'Knee-deep in the hoopla' and other horrible song lyrics

[Velocity]

There are no bad lyrics like classic bad lyrics. For the edification of the young'uns, here are the Top Five Worst Song Lyrics of All Time:

5. Afternoon Delight. Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite/ looking forward to a little afternoon delight/ Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite/ and the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting.

Gee, I always thought they said, "the thought of LOVIN' you". Catchy tune, though.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

How can we have a thread about horrible lyrics without once mentioning Shirley Ellis?

Those are called fun lyrics.

Still horrible, IMHO.

Go ahead, try and tell me that "The Name Game" isn't so bad that it makes Data's poetry look good.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

The Cocteau Twins had the advantage of lyrics no one could even understand.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

The Cocteau Twins had the advantage of lyrics no one could even understand.

Too right.

Both for that reason, and the utter beauty of Liz Fraser's voice. Somehow I think she wouldn't sound quite as captivating if her lyrics weren't as...otherworldly. (Although I do like the Christmas carols they did, where you actually can clearly understand every word.)

 

[scotpens]

Afternoon Delight. Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite/ looking forward to a little afternoon delight/ Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite/ and the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting.

Gee, I always thought they said, "the thought of LOVIN' you". Catchy tune, though.

I believe they recorded two versions -- the “cleaner” one for more conservative radio markets.

Either way, the song sucks.

 

[SPOCKED]

Let us not forget the immortal Paper Lace:

When a man named Al Capone
Tried to make that town his own
And he called his gang to war
With the forces of the law

moral - never ever use Al Capone in R&R lyrics

Also all the lyrics ever penned by John Cougar