The Dominion Triumphant: A Star Trek Dystopia

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by doublegoodprole, Nov 21, 2012.

  1. Ar-Pharazon

    Ar-Pharazon Vice Admiral Premium Member

    May 19, 2005
    I just found this thread. Good premise & good writing.

    I wouldn't worry about every conversation being perfect or "Earth" shatteringly significant, you've got the character interactions down pat.

    Even the movies & TV episodes have less exciting moments.

    I'm glad you're exploring multiple storylines, they're all seriously interesting.
  2. Tribble puncher

    Tribble puncher Captain Captain

    Jan 17, 2012
    The Future
    I'm really enjoying this so far, I've always wanted to read something about the fall of the federation, and I really enjoy how your nailing the characters, It's fun to see the bad-guys win from time to time. And reading the parts with Dukat as "lord of the earth" are the reasons why. The guy clearly has long term goals, which don't involve the Dominion I think. This is one of those Fanfics that surpasses alot of whats been published...I see a good future ahead of you as a writer
  3. Blip

    Blip Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    May 2, 2001
    Deck 15, section 21-Alpha
    All of this has been wonderfully well thought-out so far, and as mentioned previously every character feels exactly like how we'd expect them to be. No-one is out of character, and I think we all agree we can easily visualise the actors speaking their respective lines. There are people elsewhere who can't even keep their own character creations consistent (you hear me, former Voyager writers?!) but this has all been solid stuff so far.

    To echo Tribble Puncher, IMO you have a great future both as a contributor to the forum and as a writer.

    Now, MOAR! :D
  4. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    U.S.S. Enterprise
    In Orbit of Planet Terra Prime
    M-33 Galaxy
    Stardate 57392.9 (January 4, 2381)

    “Have you made any progress in accessing the Bajoran Orb, Admiral?”

    Picard glanced at Data as he tapped more variables into the control panel. “I’m afraid not, Mr. Data. Perhaps only an actual Bajoran can tap into whatever energy powers this orb.”

    “Such a supposition is not supported by the available evidence,” Data countered. “On Deep Space Nine, both Captain Benjamin Sisko and—“

    “I’m aware of recorded non-Bajoran orb encounters, Data,” Picard snapped. He instantly regretted it. “I’m sorry, Data. I’m afraid I lose my temper quite often these days.”

    “Understandable, Admiral,” Data replied without emotion. Well, of course.

    “I’ve been engaged in this task for three months now,” Picard said, leaning on the workbench upon which the orb rested. ‘I’ve called in every crew person with even a hint of psionic ability. But without an actual Bajoran, I fear that I will never be able to exhaust all avenues of speculation.”

    Data was, as always, unmoved. “Have you attempted accessing Bajoran Database 1432?”

    Picard nodded. “Of course.” The admiral threw his PADD down on the workbench. “Nothing.”

    The door chimed, and both Picard and Data looked up. “Enter,” Picard said quietly.

    Picard’s former first officer, now officially named the captain of the Enterprise, entered the workspace. Picard had known the man for nearly twenty years, and had trusted him with his life many times over. And now, in this place of exile, Captain Worf was one of Picard’s closest confidants.

    “Admiral,” Worf grumbled, ignoring the android. “We have completed sensor scans of the sector.” The Klingon, fitted now with a prosthetic arm, handed a PADD to the admiral. “As of now there is still no evidence of any spacefaring species within sensor range.”

    “On the other hand, we have thirty-eight class-M planets,” Picard remarked. “So there is plenty of room to expand in the coming centuries.”

    “It would appear so, sir."

    Picard continued scanning the report. “Have you made any progress in selecting a breeding partner, Number One?”

    Worf grunted. “No, sir. I’m afraid my duties have precluded such a…personal endeavor.”

    Picard handed the Klingon the PADD. “I’m afraid it’s not so personal, Captain. Quite frankly, we need to introduce as much variety into our gene pool as we possibly can—and soon.”

    “Mr. Worf,” Data said, “Have you considered mating with any of the—“

    “Computer, freeze program,” Worf barked. The android froze.

