I'm riding some pretty strong emotional waves at the moment, because I've finally made a breakthrough regarding a long-standing medical problem. I've been given some reasonably extensive information on Fibromyalgia, which it's now believed I most likely suffer from. It's a condition I had somehow never heard of but which fits perfectly the various physical difficulties I've been having since my mid-teens.
For some years now, I've experienced feelings akin to ongoing electric shocks; stabbing pains, throbbing "pins and needles" sensations across my entire body, the feeling that I'm "heavy" or clogged up with electricity, apparent stiffness and joint pains, ultrasensitivity to external stimuli. A sense that my body's on fire, or that there's a "tightness" in my neck or head, like a vice. These weren't constant, but came and went. I recognized certain patterns - activities that would set it off, after which I'd slowly recover over a period of days to weeks, then feel fine until the next incident. Said incidents, though, became more common and more serious over time. It often makes it very hard for me to function normally. In addition to the aches and pains, there's fatigue, a general exhaustion that isn't improved by sleep and which strikes regardless of how little physical exertion I've been doing, there's also an inability to concentrate or think clearly, as if my mind is "foggy". The most frustrating thing is that according to all medical tests I was - and am - in absolutely perfect physical health; there was no clear explanation for what was happening, and the question I had to keep asking was "if I'm in such great health, how and why am I feeling so terrible?"
Fibromyalgia has the answers, apparently. What's also interesting is that it's very often comorbid with psychological conditions like depression (which I was diagnosed with) and PTSD (which it's been suggested I might have), and one of the theories regarding its cause is stressful conditions in childhood or adolescence, conditions that also encourage the manifestation of psychological problems. I've been getting help of late with the possibility or probability that my depression/psychological concerns are a form of bipolar, and so this is rather interesting, because stressful conditions earlier in life is thought to be one of the bigger risk factors for that, too.
It's been frustrating these last few years, both not having answers for what was happening to me and finding myself distracted from either my physical or mental problems by interference from the other. Now, though, I feel as if I've finally got a sense of the overall picture, and can start coming to grips with both. I have a name and an explanation of sorts for my physical concerns and I'm learning to understand the psychological ones. As some of you might remember, not too long ago I realize something I'd forgotten - that my life was worth living and enjoying. Facing the conditions that make it difficult for me to live up to that knowledge has caused some frustration of late, but I'm hoping that this is another positive step towards reclaiming myself.
Anyhow, thanks for reading.
For some years now, I've experienced feelings akin to ongoing electric shocks; stabbing pains, throbbing "pins and needles" sensations across my entire body, the feeling that I'm "heavy" or clogged up with electricity, apparent stiffness and joint pains, ultrasensitivity to external stimuli. A sense that my body's on fire, or that there's a "tightness" in my neck or head, like a vice. These weren't constant, but came and went. I recognized certain patterns - activities that would set it off, after which I'd slowly recover over a period of days to weeks, then feel fine until the next incident. Said incidents, though, became more common and more serious over time. It often makes it very hard for me to function normally. In addition to the aches and pains, there's fatigue, a general exhaustion that isn't improved by sleep and which strikes regardless of how little physical exertion I've been doing, there's also an inability to concentrate or think clearly, as if my mind is "foggy". The most frustrating thing is that according to all medical tests I was - and am - in absolutely perfect physical health; there was no clear explanation for what was happening, and the question I had to keep asking was "if I'm in such great health, how and why am I feeling so terrible?"
Fibromyalgia has the answers, apparently. What's also interesting is that it's very often comorbid with psychological conditions like depression (which I was diagnosed with) and PTSD (which it's been suggested I might have), and one of the theories regarding its cause is stressful conditions in childhood or adolescence, conditions that also encourage the manifestation of psychological problems. I've been getting help of late with the possibility or probability that my depression/psychological concerns are a form of bipolar, and so this is rather interesting, because stressful conditions earlier in life is thought to be one of the bigger risk factors for that, too.
It's been frustrating these last few years, both not having answers for what was happening to me and finding myself distracted from either my physical or mental problems by interference from the other. Now, though, I feel as if I've finally got a sense of the overall picture, and can start coming to grips with both. I have a name and an explanation of sorts for my physical concerns and I'm learning to understand the psychological ones. As some of you might remember, not too long ago I realize something I'd forgotten - that my life was worth living and enjoying. Facing the conditions that make it difficult for me to live up to that knowledge has caused some frustration of late, but I'm hoping that this is another positive step towards reclaiming myself.
Anyhow, thanks for reading.
