The Daughter of the 5th House

[Marynator]

Lwaxana triggers me, she is very much like my own mother, except my mother's much worse. I feel they're playing her for laughs, but real overbearing (and probably narcissistic!) parents like her can really be absolute nightmares, she can really try to control your life and not give up easily at all. From things like telling you what clothes you should wear, and who your friends should be, what you should study in school, and what this show doesn't really tell you is just how angry she'll get if you don't do what she wants.

My favorite Lwaxana episode really is Dark Page, I felt she was used much more interestingly there, and I enjoyed exploring her psyche and discovering her repressed pain, and how she made such a connection with her daughter through that.

 

[Nyotarules]

Dark Page explains excellently why she is so overbearing with Deanna. Generally I find overbearing woman are either hiding some serious pain like Lwaxana or are borderline narcissistic sociopaths.

 

[Nakita Akita]

After all these years it really kind of creeps me out to see Robert Knepper playing such a...nice guy. You really can't watch that episode now without going "Hey! It's T-Bag!"

I googled him and I don't even recall him on the show! Who was he?

 

[Nakita Akita]

Lwaxana triggers me, she is very much like my own mother, except my mother's much worse. I feel they're playing her for laughs, but real overbearing (and probably narcissistic!) parents like her can really be absolute nightmares, she can really try to control your life and not give up easily at all. From things like telling you what clothes you should wear, and who your friends should be, what you should study in school, and what this show doesn't really tell you is just how angry she'll get if you don't do what she wants.

My favorite Lwaxana episode really is Dark Page, I felt she was used much more interestingly there, and I enjoyed exploring her psyche and discovering her repressed pain, and how she made such a connection with her daughter through that.

If I had a mother like that, I'd have requested to be sent away to boarding school.

 

[Nyotarules]

If I had a mother like that, I'd have requested to be sent away to boarding school.

Or put yourself up for adoption lol
One of my aunts is a toxic mother, she acts like she hates her children, but treats all other relatives and friends wonderfully.

 

[Marynator]

If I had a mother like that, I'd have requested to be sent away to boarding school.

Probably the worst thing my mother ever did to me, she actually picked out a husband for me in some sort of twisted idea of arranged marriage or something. She told this guy I would love him and marry him, and that was a real mess, I was so angry and upset I didn't speak with her for over 3 years.

I guess I just really don't feel TNG did a very good job showing how toxic such parenting can be for a child, and how her relationship with her mother can really be strained, it's sort of hurtful to play it just for laughs like it's funny. I'm sorry if I'm being overly hard on her, she's just very triggering for me.

 

[Riker'sMailbox]

I liked her. She was overbearing, overdramatic, overstyled, over the top. She was also fun and kind and caring and lively and was a good counterpoint to the stuffiness of the Federation. She also showed overt sexuality in a woman of a certain age and that is rarely shown on any kind of screen, but is important.

 

[Nakita Akita]

Probably the worst thing my mother ever did to me, she actually picked out a husband for me in some sort of twisted idea of arranged marriage or something. She told this guy I would love him and marry him, and that was a real mess, I was so angry and upset I didn't speak with her for over 3 years.

I guess I just really don't feel TNG did a very good job showing how toxic such parenting can be for a child, and how her relationship with her mother can really be strained, it's sort of hurtful to play it just for laughs like it's funny. I'm sorry if I'm being overly hard on her, she's just very triggering for me.

I think on a non-superficial level Leaxana wasn't toxic to Deanna.
Overbearing, over the top, yes, but in the end it was obvious that she really wanted what was best for her daughter.

 

[Nyotarules]

Probably the worst thing my mother ever did to me, she actually picked out a husband for me in some sort of twisted idea of arranged marriage or something. She told this guy I would love him and marry him, and that was a real mess, I was so angry and upset I didn't speak with her for over 3 years.

I guess I just really don't feel TNG did a very good job showing how toxic such parenting can be for a child, and how her relationship with her mother can really be strained, it's sort of hurtful to play it just for laughs like it's funny. I'm sorry if I'm being overly hard on her, she's just very triggering for me.

Did you marry the guy your mother picked!!!!!

 

[Riker'sMailbox]

Probably the worst thing my mother ever did to me, she actually picked out a husband for me in some sort of twisted idea of arranged marriage or something. She told this guy I would love him and marry him, and that was a real mess, I was so angry and upset I didn't speak with her for over 3 years.

