The Easter Bunny Warrior
By Marie Nomad
It was quiet in Ten Forward as Commander William Riker stared at the Easter Bunny outfit. It was an old-fashioned 20th-century type with felt ears and artificial fur. The fur felt plastic and stiff, and even with the tech inside, it was stiff.
It is tradition for the Enterprise to celebrate Easter with a member of the Senior Staff serving as the ‘Easter Bunny’. Unfortunately, he had drawn the short end of the stick. Last year, Data volunteered to be the Easter Bunny, but he accidentally scared the kids. He paused when he saw Worf entering the room, and Riker smirked.
“Worf, I was wondering, how would you like to be the Easter Bunny?” He asked as he held up the costume to Worf’s chest.
Worf’s eyes darted to him, then to the costume. “You were assigned that role.”
“I know, but I thought, why don’t you try it this year?”
“I am a warrior, not a bunny.”
“Bunnies are tough,” Riker explained. “They are fast and cunning. They must sharpen their teeth, or they will grow through their skulls.”
Worf tilted his head. “They do sound difficult to kill.”
“Exactly, even the French General Napoleon was run off by a horde of bunnies.”
“That’s… impressive.” Worf crossed his arms in deep contemplation. “I had studied Napoleon’s war tactics.”
Riker grinned. He was getting Worf in the mood. Worf doesn’t bluff, and he is a fan of everything warrior-related.
“Do you know the story of Easter?”
“I have heard many,” Worf answered. “I found them lacking.”
“It’s more than that.” Riker was glad that Worf had made it his mission to ignore any Earth holidays, even while growing up around humans. “There was this man called Jesus Christ, who had a bunny bodyguard, while the bunny was away. Jesus was betrayed by one of his followers for 30 pieces of silver. A pitifully low price back then.”
“I have heard of the betrayal of Jesus, not the bunny bodyguard.”
“It was an alternative version.”
“I see. Go on, tell me about the bunny bodyguard.” Worf leaned closer, showing how intrigued he was. That was one of the reasons he was bad at poker.
“The bunny in revenge tried to kill Judas, but Judas killed himself, denying the bunny his chance.”
“Failure to avenge his friend. That would cause great shame.” Worf agreed, his head tilted back in contemplation.
“Jesus returned to life after three days, and the bunny begged for forgiveness for failing to save Jesus. Jesus forgave him. The bunny vowed to show compassion by giving gifts in the form of eggs.”
“Bunnies do not lay eggs.” Worf tilted his head.
“It’s a symbol of rebirth, just like with Jesus being reborn,” Riker thought quickly.
“A ritual of atonement.” Worf’s back straightened as he gazed at the costume. “People must know about this story. I will bring honor to this proud story.”
“I know you can do it!” Riker slapped him on the shoulder. And gave the costume with a great flourish.
“I will need to make adjustments.”
“Go ahead.” Worf snatched the costume in his hands. He studied it intensely and then nodded. He hurried off to the replicators with the costume waving alongside him.
Guinan, who was listening from the bar, spoke up with a twinkle in her eye. “You have done it now.”
“It’s just the Easter Bunny.”
“You planted a seed, and now, you will see how it grows.”
XXX
At the Annual Easter Egg Hunt, Riker looked on with pride.
“I cannot believe you managed to convince Worf to be the Easter Bunny,” Picard said, amused as he looked around.
“I didn’t want to be the Easter Bunny, do you?”
“No. No.”
“I am going to take a picture of it.” Riker chuckled.
Suddenly, the shofar blared out of the speakers. Worf marched in a white Klingon Uniform with giant metal plates, decorated with Easter colors.
In his hand was a large staff that clunked every time he pounded the floor with it; on top was a giant, glimmering, golden easter egg.
To top it all off, Worf was wearing a helmet with a pair of metal bunny ears that looked like horns. “I am the Easter Bunny!” Worf proclaimed. “In atonement for failing to save Jesus Christ, I had hidden eggs in this area! Find the eggs and bring glory!”
Riker’s jaw dropped as the kids cheered. The little kids started rushing around looking for the eggs. Worf stood there with his arms crossed, but his face was relaxed, and his sharp teeth showed.
Picard leaned closer to his subordinate and whispered. “I don’t recall reading about the Easter Bunny in the Bible.”
“Obscure translation,” Riker answered.
“Ah.”
“It’s just one time.”
Several years later…
Commander Riker was sitting in his office when he got a message from Chief O’Brien in Deep Space Nine. The message heading read “This is your fault.”
What did he do?
Confused, he clicked on the message and saw an article by Jake Sisko. It was a lighthearted piece about how Deep Space Nine celebrated Easter.
To celebrate Easter, Deep Space Nine had arranged an Easter Egg hunt led by Commander Worf dressed as the Easter Bunny Warrior.
“Oh no.” Riker read on.
Worf dressed as the Easter Bunny Warrior on the USS Enterprise D, inspired by the Easter Bunny story told by Commander William Riker.
His name was mentioned. Riker winced at it.
Other Klingons heard about the Easter Bunny's Rite of Atonement in honor of his boss, Jesus Christ, and are planning to hold their own Easter celebrations.
“What?” Riker muttered out loud.
Worf is currently giving lessons on how to be the Easter Bunny.
“What have I done?”
