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Facts About Captain Robau

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Robau killed the real Zoe Saldana for being too ugly. They had to hold Robau at bay while they quickly re-shot Zoe's scenes using a stunt double, who was also killed for being too ugly.
 
It was Robau who advised Rahm Emmanuel to leave his post to run in Chicago. Something about Washington, D.C., being too stable for his kind of bad-a--ery....
 
The Destiny's destiny is to reunite with its true captain, Captain Robau, so that it may fairy him across the universe to kick the asses of humans and aliens everywhere.
 
Robau killed the real Zoe Saldana for being too ugly. They had to hold Robau at bay while they quickly re-shot Zoe's scenes using a stunt double, who was also killed for being too ugly.

THIS FACT ANGERS ROBAU!!!

Captain Robau actually finds Zoe Saldana incredibly [highlight]hot[/highlight].

ZoeSaldana.jpg


:adore: :drool:
 
^While he also saves a bus load of schoolchildren from terrorists using only his left foot.

Robau is extremely good at multitasking.
 
Robau can get away with continuing to make humorous references involving movies like Snakes on a Plane and The Forty-Year-Old Virgin.
 
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