Movie Caption Contest #167: Nice Planet

[Rat Boy]

The little ships may be broken, but it's time for another caption contest. Let's set a course for...

I'd personally like to see a study done to see if GPS' and controlling passengers contribute to road rage...

Computer: The ship is no longer on any known space route. Make a U-turn at the earliest legal opportunity. The ship is no longer on any known space route. Make a ...
Picard, to Riker: I don't know which is worse, that damned thing or your girlfriend, telling me she 'senses my confusion'

I'm sensing a trend...

Picard: But what do the Borg want?
Troi: To assimilate Earth's past and prevent first contact?
Riker: Captain, what if they wanted to assimilate Earth's past and prevent first contact?
Picard: Very good number one, now what about the Borg on the deflector screen?
Troi: Suit up, undo the magnetic clamps and release the dish.
Data: Sir, may I suggest we suit up, undo the magnetic clamps and release the dish.
Picard: Excellent, make it so.
Troi: <sigh>

Yeah, this could take a while...

LILY: This one isnt the NX-01 either.

Congratulations to the winners. This week, Troi senses something, Data gets the feeling he's being ignored, and Troi senses something else. Enjoy:

 

[Rat Boy]

Troi: "They're..."

Picard: "...all young and attractive. Do you know what this means?"

*Troi shakes her head*

Picard: "We've beamed onto a CW television show!"

Data: "I may not have the emotion chip, but that does not mean I appreciate being ignored!"

Crusher: "Really? You and Will again?"

Troi: "Is that jealousy I'm sensing, Doctor 'Jean-Luc, I have something to tell you?'"

 

[cooleddie74]

TROI: Oh, no.

We've wandered into the middle of a Renaissance Fair!

PICARD: Emergency beamout...NOW!!!!

DATA: Sir!

Over here!

BIGFOOT SCAT!!!

BEVERLY: Deanna...let me ask you a question.

DEANNA: Sure!

BEVERLY: Do you ever get that...

oh, I dunno...

that...NOT-so-24th Century feeling?

 

[cooleddie74]

TROI: They have amazing powers, sir!

Intense mental discipline...powers of perception...


And they can program a VCR so it stops blinking "12:00"!

PICARD: Dear Heavens...

 

[Candlelight]

Troi: "Can't believe how sickening this has gotten"
Picard: "I know... the retards we assigned to the duck blind will be shot for this"
Lieutenant in back: "Fuck"

Data was going to wait for the right moment to interrupt the wedding party and declare his love for Jean Luc.

Crusher: "My penis is really firming up"

 

[Nerys Myk]

EXTRA: (thinking) I hope Rat Boy chooses this shot for a caption contest.

DATA: The Love Boat has been canceled. All B level actors and hasbeens should return to their homes! I repeat the Love Boat has been canceled!!!!

CRUSHER: We should probably hit the Port A Potty before the line gets too long.

 

[cooleddie74]

DATA: Please, sir...do not urinate into the lake!!


It will set off a chemical chain reaction that could kill us all!!

BEVERLY: My boobs have really firmed up. And for some reason, they also taste better.

 

[Itisnotlogical]

Data was planning to speak to the Union about this blatant act of anti-androidism.

Beverly: "Huh, this picture could strike some perverted fanboys as being very suggestive. I hope nobody makes lewd comments about us!"

 

[cooleddie74]

DATA: Fine.

Ignore me.

I will be over here...giving you all my servo-driven, extended middle finger.

BEVERLY: Try not to let Will get to you, Deanna.

After all, it's his time of the month.

Trombone Recital!

 

[Candlelight]

Troi: "Yup, just playing with straw here, why do you ask?"

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Troi: "Captain, I'm sensing, from somewhere very close...intense jealousy. And something about...'young strumpet' and 'old coot doesn't have a clue about who's really right for him.'"

Picard: "I dunno, maybe Data's right. Now that I get a closer look, that pier does look pretty damned rickety!"

Picard (OS): "Beverly, Deanna, would you two mind sitting farther apart from each other? I mean...you're practically asking for another 'two girls one cup' caption."

 

[bullethead]

Troi: Is that... Robert Carlyle?
Picard: Yes... Stargate Universe must be filming here. If we move quickly, we can take potshots at them from the hills.

Data never could understand why people insisted on waiting by the pier whenever he went crabbing.

Crusher: So, like I was saying, this guy was hitting on me and...
Troi: Thank god I smoked some of that Romulan marijuana before listening to another one of her spiels...

 

[Candlelight]

Data: "Captain, I have successfully drained some of the water from lake to expose the holoship. I have also lowered the land in order for the pier to appear the same height as normal. I am only mentioning this as to explain the continuity error the fans are about to see"
Picard (shouting): "Geek"
Data: "Screw you sir."

Data: "Captain, we can enter the lake, as I am capable as acting as a life preserver in an emergency."
Picard: "Then why did you tell Geordi in Descent Pt 2 you sank to the bottom of an ocean and had to walk for a kilometre underwater?"
Data: "Screw you sir."

Troi: "So yeah... kissing him with a beard was strange. Never done it before."
Crusher: "You kissed Riker with a beard in Menage A Troi during the third season, amongst others."
Troi: "Screw you tough tits."

 

[Smellincoffee]

Picard: Ah. Will. Impressive. Troi told us you'd shaved. But we do have a uniform code, and--
Troi: I meant his beard, sir.

Data knew something terrible had transpired on the surface when he spotted the away team lining up to be baptized by the Baku.

Troi earnestly hoped for any one to come along and rescue her from Crusher's constant chatter about Wesley. She'd even settle for Data attempting -- poorly -- to tell an awkward joke.

 

[Captain Crow]

Data: Oh, so you guys don't want Data near your rickety pier, huh? Fine, I'll go build my own rickety pier... with blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the rickety pier and the blackjack!

 

[Isis]

<Insert lame Gilligan's Island, Fantasy Island, or Lost joke here>

 

[Isis]

Crusher: "Boobs, schmoobs. What I could use from this planet is a decent hair color."

 

[Rat Boy]

Data: "Wait, Locke put explosives in the submarine!"

 

[Candlelight]

Picard: "Does the Briar Patch surround this planet like a ring or sphere?"
Troi: "I don't think so?"
Picard: "So why didn't we come in from the other side? And we haven't seen a sun yet, why is it so feckin' bright??"
Troi: "Time of the month?"
Picard: "FUCK YOU"

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Crusher: OHMYGOD SOMEONE SWITCHED MY EYEDROPS WITH GLUE!!!!!!!!

Troi: *whistles*