Seriously? Do gays have a different demeanor?
You don't have Gaydar?
Only when it involves protecting my cornhole...
That's beyond tacky. It makes it sound like gay men are sexual predators after your precious tuckus.
As to "gaydar", people give off all kinds of behavioral clues as to their orientation. Some are simply fashion cues (wearing the "uniform" of a given group), others are behavioral and language (people pick up the speaking style, slang and some mannerisms from their social groups). Finally, there's what I call the "eye thing". When you see someone on the street or wherever, you glance at them, but a straight guy will typically immediately look away from another guy (nothing interesting there), but their gaze will probably linger a fraction of a second longer on a woman, and, if it's a woman he finds attractive, he'll "scan" her (the old look you up and down). It's that little extra moment of lingering eye contact that's often the tip-off. Doesn't mean you want to have sex with them, it just means your reptile brain is doing a "possible mate or not?" assessment.
Finally, as to if coming out is hard...guess what,
it IS hard. Many people are still rejected by family and friends whenthey come out. Hell,
some studies indicate it might even affect your likelihood of getting a job interview. In some communities it's worse than others. Yes, it's been getting easier in recent years, but that doesn't make it EASY. Until you realize the casualness with which a lot of people still make rude remarks about gay people and gay sex (^^^"cornhole"), and that people still get beat up for being or being perceived to be gay (even here in liberal San Francisco), you have no idea how tough it is to come out.