    “Something wrong, Captain Worf?” Picard said nonchalantly as he once again picked up the PADD containing all information gathered on the mystery Bajoran orb.

    “I apologize, Admiral,” Worf said quietly. “It simply…bothers me to carry on a conversation with a simulacrum of a lost comrade.”

    Picard nodded. “My apologies, Captain. I sometimes use Mr. Data as a sounding board for my more… unorthodox theories.” He glanced back at the frozen android. “Computer, end program Picard-47.”

    Data vanished.

    Fleet Log, Stardate 57395.2: Under Captain Worf’s capable leadership, efforts to refit the remaining vessels in the fleet have proven quite successful and should be complete by the end of the year. Captain Gomez reports the planetary habitats can now accommodate one hundred more personnel. Captain Gomez estimates that the Terra Prime colony will be self-sufficient and able to comfortably fit everyone in the fleet within just three years.

    I’m afraid I have not made any significant progress on accessing whatever might be contained inside the Bajoran artifact so inexplicably uncovered on Terra Prime three months ago. The odds of such an artifact turning up in a galaxy almost three million light years away is quite literally astronomical…

    Jean-Luc Picard scanned the orb with a tricorder for what must have been the thousandth time. Probably a very low estimate, he thought bitterly. Picard half-seriously considered firing a hand phaser at it, just to see what would happen. But while satisfying, that would probably have been…unwise.

    Picard put the tricorder down and rubbed his face. He considered starting up the Data program, but thought better of it. Perhaps Worf was right to be bothered by the idea of talking to a simulacrum of someone that was now several lifetimes away. It was an example of holding on to the dead past, and letting go of that past was something Picard had been exhorting all of the Milky Way exiles to do for the last six months.

    “Practice what you preach, Picard,” the admiral mumbled to himself. Perhaps he should simply delete the Data program altogether.

    But the urge to call Data back was hard to resist. How many times had Picard given the android counsel onboard the Enterprise-D, each time learning something new himself? How often had Picard marveled at how far the android had come, at how much potential there was for him to grow?

    The Enterprise-D, Picard thought to himself with a slight shiver of cynicism. Where the biggest problem was whether or not the damned holodeck would try to kill you. How he so deeply missed those times, though. How he missed sitting in that luxurious command chair, flying through space and meeting every challenge head-on. They had been legends—and rightfully so.

    But that ship had been destroyed, and the Federation hadn’t survived much longer. ‘All good things must come to an end, Jean-Luc,’ Q had whispered in his ear. Yes. Indeed.

    “Sorry, Data,” Picard said to himself. “I think—I know you would understand.”

    The slight hum of the ship’s engines was the only reply.

    “Computer,” Picard said, closing his eyes. “Delete program Picard-47.”

    “Program deleted,” the computer replied, without emotion. Well, of course.

    Picard breathed deeply and opened his eyes. There. He had done it. Data was now safely in the dead past, in a past that was now spinning in space three million light years away.

    And still, the orb sat on the workbench, silently mocking him with the secrets it contained. Picard did not know what to do about it, and the feeling was unpleasant. This was a mystery that nagged at him. In his younger days, before the coming of the Dominion, such a conundrum would have been a pleasure to slowly attempt to solve—and Picard would have been satisfied even if the problem had proven insoluble.

    But not now.

    Picard’s hand slowly moved towards the phaser holstered at his hip.

    “No, damn it,” he muttered. “Don’t even think about it.”

    But the orb continued to mock him with its silence. There was only so much scanning a man could do. Picard found himself gripping the phaser in his hand.

    “A low setting,” Picard whispered to himself. “That is where I'll begin.”

    Picard took aim and fired at the orb. For three seconds, the energy beam engulfed the artifact, and…nothing.

    Three times Picard fired his weapon, setting the level higher each time. The phaser had no effect. Amazingly, the orb wasn’t even singed from the blasts.

    The admiral finally set his phaser on the highest setting. If fired at a corporeal being at this setting, the energy beam would immediately vaporize the entity into its composite atoms. Firing the beam at a Bajoran orb could do exactly the same.

