The unlikable Vulcans weren't so different than the ones in TOS (other than Spock). They merely played up the unsavory aspects. But another way some people showed hostility to the new was the complaints that the ENT crew wasn't as seasoned as TNG. Well, it's the first time a crew has gone to deep space, of course they're going to be naïve and a little bumbling.
I wasn't addressing your main point at all but on that, I think you give TPTB too much credit. They wanted to downplay the prequel aspect and put ENT out right away when Bermaga begged them to wait. If UPN really cared, we wouldn't have got the TCW in the first place. Then they wondered why the ratings weren't so good. Based on the Blu-ray interviews, I conclude that UPN didn't know what they wanted or what they were doing.
Just curious, how long did you watch? But even in the beginning, the appeal of Trip/T'Pol to shippers was because their personalities are so different. If you didn't see that, I can't help you.