The End
By Marie Nomad
It was quiet in Ten Forward as Commander William Riker stared at the Easter Bunny outfit. It was an old-fashioned 20th-century type with felt ears and artificial fur. The fur felt plastic and stiff, and even with the tech inside, it was stiff.
It is tradition for the Enterprise to celebrate Easter with a member of the Senior Staff serving as the ‘Easter Bunny’. Unfortunately, he had drawn the short end of the stick. Last year, Data volunteered to be the Easter Bunny, but he accidentally scared the kids. He paused when he saw Worf entering the room, and Riker smirked.
“Worf, I was wondering, how would you like to be the Easter Bunny?” He asked as he held up the costume to Worf’s chest.
Worf’s eyes darted to him, then to the costume. “You were assigned that role.”
“I know, but I thought, why don’t you try it this year?”
“I am a warrior, not a bunny.”
“Bunnies are tough,” Riker explained. “They are fast and cunning. They must sharpen their teeth, or they will grow through their skulls.”
Worf tilted his head. “They do sound difficult to kill.”
“Exactly, even the French General Napoleon was run off by a horde of bunnies.”
“That’s… impressive.” Worf crossed his arms in deep contemplation. “I had studied Napoleon’s war tactics.”
Riker grinned. He was getting Worf in the mood. Worf doesn’t bluff, and he is a fan of everything warrior-related.
“Do you know the story of Easter?”
“I have heard many,” Worf answered. “I found them lacking.”
“It’s more than that.” Riker was glad that Worf had made it his mission to ignore any Earth holidays, even while growing up around humans. “There was this man called Jesus Christ, who had a bunny bodyguard, while the bunny was away. Jesus was betrayed by one of his followers for 30 pieces of silver. A pitifully low price back then.”
“I have heard of the betrayal of Jesus, not the bunny bodyguard.”
“It was an alternative version.”
“I see. Go on, tell me about the bunny bodyguard.” Worf leaned closer, showing how intrigued he was. That was one of the reasons he was bad at poker.
“The bunny in revenge tried to kill Judas, but Judas killed himself, denying the bunny his chance.”
“Failure to avenge his friend. That would cause great shame.” Worf agreed, his head tilted back in contemplation.
“Jesus returned to life after three days, and the bunny begged for forgiveness for failing to save Jesus. Jesus forgave him. The bunny vowed to show compassion by giving gifts in the form of eggs.”
“Bunnies do not lay eggs.” Worf tilted his head.
“It’s a symbol of rebirth, just like with Jesus being reborn,” Riker thought quickly.
“A ritual of atonement.” Worf’s back straightened as he gazed at the costume. “People must know about this story. I will bring honor to this proud story.”
“I know you can do it!” Riker slapped him on the shoulder. And gave the costume with a great flourish.
“I will need to make adjustments.”
“Go ahead.” Worf snatched the costume in his hands. He studied it intensely and then nodded. He hurried off to the replicators with the costume waving alongside him.
Guinan, who was listening from the bar, spoke up with a twinkle in her eye. “You have done it now.”
“It’s just the Easter Bunny.”
“You planted a seed, and now, you will see how it grows.”
XXX
At the Annual Easter Egg Hunt, Riker looked on with pride.
“I cannot believe you managed to convince Worf to be the Easter Bunny,” Picard said, amused as he looked around.
“I didn’t want to be the Easter Bunny, do you?”
“No. No.”
“I am going to take a picture of it.” Riker chuckled.
Suddenly, the shofar blared out of the speakers. Worf marched in a white Klingon Uniform with giant metal plates, decorated with Easter colors.
In his hand was a large staff that clunked every time he pounded the floor with it; on top was a giant, glimmering, golden easter egg.
To top it all off, Worf was wearing a helmet with a pair of metal bunny ears that looked like horns. “I am the Easter Bunny!” Worf proclaimed. “In atonement for failing to save Jesus Christ, I had hidden eggs in this area! Find the eggs and bring glory!”
Riker’s jaw dropped as the kids cheered. The little kids started rushing around looking for the eggs. Worf stood there with his arms crossed, but his face was relaxed, and his sharp teeth showed.
Picard leaned closer to his subordinate and whispered. “I don’t recall reading about the Easter Bunny in the Bible.”
“Obscure translation,” Riker answered.
“Ah.”
“It’s just one time.”
Several years later…
Commander Riker was sitting in his office when he got a message from Chief O’Brien in Deep Space Nine. The message heading read “This is your fault.”
What did he do?
Confused, he clicked on the message and saw an article by Jake Sisko. It was a lighthearted piece about how Deep Space Nine celebrated Easter.
To celebrate Easter, Deep Space Nine had arranged an Easter Egg hunt led by Commander Worf dressed as the Easter Bunny Warrior.
“Oh no.” Riker read on.
Worf dressed as the Easter Bunny Warrior on the USS Enterprise D, inspired by the Easter Bunny story told by Commander William Riker.
His name was mentioned. Riker winced at it.
Other Klingons heard about the Easter Bunny's Rite of Atonement in honor of his boss, Jesus Christ, and are planning to hold their own Easter celebrations.
“What?” Riker muttered out loud.
Worf is currently giving lessons on how to be the Easter Bunny.
“What have I done?”
The End
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