    Picard fired.

    For a moment, nothing happened. Picard had just about holstered his weapon when suddenly—there it was! The orb began to radiate gorgeous red light. The holodeck was awash in a red glow as Picard found himself holding his breath. It was beautiful. Wisps of energy hurled themselves out of the orb in a chaotic frenzy, and suddenly Picard was thrown back by a shockwave.

    “Target the lead Jem’Hadar ship,” Picard interjected. “Attack pattern Picard-Zeta-Three.”

    “Ready phasers, sir.”


    Picard held up his hands to block out the red light, slowly growing in intensity.

    “Captain Jean-Luc Picard, you lead the strongest ship of the Federation fleet. You speak for your people.”
    “I have nothing to say to you, and I will resist you with my last ounce of strength."

    “Strength is irrelevant. Resistance is futile. We wish to improve ourselves. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service ours.”
    “Impossible. My culture is based on freedom and self-determination.”

    “Freedom is irrelevant. Self-determination is irrelevant. You must comply.”

    “We would rather die.”

    Death is irrelevant Death is irrelevant Death is irrelevant Death is irrelevant Death is irrelevant

    Picard screamed.

    A small creature scurries quickly through a Jeffries Tube. The Enterprise’s internal sensors have not yet been completely repaired after suffering extensive damage in battle, so the creature will likely not be detected and reported to the appropriate crewmembers.

    It is an Earth field mouse. Stopping briefly, the mouse sniffs the air. Scrubbed oxygen. It continues its journey along the Jeffries Tube, slowly making its way to Main Engineering.
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2013
  5. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    Solid advice, thank you. I've been thinking about it while writing. I find posting in scattered 'updates' has really impacted my writing style strangely.
  6. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    Wow, that's really amazing praise! I'm really glad you think I'm nailing the characters; that's something I try hard to do.
  7. Tribble puncher

    Tribble puncher Captain Captain

    Jan 17, 2012
    The Future
    Really enjoyed this latest installment...I felt like I could relate in a way, I had been holding onto something from my past that I needed to let go, and it was hard to finally make that choice, but it had to be done for the sake of the future. One very small..teeny weeny nit-pick, you state that the Enterprises sensors couldn't detect a field mouse inside the ship because they were "focused on bigger and more important things". This doesn't seem to make sense, I would suggest the sensor's are off line because parts had been cannibalised for more critical needs. this is a flotilla of ships without a proper industrial base after all...again, a minor thing...I'm loving this story..
  8. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    Thanks, that's incredibly nice to hear (but probably undeserved). I really do try to visualize the character saying the lines I write, which does help a lot.
  9. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    So noted (and changed). I think I had a point as to why the sensors wouldn't pick up a mouse, but on second thought it's not really valid no matter what I used as an excuse. The internal sensors were officially damaged during the battle. That's my new line on that one...thanks for the help!
  10. Nerys Ghemor

    Nerys Ghemor Vice Admiral Admiral

    Aug 4, 2008
    Cardăsa Terăm--Nerys Ghemor
    Oh, boy...that Bajoran artifact Picard found...after what happened (so far) after Picard fired on it, I'm getting a very bad feeling as to what it might be. That said, I could also be wrong, considering what happened in "Emissary" to Sisko, and the tone his visions took.

    As for that mouse...I have a theory on that, too, though it could be either a huge boon, or a terrible disaster...

    And more on the dynamics of the ruling junta! Your portrayal of Dukat victorious is fascinating, and I can't wait to see how his excursion goes.

    Keep it coming! :D
  11. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    Erehwon—Chapter Six
    U.S.S. Voyager
    In Orbit of Planet Erehwon

    Delta Quadrant
    Stardate 57505.83 (February 18, 2381)


    Kathryn Janeway broke free from her reverie and cleared her throat. “Tuvok. Yes. Come in, please.”

    Her Vulcan first officer entered the ready room. “Captain. It is 0900 hours. The crew is assembled in the Recreation Deck, as per your orders.”

