is what keeps me alive.

And I do know what you mean. I don't even think about possibly being a father anymore, so I'm the end of the family tree. It's one reason I keep smoking I guess, I don't see any reason to stop if it's just to prolong my life.

*sigh*

[hugs]

 

[rhubarbodendron]

at 63 I agree that fatherhood is not the best of ideas. The risk of genetical flaws would be too big: beyond 40 the risk of improper cell divisions in both male and female starts to rise dramatically; for example the risk of trisomy 21 (Down syndrome) is on average 9 times higher when one parent is 45 than it would be in a parent aged 35 and 90 times higher than in a 25 year old (9% vs 1% vs 0.1 %).
But you could still adopt somebody, even an adult, to carry on the family name. (LOL I shouldn't preach, being beyond childbearing age myself and there being only another 12 people on this planet having the same family name.)

102 Is pretty cool! Shall we make a race? My grandaunt and I made a bet who'll get older. She died 4 years ago aged 103. That means I must get at least 104 or I'll lose my bet. Being a baby boomer the pension I can expect will be sufficient to survive but you could hardly call it a living. On the other hand, I am curious to see what the world will be like in a few decades (propably up to the ears in some catastrophy like WW 3 or another crusade). Somehow the past 5 decades have left me in grave doubts when it comes to humanity's ability to learn from the past.


Talking of humanity's failures: https://uk.news.yahoo.com/phoenix-cow-dies-being-pelted-softballs-181355688.html#g1BCXH8 this news that I just discovered really made me furious. They say the poor animal suffered severe injuries. InjurieS! Plural! That means whoever those idiots were, they didn't stop when they realized they injured the animal but kept on shooting at it and then left it to die a slow agonizing death. These morons are lucky they live 1/3 planet away from me. If I ever caught someone redhanded at doing such a mean, cruel and vicious thing I'd give them such a spanking that they couldn't sit down for the next 25 years.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

J, it makes me very sad that you seem to have sacrificed your every chance at happiness and success for the sake of others.

 

[rhubarbodendron]

Not every chance, Robert. There are plenty of people here who consider J a friend and who'll try and make him happy. And he's very successful at cheering us up when we are in need of a hug.
Wasn't it Archimedes who said "give me a solid point in space and I'll lever the world out of it's hinges"? (well in English he propably phrased it differently I translated the German quote literally). J is such a solid point for many people. As is Melakon, I might add.

 

[Melakon]

I gave up hope of ever being a father after 40. My dad was 47 when I was born, and 60 when I entered my teens, dying when I was 19. I'd never want to put a kid through that. During my successful professional years, I had little social life, and only one potential romantic relationship. So things worked out for the best in that respect.

Talking of humanity's failures

Yeah, that's one way of describing my life, thanks.

And a big hug for J., the son I never had. First time I've ever said that for anyone.

 

[Joel_Kirk]

Well, I do hope Melakon finds his happiness someday....after reading his posts.

Some 'frustrations' off the top of my head:

1. The boldness that the anonymous internet brings. Either by offensive comments or actions that can be racist, sexist, or just plain mean. (I've personally seen and experienced this in Yahoo! comments, Youtube, Trektoday with moderators and users, IMDB).

2. I don't know what my next writing project is. I currently have a short story that is being sent around to publishers, but I need to keep that momentum going.

3. I've gotten to the point where finding a significant other has to really 'gel' with me. I already know what I want physically, but I've become so independent, set in my ways, and I have a certain way I see the world that I need someone to understand or see the world as I do. (There was a nice article that an acquaintance on FB posted months ago about how some introverts look at the world. I'm a partial introvert, since I can hold a conversation if it is geared towards film or filmmaking or girls, but otherwise...it's hard to hold my attention).

4. I want to travel to Kazakhstan, Japan, and South Carolina. However, I don't know when or where my next 'day job' will be in order to make those travel arrangements. Too, I will possibly have to do two out of three since it'll be too expensive and not enough time to visit all of those places.

 

[Tora Ziyal]

4. I want to travel to Kazakhstan, Japan, and South Carolina.

Wow, that's quite a combination of places!

 

[Joel_Kirk]

4. I want to travel to Kazakhstan, Japan, and South Carolina.

Wow, that's quite a combination of places!

I have a friend I met in 2007 at community college who went back to Japan recently. (I forget if it was this year or the last, so much has happened). He was pretty unhappy in the U.S. and seems to be a lot more happier in his home country. Of course, now I have a contact in that country, when I finally get a chance to experience it!

