LeahBoBo
God, where to start.
First, I do want Sam to be beating himself over his head for what he has done (even stated that I want that to continue), in fact I love the fact that out of the last 7 episodes every single one of them in some form or another has Sam addressing these issues and or (mostly and) having someone else not letting him forget it either, both in nice and not so nice ways.
Nor am I stating that I want equal representation in number of episodes that are shown in dealing with an issue. For example, lets use Sam grieving for his Dad. Basically we got one episode of that (something the producers themselves admit they should have had done more with, but other story elements kept preventing that). But in that episode we got to see Sam process that. From him unconsciously jumping into the family business and doing what he thought Dad would want, to Dean tearing him a new one about it. No moments of him reflecting upon that, before he admitted that Dean was right, and he was trying to make up for all the lost time he had with his father. Sure it was all in one episode, but we saw the process.
As for Sam's motivation, yes they got tempered by power and addiction. But his primary motivations were their long before that addiction was. Remember he stopped his activities for what should have been months. But it was hearing that Dean saw only an early death for both of them that made him start back up.
But you are right I didn't fully say Sam's motivations (I thought two main parts were fairly understood). Sam felt a huge amount of regret in not being able to stop Dean from going to hell, and that he new he didn't do everything in his power to try and prevent it (for one he never tried to harness his abilities, due to Dean's reaction to them). He was filled with utter hatred for Lilith for harming Dean (compounded when he discovered what had actually happened to Dean in hell), those we're his first two motivations, then it was added having to keep Dean alive (as he clearly wasn't going to be able to stop Lilith), and making sure to stop the End of Days. Addiction didn't come into the equation until the latter half of the season. Hell he was strong enough to stop Samhein (a very powerful demon) and quit called turkey without any problems.
While I do agree that I didn't exactly buy Sam reason for trusting Ruby, the simply truth of the matter is that out of all the demon's or angels they meet (up until her betrayal of course), Ruby was never caught lying, never caught working for her own agenda, ect. She was the only one. For long over a year, Ruby on the service was being trust worthy. Sam is seeing Angel's who he believes are ultimate good (after all he was the believer, not Dean), and seeing them lie and kill and manipulate. And knowing that their are exceptions to everything (even if they are rare), it is certainly understandable that he would open up some what to her. Though even to the bitter end he never fully trusted her (otherwise wise he wouldn't have been questioning her).
Nor do I think it needs to be Sam to make Dean confront his own actions, it could have been anyone in the know, or even completely internal. After all we have gotten episodes that do deeply look at the characters inner view of what they are doing (When the leeves break, and What is and what should never be are great examples, or even In My Time of Dying and Mystery Spot).
And yes I do know that Dean has dealt with issues concerning his deal, his change in hell, breaking the first seal (in fact I use those of examples of how the show has shown character growth in a good, realistic way tv wise). And while this is certainly all connected. But I can't think of a single time that a major moment for Dean (or even Sam) when a character is told something or confronted over something major and after a brief fight, says look I know I am guilt of some of these same things. Never. And while Dean has been through hell (literally) that part of his character never really has been shown to change.
Like I said in my first post about this subject, I like the fact that the material is out there (that it was mentioned), I hate the fact that we have this great actor (in my opinion he is the best of any of the stars of this show, Sorry Jared, Misha, Katie, and Lauren and better then almost all the guests and reoccurring actors on this show) and he gets his character. I just feel that we the audience didn't get to see him come to that realization.
I also have stated (not in this thread, but one of the last two episodes), that so far this season feels really rushed to me. And not just in the fact that, events might be spirally out of control for these two faster and faster. But that the writers are putting two much material in each episode (I think Dean in the future was the only episode that seem just about right in that manner).
Since for myself this show is all about the two characters, I really don't care that much about the mythology or the monsters of the week (I don't dislike them, they just aren't what draws me to the show). So for me losing a big character moment is a huge blow to an episode.
And because of that fact, is really the only reason I have been harping on this issue.
Its the reason why I have complained about Dean's reaction to Castiel. Dean doesn't need to know everything Castiel has done (just as Sam may never tell Dean about the women he deliberately tortured to death, and Dean may never tell Sam the details of all the horrors he went through in hell), but I just can't see him blindly not understanding that Castiel isn't a true friend. I can understand Dean working with him and being social, but not being a friend. He knows for fact that Castiel is doing what he is doing for his own reasons, and not Deans. That if Castiel felt God wanted something, Castiel would do that, no questions asked.
Its those character beats that, just annoy the hell out of me........
She had to "shush" them because they were getting all hostile about the Dean vs. Sam who apologizes more argument. God, that's embarrassing. Why is there such a psychotic element to this fandom? 
That's Romo Lampkin from Battlestar. I love that guy. Crowley's supposed to be some slick, nasty demon. I can't wait.