    Janeway nodded slowly. “Right.” She got up and stretched, taking a moment to look out at the bright blue planet below. Wispy clouds floated across a large stretch of ocean.

    “I haven’t been looking forward to this moment, Tuvok.”

    Tuvok straightened, hands clasped behind his back. “It would be illogical for you to positively anticipate such an event, Captain. “

    Janeway smiled. “That’s true.” She turned to face the Vulcan, a decade’s worth of worry and concern bearing down on her soul. “But this is the speech I’ve always dreaded having to make, Tuvok. To tell this crew, this family, that their journey must end here…it breaks my heart.”

    “Considering the changes that have occurred in the Alpha Quadrant during our absence, your decision is in fact most rational, Captain.”

    Janeway placed her hand on the window, gazing out at the planet below. “I never had any doubt that this ship would make it home. No matter what the universe dished out at us, we survived…and kept going. The Kazon, the Borg, Species 8472, the Korroalis...” Janeway trailed off.

    Tuvok keenly felt the emotional loss that the Dominion victory over the Federation represented for both his people and the crew of the Voyager as a whole. He had read the Vulcan Instrument of Surrender to the Dominion, and it was only logical to assume that his family had either been killed or sent to a labor camp. Tuvok deeply felt their loss. He could feel the ancient Vulcan rage burning within him, suppressed only through the strong discipline of logic. Outwardly, of course, he exhibited none of this. Of course.

    “Nevertheless, Captain,” said Tuvok, “the crew of this vessel have always trusted your judgment. Despite what has happened in the Alpha Quadrant, that one simple fact has not changed.”

    Janeway closed her eyes and allowed her mind to drift homewards, if only for a second. “And you sincerely believe I am not betraying that trust?”

    Tuvok raised an eyebrow. “My feelings are irrelevant, Captain. Based upon all available evidence, to believe such a thing would be quite illogical.”

    Janeway smiled in spite of herself. No matter what happened, she knew she could always rely on Tuvok. He was her rock, her calm in the midst of this terrible storm…a storm that showed no sign of abating.

    “Come on, old friend,” Janeway said quietly, approaching the waiting Vulcan. “Let’s go talk to them.”

    On Voyager’s recreation deck, all of the ship’s personnel milled around in small groups. Some nervously made small talk while awaiting Janeway’s arrival; others simply waited quietly, waiting for confirmation of the inevitable. Finally, at 09:15 hours, the bosuns whistle sounded and the crew’s attention turned to the dais that had been set up on the deck.

    Behind the dais, a turbolift door opened and Janeway and Tuvok appeared. The two mounted the dais and Commander Tuvok stepped to the podium, ahead of the captain.

    “Captain on deck,” he called out sternly.

    The crew—Starfleet and civilian alike—snapped to attention.

    Tuvok briskly walked down the steps and joined the crew at attention.

    Janeway gripped the sides of the podium.

    “At ease,” she said.

    All eyes were on Janeway as she contemplated saying the words that would most certainly change all of their lives forever. This was the moment.

    “Good morning.” Janeway made eye contact with Tuvok, who nodded almost imperceptibly. She continued:

    “On Stardate 57385, Voyager unexpectedly made contact with the U.S.S. Defiant while en route to the Alpha Quadrant. While it was a great relief to finally get back in touch with Starfleet, the circumstances that made our meeting possible were not the happy ones we had all dreamed about since our arrival in the Delta Quadrant.”

    Janeway loosened her grip on the podium. “Two years after we were flung across the galaxy by the Caretaker Array, the Dominion invaded the Federation and our allies in the Klingon Empire. Aided by an alliance of Alpha Quadrant powers hostile to the Federation, the Dominion successfully prosecuted their war of aggression. Within five short years, the Klingon Empire had been all but annihilated… and the Federation had been dissolved.”

    “Tragically,” Janeway continued, “the destination this ship and this crew have been striving towards for the last ten years is now an occupied world. Earth is in enemy hands. Our friends…our families…they are all now under the yoke of the Dominion.”

