Star Trek XI Caption Contest #14: Wee Problems

[Rat Boy]

No need to rush off, because it's time for another caption contest. But first, let's hand out assignments to...

For not believing in the no-win delivery, our winner is...

Winona: "Why are we having so much trouble with this delivery!"
Doctor: "I don't know! It's...it's almost like your baby is trying to change the rules!"

And for being psychic, our winner is...

McGillion: "Be careful to make sure the fans don't like you too much. Otherwise, Abrams'll kill you off."

For taking the path of least resistance, our winner is...

Spock: I am now your Captain!

Kirk: Your mom's dead.

Spock cries and leaves Bridge

Kirk: That was easier than I thought.

And our Photoshop winner shows that some people will do anything to get into the new movies...

KIRK: We're looking for some old guy. Chanko? Cherpov?

Congratulations to the winners. First up this round, Spock Prime realizes that he's parked in a handicapped spot two seconds too late. Second, Scotty discovers exactly where he beamed Admiral Archer's prized beagle. And finally, Deep Roy's just glad the fans didn't turn on Keenser like Star Wars fans did to the Ewoks. Have at it and see you all in three weeks:

 

[Rat Boy]

Nero: "I'm going to destroy your planet and gloat!"

Spock Prime: "Your wife's still dead, dumbass."

Scotty: "I can't believe I pulled that beam off!"

Kirk: "And I can't believe you did it with that damn thing in your eye."

Scotty (off camera): "Get tae! Stop upperdecking the captain's toilet!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTTY: Keenser, run!!! The dog's back and he's pissed!!!!

KEENSER: I know, I know!

PORTHOS: grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Welcome back Ratboy!!

Scotty: Well MY boobs certainly feel firmer!

 

[Rat Boy]

Nero: "No, seriously, do you know the way to San Jose? That's where we plan on dropping the red matter bomb. Stop laughing!"

 

[Deranged Nasat]

Nero: "Spock, my Vulcan brother. Welcome. Much has changed in your absence. My dreams of vengeance are spent. The truth of god's universe has been revealed to me. For too long the bitterness and the pain ate away at my soul. Until I prayed, prayed and understood the joy of every raindrop, every light mist, and every moment of silence. My men and I formed the brotherhood. We greet you, Spock...in peace"

*Stunned Silence*

Nero: "......AHAHAHAAAAHHAAAA! Oh, man, that was good! We really had you going there! Heh, heh. Nah, we're still mad- we're gonna frag Vulcan".

 

[Aragorn]

William Bell was shocked to see what had become of alternate universe David Banner.

 

[Deranged Nasat]

Keenser: "I'm a small and irritating sidekick, yet I pity you. Funny how that works out, isn't it?"

 

[bullethead]

Aiel: You sure you're not overreacting? He's just one man.
Nero: He's 155, served with James T. Kirk, is incredibly smart, and came back from the dead. If anything, we need more people with guns.

Scotty: So he was like "relativistic gentrification," "orbital mitosis," and "simian beta decay," then I said, "You're lying. None of that makes any sense."
Kirk: I wanted to know if the transporter is working.
Scotty: That thing? It's fine as long as you don't try to beam up during an ion storm.

The OHSA representative sent to the Enterprise was dismayed to find that resembled a 20th century brewery more than a ship's engine room.

 

[Rat Boy]

Keenser: "Christ, I can't take this anymore. I confess, Scotty; I was the one who ate Admiral Archer's prized beagle."

 

[Woulfe]

Why Star Trek Is Better Then Star Wars Part XI....

1. No boring political speeches.....

Nero : Hello Spock, I'm going to destroy Vulcan & make you watch.....

2. No techno-babble-mumbo-jumbo

Scotty : I got the transporter working correctly.

3. No Jar-Jar Binks.....

Well, 2 outta 3 ain't bad

 

[mari]

I knew I should'a taken that left turn at Albuquerque...

 

[Vassa]

Scotty: ...and I'm pretty handy in a zombie attack as well!

Spock: You got all this from McCoy's communicator?!?

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Thankfully Romulan mining ships were a lens flare free zone.

 

[cooleddie74]

SPOCK: Would this be a bad time for a colorful metaphor?

SCOTTY: When ye're bloody done with this Nero fellow, anyone wanna join me for some online FPS gaming?

I have two extra headsets, lads!!

KEENSER: This ISN'T a toilet?


Uh-OH.

 

[cooleddie74]

NERO: You left without your door prize.

Here...just a little something Ayel and I thought you'd like.

 

[Nero's Shadow]

Scotty SHIT I,VE BEAMED ON THAT ZOMBIE AND THAT SUPERMARKET MANAGER FROM HOT FUZZ CRICKET BATS ON STUN REDSHIRTS !!!!

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: Klaatu barada nikto

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

]

Nero: Your Facebook profile said you were a 22-year-old Vulcan priestess!
Spock Prime: I exaggerated.

Scotty: Who da man! Who da man! (lower) Okay, guess I'm not doing that again.

Keenser: Do or do not. There is no try.

 

[LeadHead]

Thanks for the Win!

Nimoy: That's it! I'm definitely not doing anymore Conventions!

Scotty: Did you want me to beam Your Dads secret treasure that he kept on that shuttle? Oh, too late.

Keenser: Did anybody else have to get their uniforms at a Halloween Store?