I guess I just really don't feel TNG did a very good job showing how toxic such parenting can be for a child, and how her relationship with her mother can really be strained, it's sort of hurtful to play it just for laughs like it's funny. I'm sorry if I'm being overly hard on her, she's just very triggering for me.

I am sorry you had a bad relationship with your mom.

 

[Nyotarules]

I think on a non-superficial level Leaxana wasn't toxic to Deanna.
Overbearing, over the top, yes, but in the end it was obvious that she really wanted what was best for her daughter.

Have you read the A time series when she plans the wedding? LOL

 

[Nakita Akita]

Have you read the A time series when she plans the wedding? LOL

I read one where Deanna and Riker where on the planet. There was a wedding.
I can't remember who was getting married!
I read it a long time ago.
I think it was supposed to be before the two where on the Enterprise.
Maybe.
I read it a long time ago.
And I've read probably about, seriously, 80 or so TREK books.

 

[Marynator]

Did you marry the guy your mother picked!!!!!

Oh dear, absolutely not! I was so deeply offended, and it was so awkward telling him this wasn't going to happen. And my mother was mad at me for not doing what she said.

@Nakita Akita I totally get she didn't end up being toxic for Deanna specifically, I think just because of my personal experiences I struggle understanding how such an overbearing parent doesn't become toxic, if I'm making sense?

 

[Nyotarules]

I read one where Deanna and Riker where on the planet. There was a wedding.
I can't remember who was getting married!
I read it a long time ago.
I think it was supposed to be before the two where on the Enterprise.
Maybe.
I read it a long time ago.
And I've read probably about, seriously, 80 or so TREK books.

Sounds like the Imzadi series by Peter David (I read that decades ago as well)

 

[Mutai Sho-Rin]

Probably the worst thing my mother ever did to me, she actually picked out a husband for me in some sort of twisted idea of arranged marriage or something. She told this guy I would love him and marry him, and that was a real mess, I was so angry and upset I didn't speak with her for over 3 years.

I guess I just really don't feel TNG did a very good job showing how toxic such parenting can be for a child, and how her relationship with her mother can really be strained, it's sort of hurtful to play it just for laughs like it's funny. I'm sorry if I'm being overly hard on her, she's just very triggering for me.

If you have never seen the cult classic Harold and Maude, you must run out in the next ten minutes and find a copy. The first time I shared it with the Lady Sho-Rin nearly 40 years ago, it creeped her out for weeks due to the domineering mother in the movie. It hit too close to home. The music, BTW, is all by Cat Stevens and includes many of my favorite songs of his.
Sorry for the OT. Now, back to our regular programming.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

I googled him and I don't even recall him on the show! Who was he?

On TNG, he was Wyatt Miller (the guy Deanna was supposed to marry).

However, most people these days know him for playing despicable slime, like T-Bag from Prison Break.

 

[Sophie74656]

I guess I'm in the minority. I love the character

 

[Nakita Akita]

On TNG, he was Wyatt Miller (the guy Deanna was supposed to marry).

However, most people these days know him for playing despicable slime, like T-Bag from Prison Break.

I don't have cable/internet TV.
I pretty much watch old re-runs.
I've never even heard of Prison Break.

I thought Wyatt, as ALL of Deanna's men with a somewhat exception being Riker, was creepy.
" oh across time and space I've been sketching You, my dearest. See all of my paintings I've done if you?"
Yikes!!!!
Too scary! The blond chick needed to run away.
Plus he looked creepy too.
All her BF's look creepy though(except Riker but he's dawg, so that counts as at least some Creep points)

 

[Nakita Akita]

Oh dear, absolutely not! I was so deeply offended, and it was so awkward telling him this wasn't going to happen. And my mother was mad at me for not doing what she said.

@Nakita Akita I totally get she didn't end up being toxic for Deanna specifically, I think just because of my personal experiences I struggle understanding how such an overbearing parent doesn't become toxic, if I'm making sense?

I thinks Lwaxana is over bearing to a point.
But not toxic.
People ARE control of themselves. Lwaxana pushes Deanna but stops when she feels she tried enough, or it's not going to work. I think she's cute, but my mom was not in anyway like her.

 

[Kilana2]

I can clearly see a difference between TNG Lwaxana and DS9 Lwaxana. It didn't help that in the German episodes they used different voice actresses in the dubbing. I liked DS9 Lwaxana better...... Her moments with Odo were hilarious.....

But she had great TNG moments, too. When she had to deal with Kestra's death for instance.