If you were an alien race how would you take over Earth?

Discussion in 'Science Fiction & Fantasy' started by Tetragrammaton Invictus, Nov 29, 2017.

  1. psCargile

    psCargile Captain Captain

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    Go back in time to hack voting machines for a Clinton win, then sit back and wait a few months.

    Hehehe.
     
  2. Serveaux

    Serveaux The Wind Premium Member

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    They did that already, but penciled in the other candidate instead.

    The plan is proceeding excellently.
     
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  3. Jedi Marso

    Jedi Marso Commodore Commodore

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    As others have said, it depends on what you want. Another easy solution to thin the population and wreck human civilization is to pop a bunch of EMP's over all the industrialized nations, and then let Darwin do his work. A year later the population will be about 10% of what you started with, and they'll be pre-occupied trying to re-learn the tricks to living in an agrarian, 18th-19th Century style world.
     
  4. JD

    JD Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    We would probably subtlely infiltrate humanity, and manipulate things to get whatever our end goal is. If we want to take control of the planet and rule over humanity, we'd get an agent into the government of the US. If we want a slave race we'd kidnap a few people here and there and ship them off world. If we want the planet's resources we'd either introduce a virus that would wipe out humanity, or if we're in a hurry and don't need the current environment to survive then we'd just blast humanity into oblivion.

    I know people are joking about Trump being an alien agent, but I'd like to think they wouldn't be that obvious. Instead of putting a clueless moron who half the people hate into power, I would think it would be smarter to actually put an intelligent, charming person who the vast majority love and will eagerly follow into power.
     
  5. Leviathan

    Leviathan Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    Overpopulate some, fatten a small portion up. When ready, heat planet and cook to perfection. Lots of tasty snacks, with a few fatty treats.
     
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  6. Locutus of Bored

    Locutus of Bored Capital-T Thanos Fieri Moderator

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    Phase 1 - Quietly abduct individuals from all over the world to build up a comprehensive genetic sample. Develop a highly contagious but initially non-symptomatic blood-borne / insect-borne / contact / airborne human-targeting virus that remains dormant for nearly a year as they travel around spreading the virus around the globe, but once it activates it kills with a 99%+ mortality rate in less than 24 hours. Introduce it at multiple points around the world for maximum effect.
    Phase 2 - ???
    Phase 3 - Profit
     
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  7. JD

    JD Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Viruses definitely seem to be the most popular method to wipe out humanity, even I went for one.
     
  8. LJones41

    LJones41 Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    How do you think Humans would take over an alien race?
     
  9. Nyotarules

    Nyotarules Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Disney....
     
  10. tharpdevenport

    tharpdevenport Admiral Admiral

    Well, the initial proposition is pre-disposed to the idea aliens want to take over Earth. That isn't necessarily going to be the case. But even if they do have hostile intents, they don't necessarily have to take it over. We could just be under their thumb with the threat of war or planetary destruction and do what ever their bidding is; it would take minimal effort on their part; hell, no aliens may need to be posted on Earth -- just an occasional visits with punishments.
    And, as the old jokes goes, there will be people all over the world that will welcome our evil new overlords, 'cause they're the same people now who think if they just be nice and generous to the evil people running countries around the world, it'll be okay.
     
  11. φ of π

    φ of π Captain Captain

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    Detonate a biogenic pathogen in Earth's atmosphere that seemed completely benign and utterly harmless. People wouldn't even know it existed because there would be no symptoms or other discernible effects.

    The clever part is that any children concieved after exposure to the pathogen would be born infertile. Everyone else from already-fertilized zygote to adults ect. would be immune to the effects and thus have no reason to suspect anything.

    In fact, nobody would suspect anything was wrong at all until after a couple of decades later...

    100 years later: Hello brave new (and empty) world.
     
  12. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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  13. MacLeod

    MacLeod Admiral Admiral

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    Nukes are so last year, but I agree with the sentiment.
     
  14. The Borgified Corpse

    The Borgified Corpse Admiral Admiral

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    Ouch! Forgotten already? You were just down ther
    STEP 1: Get rid of that British weirdo in the blue phone box. He ruins everything!

    Also, if we encounter any opposition, just shoot them now rather than waiting until I've been able to finish my lengthy monologue about why I'm going to shoot them.

    Find out what my ONE WEAKNESS is and then make damn sure that no one else finds out about it!

    Place a massive bounty on all charming smugglers, idealistic farm boys, muscle-bound silent types, and pretty much anyone with any sass at all.

    Ahh, yes. I remember that episode. It showed us how we narrowly avoided that terrible fate in the far off year of 2010! Also reminds me of 1999 when the entire island of Manhattan was turned into a maximum security prison. (BTW, I was checking Wikipedia recently and it turns out that Rollerball is happening right now!!!!!)

    Although, I suppose if I were conquering Earth for myself, I'd go with something akin to Woody Allen's plan from Casino Royale: Use biological warfare to make all women beautiful and kill all men over 4-foot-6. :D
     
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  15. Asbo Zaprudder

    Asbo Zaprudder Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Use mind control to get Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc. invented and stand well back.
     
  16. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Vice Admiral Admiral

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    If aliens took over Earth I honestly think they would do it economically. Why commit the resources to enslaving a race when they will give over their freedom voluntarily for some nifty futuristic trinkets?

    Trump isn't an alien agent. If aliens wanted to take over Earth, wouldn't they want the ecosystem intact?
     
  17. MacLeod

    MacLeod Admiral Admiral

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    Well doesn't that kind of depend on what ecosystem they need
     
  18. Markonian

    Markonian Commodore Commodore

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    As a native German, I like to see the European Union as a peaceful takeover, after the previous two attempts (plus Napoleon’s, RIP) failed.

    As such, I’d favor infiltration and courting if I was representative of an alien government with hegemonic intent. The primary element to prevent future riots and pesky independence movements - this is what the Brits got terribly wrong - is to respect and nurture the native’s culture. Embrace diversity, and they will celebrate your rule. Kind of like the Humans dominate the otherwise egalitarian Federation.
     
  19. Pondwater

    Pondwater Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    I’d have no interest in Earth, too primitive.
     
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  20. urbandefault

    urbandefault Commodore Commodore

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    Free Netflix & unlimited data.