TOS was never supposed to be utopian. It showed a future that worked, that was better than today, but people were still struggling and feuding and trying to make a go of it on the final frontier. It was a positive vision of the future, as opposed to all the post-apocalyptic dystopias out there, but people still fought and argued and had their hearts broken . . .
The new movie felt like TOS to me. You have people from different planets and cultures united in a commmon Federation. It's not a post-atomic wasteland, the apes and the killer robots haven't taken over, Big Brother is not watching.
It's a future that works, but not one without problems or disagreement.
Just like the original series.
(But, yeah, the lack of gay characters in TREK has been embarrassing for years. Hell, even sitcoms have gay characters these days, but TREK keeps pussyfooting around the issue.)