The amazing Trek movie-era six-word story

"No matter," Riker uttered, "Tonight I'm

 

going where no man has gone

 

to the toilet before: behind Quark's

 

back while he's chatting up Dax

 

to distract from his smuggling of

 

rare live Haggis. He wanted to

 

have two helpings, but that would

 

have triggered the alarms.
Such hazardous

 

consumption of wild animals caused interstellar

 

flatulence that could potentially destroy entire

 

quadrants. And by "quadrants", I mean

 

the four-legged beast with two backs

 

, a euphemism for two people wantonly

 

engaged in the other Riker manoeuver."

 

"Can I go now?" asked RIker

 

before entering Holosuite 1 for passionate

 

fondling of holographic Troi's large plump

 

meatballs.

"Mmm...cover them in

 

gravy. What! No gravy?!" Riker was

 

outmaneuvered. "No gravy for you, tonight!"