With Kazakhstan, I'm interested in the people. When people talk about Asia, we primarily hear about South, Southeast, and East Asia. However, Kazakhs have different looks amongst themselves....and they speak either Russian or Kazakh.

With South Carolina, there are two acquaintances I met when I was in Singapore 3 years ago. We still keep in touch via Facebook - and I was able to have dinner with one of them when they came to the San Francisco Bay Area for a job interview during my last year at UC Santa Cruz in 2012 - but I want to hang out with them personally. Too, I think I briefly visited S. Carolina when I was little, so this will be a whole 'nother experience!

 

[Taylirious]

I know it's got to be hard, and that you have people depending on you. If I hadn't always had a cat or dog depending on me, I might have given up long ago. I think it's what keeps me centered. I didn't cope with the divorce well at all, and consider the months after to be my "nervous breakdown". I don't think I really matured until afterwards.

I hate it. I had to grow up while I was still a young teenager, I've felt imprisoned, trapped, suffocated, whatever you want to call it, for so many years, and there just seems to be no end. I just see a life empty, no partner, no kids, no grandkids, just empty. I'm not necessarily old in that future, either, since with the diabetes and other life shortening diseases, making it to my 70s, and beyond, seems like a far fetched prospect. Hell, 60 feels like a long shot at this point. I'm only 34 (though even seeing "34" makes me feel awful), but it feels like everything has already run its course and I'm just playing the waiting game. Do you know what I mean?

I know this feeling all too well. My life feels like an endless nightmare.

 

[Random_Spock]

Well, I do hope Melakon finds his happiness someday....after reading his posts.

Some 'frustrations' off the top of my head:

1. The boldness that the anonymous internet brings. Either by offensive comments or actions that can be racist, sexist, or just plain mean. (I've personally seen and experienced this in Yahoo! comments, Youtube, Trektoday with moderators and users, IMDB).

Can relate. Some people are just mean. And they figure being anonymous gives them free reign to say what ever they want to who ever, even if it means offending others. I'm not thin skinned in any way, but something's gotta give there.

 

[Captain Kathryn]

alas, that seems to be a very common procedure nowadays. It's only a very small comfort, I know, but at least you are not alone in this.

{{{Melakon}}} I never understood why people should get measured by the wealth they have accumulated. In my opinion the personal traits are far more important. What good is a rich moron to the world, compared to - for example - a poor street musician who brightens people's days?
You are one of the nicest and most intelligent posters here which is a quantum leap better than all Wall Street billionaires together and I'm proud to know you, no matter what your social or financial status are!

I'm not working at the moment... left my job last week. It's a bit scary but I'm hoping something good will come my way soon.

Wow! That was a curageous thing to do. Frankly, I wouldn't have dared it unless I had already found another job. Good luck! I hope you'll find something really great soon

Oh, it's not technically "quitting". I did leave on my own volition, but they agreed to make it as a lay-off because the company is barely hanging by a string anyway (it's predicted to go out of business soon). So I am getting unemployment money and some weak severance pay. I also have my insurance for a while.

I was at that company for 5 years doing ridiculous overtime (slept in the office many times) so I am taking a 4 week rest before looking for a new job.

Trying to reboot my systems.

 

[Tom Hendricks]

J. Allen, I understand your frustration for I have been there myself. I didn't meet my wife until I was 37, didn't get married until I was 38 and had our first child when I was 39. Now I'm 46 with three children under 5 years old. When you least expect it, love can find a way.

To try and make you feel a little bit better, here is Ian with all his ponies. Hopefully this will cheer you up some.

 

[Taylirious]

I have pretty much given up on the notion of love, starting a family or ever being happy.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ I haven't.

(Well, except for the family part. I know I don't want kids, so that's not technically giving up - just deciding against it. But love and happiness should never be given up on.)

 

[Tora Ziyal]

With Kazakhstan, I'm interested in the people. When people talk about Asia, we primarily hear about South, Southeast, and East Asia. However, Kazakhs have different looks amongst themselves....and they speak either Russian or Kazakh.

Yeah, I have a friend from Azerbaijan. Similar situation. It's a fascinating area! So is Turkey, which is the only part of Asia that I've visited.

 

[Amaris]

Melakon, I'm honored that you feel this way. I won't let you down.

 

[Melakon]

That's my boy!