    The assemblage stood in silent agony. Janeway took a deep breath and continued.

    “If it had not been for our fortuitous encounter with the Defiant, this ship and crew would have continued on to Earth…only to wind up in the hands of a brutal and ruthless enemy…or worse.”

    "Together, this crew has spent ten years trying to escape the Delta Quadrant. Now, as fate would have it, we find our exiled compatriots seeking refuge here. They have welcomed us with open arms. And much like us, they were forced to undertake a voyage to the unknown against their will. Is it simply coincidence that here, deep in unexplored space, we have come together?”

    Janeway shook her head. “I refuse to believe it is. Ladies and gentlemen, I have always feared there would come a day when I would have to give the order to abandon our course for home. Nothing is or has ever been more important to me than making sure each and every one of you once again see the skies of your home world.”

    Janeway confidently faced her crew. “But if Erehwon is to be where the place where we make a stand against tyranny, then we belong here. For now, this is our home. We know this quadrant. We have made many friends, and many enemies here. I firmly believe that the men, women, and children on this vessel can contribute to the war effort. We must help the fleet here at Erehwon recover its strength and grow. We must forge alliances. We must rebuild so that one day, we can take back what’s ours.”

    The crowd was beginning to shake off the despair. People were roused. “I want you all to remember one very important thing. Voyager’s mission to return to the Alpha Quadrant is far from over.” Janeway smiled confidently. “Someday, this ship will return to Earth. That, my friends, is my solemn promise to you.”

    The crowd erupted in cheers. Janeway smiled, and honestly could not tell if the lump in her throat was pride in her crew or a deep, abiding sadness.

    Admiral William Ross, in his office planetside, watched on his viewer as the Voyager crew applauded their captain. Turning the display off, he turned to the man sitting across from him in Ross’s private quarters.

    “What do you think, Sloan?”

    The human male shrugged noncommittally. “We knew this day was coming, Admiral. As expected, Janeway is doing exactly what we need her to do.”

    Ross frowned. The admiral was slightly anxious with how fast things were moving along. “You’re sure we’re ready for this?”

    Sloan smiled, but as always the gesture seemed somewhat insincere. “Admiral Ross,” the man replied, “I have never been so sure of anything in my life.”
  12. doublegoodprole

    doublegoodprole Captain Captain

    Sep 29, 2010
    Me either, actually.

  13. Zefram_Cochrane

    Zefram_Cochrane First Faster Than Light Red Shirt

    Jan 17, 2008
    Silicon Valley, CA, USA
    I just read through the entire story you've posted so far and I must say that I'm really impressed with how you've taken this particular 'what if' situation! Though, I must say that you've left me with a lot of questions that I'm eager to see the answers to in future posts of this story. :)

    Please keep writing!

    -- ZC
  14. DanCPA

    DanCPA Admiral Admiral

    Jul 7, 2001
    TrekBBS C/O 2001
    Will there ever be another addition?
  15. 6079SmithW

    6079SmithW Vice Admiral Admiral

    Sep 18, 2009
    I have thoroughly enjoyed reading this story, doublegoodprole. I hope that you will continue it so we all can see what fates befall our exiled heroes and scheming villains.
  16. Anonn

    Anonn Ensign Newbie

    Aug 23, 2013
    Wow, I'm sorry to see that DGP seems to have stopped writing this. I came upon it, and even though I'm not usually a fan of dystopic worlds, I was really into it. I really do like the idea of fanfic that takes place after the end of DS9 (even under an altered timeline) with mostly canon characters.

    And this was really well done.

    I guess it's unlikely we'll see more of it, but that's really too bad.
  17. vulcan redshirt

    vulcan redshirt Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Jun 22, 2013
    I have enjoyed this too, and wish to thank DGP for his work. It is a slight concern however that his last post above seems to be his last appearance on trekbbs. hopefully he is well and feels able to come back at some point.
  18. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    May 10, 2005
    The visitor's bullpen
    I'd call it DoublePLUSgood. :techman: