Movie Caption Contest #57: Prisoners of the Moment

[Rat Boy]

Push, push! That's it, it's out, so it's time for a new caption contest. Here are last week's winners:

Crewman G'Narly, frantic: "Is there a goddamned bathroom on this ship?"

With Deanna on the Titan with Wil, our good Captain Picard only had one course of action for when Lwaxanna came aboard for her biannual visit to the Enterprise.

And the Photoshop winner:

Couldn't find the correct image, but this looked just as funny...

"You guys are stupid. They're gonna be looking for army people"

Congratulations to the winners and here's the updated list of them:

Nerys Myk (Hall of Fame) 30
Year of Hell (Hall of Fame) 27
cooleddie74 (Hall of Fame) 21
Gertch 17
The Laughing Vulcan 15
Shatmandu 14
Outpost4 13
scottydog 9
Nebusj 9
BriGuy 9
EliyahuQeoni 9
Turd Ferguson 9
Diesel Micky Dolenz 9
Triskelion 9
Kegek 8
cultcross 7
zephramac 7
DS9Sega 6
Tharpdevenport 6
John_Picard 5
SciFi75 5
middyseafort 5
CaptainJon 4
Haggis and Tatties 4
Skywalker 4
The Cutest of Borg 4
NCC-1701 4
Defcon 4
Kirby 4
LeadHead 4
Finn 4
Sisu 3
David_Leese 3
archerguy1701 3
Starpaul20 3
ancient 3
chancellorjake 3
jptrekker 3
Bad Atom 3
J. Allen 2
Arthur Frelling Dent 2
SeerSGB 2
Lloyd_Dobbler 2
Peach Wookie 2
nil_jones 2
OphaClyde 2
cardinal biggles 1
Vasquez Rocks 1
Valin 1
Nathan_Heller 1
Guartho 1
Alyssa 1
A beaker full of death 1
rmkwebdesign 1
Starlock 1
Redshirts Widow 1
Admiral Garak 1
Broccoli 1
Mister.Woof 1
The Squire of Gothos 1
A Chimpanzee & 2 Trainees 1
battrekker 1
DrBob 1
Sector7 1
USS Mariner 1
hmbnimbus 1
S'Kai 1
H F Mudd 1
dukesman 1
Fire 1
Super Grover 1
Herkimer Jitty 1
Atavachron 1

This week, we revisit the old Trek cliche of our heroes getting captured by the villains. I mean, jeez, these guys spend more time in custody than your average NFL wide receiver. Enjoy:

 

[Rat Boy]

Klingon: "I'm not going to kill you; I'm just going to make your hair look more like Kirstie Alley's."

Doherty: "Are you sure you beamed them up from an orgy? They all have their clothes on."

 

[PhoenixIreland]

Doherty: "Listen Frakes, this has to stop, this movie is probably gonna beat Star Trek V for the worst Star Trek movie of all time, I mean, a planet of people who are identical to humans, who hold the fountain of youth attacked by aliens also identical to humans but with stretchy faces and a vanity problem....SERIOUSLY......"

Frakes: "we could spice it up a bit....say by killing your character off in a cunning stretchy face accident"

Stewart: "oh god it just gets worse...."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Klingon 1: "We Klingons are at the cutting edge you know? I'll make sure you get my point, not so sharp now are..."

Nimoy: "Cut! Cut! What the hell is that!"

Klingon 1: "I was thinking a James Bond vibe..."

Zerbe: "I don't have to do this shit you know. I was lead kidnapper in the Red Hand Gang!"

 

[Gertch]

"No. This is a knife."

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Spock (thinking): "I am SO not going to wait 7 years to do her again!"

Doherty: "Ensign, when I said I wished I'd seen the Village People live, this wasn't what I meant."

 

[John Picard]

Doherty: "Thank you all for coming this evening. I'm here to talk to you about a fabulous product and an opportunity that will change your lives. In the world of AmWay..."

*collective groan*

 

[scottydog]

Doherty: "Why is everyone staring at me? Haven't they seen a man urinate before?"

 

[scottydog]

Woman: "The statue of liberty! The knife attack in Psycho!"

Spock: "I hate playing charades."

 

[cooleddie74]

DAVID:"Do you expect us to talk?"

KLINGON:"No, scrawny Earther...

I expect you to DIE.

Then leave a gaping hole in Admiral Kirk's backstory that never fully gets explained or resolved, leading to a plethora of really bad fanfic for the next twenty years."

DOUGHERTY:"Want these people to cooperate and stay quiet?

Show them my performance in that James Bond movie I did. That'll shut 'em up 'til we get to their new homeworld."

 

[cooleddie74]

TEENAGED SPOCK:"You call yourself an honorable warrior and soldier for your Empire...

but wear KISS boots?"

 

[The Cutest of Borg]

Zerbe: "Wait, I'm confused. Are we doing Star Trek or West Side Story?"

 

[Haggis and tatties]

KLINGON:"SAY Enterprise is canon one more time!!!

Picard" You know if you don't press a button the doors wont close and people will continue to come in"

 

[zephramc]

David Marcus: Wait, kill me instead!
Saavik: Yes, kill him instead!

Dougherty (whispering): That guy to the left of Picard... no your other left... is that captain Kirk?

 

[Candlelight]

"You're right, the knife is sharper than my ears."

Suddenly Dougherty went blurry.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Saavik: It is essential that you hurry; we only have a few more minutes before he reaches his second Pon Farr.
Klingon: But I'm not quite sure how to circumcise a bifurcated penis.

Picard: Really, Admiral, did you think you'd get away with this?
Dougherty: Well, I would've if it hadn't been for you kids and your pesky android!

 

[Nerys Myk]

DOUGHERTY: We should have those tables cleared and ready for your party very shortly Mr Picard. Can I get you something from the bar?

 

[Nerys Myk]

TEENAGED SPOCK: This is soooo boring!!! When are we going home?

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Klingon; "Yeah its just an eyelash. Hold still and I'll get it..."

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Saavik: It is essential that you hurry; we only have a few more minutes before he reaches his second Pon Farr.
Klingon: But I'm not quite sure how to circumcise a bifurcated penis

Luckily, the D'k tahg has an attachment just for that