Facts About Captain Robau

[F. King Daniel]

Captain Robau can win a game of chess in a single move. One so deadly it has been known to destroy entire villages with it's cunning.

Anyone else attempting to duplicate this chess move has died horribly.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Fear isn't the mind-killer OR the little-death that brings total obliteration.

Robau is.

 

[EnsignRicky]

Robau Framed Roger Rabbit

 

[barnaclelapse]

Robau remembers every single Real Ghostbusters toy commercial ever made.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

Robau can destroy entire armies with a single glare.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^ Whereas a Robau glare *is* an entire army.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau needs no army. He IS an army. Of one.

 

[Wynterhawk]

Starfleet is jealous of Robau's army of one. They'll never live up.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Most people can only hope to be all they can be. Robau does that three times before breakfast.

 

[6079SmithW]

Some say that beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. I say that it is proof that God did something to seriously piss off the Robau and had to create something awesome real quick in order to appease Robau and avert the Robau Rage.

 

[EnsignRicky]

Robau Shot First!!!

 

[Wynterhawk]

Did Robau shoot the sherriff?

 

[barnaclelapse]

Robau can scream louder than Sam Kinnison ever could.

 

[6079SmithW]

Kinnison was screaming because he knew that Robau was coming after him.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau does more before 6 a.m. than all the 6 a.m.'s in human history have ever accomplished TOGETHER.

 

[Skellington]

Robau does more before 6 a.m. than all the 6 a.m.'s in human history have ever accomplished TOGETHER.

Then he wakes up.
Sorry, had to.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau does more before 6 a.m. than all the 6 a.m.'s in human history have ever accomplished TOGETHER.

Then he wakes up.
Sorry, had to.

It's okay. Even Robau found that pretty funny.

 

[EnsignRicky]

Robau has in his possession four hecks, eleven damns, six craps, eighteen flying fraks, five darns, twelve hoots and one hairy rat's ass.

When he asks, people give.

 

[F. King Daniel]

Captain Robau blew up Krypton with a particularly harsh glare.

Captain Robau once had an orgy with Supergirl, Batgirl, G-girl, Wonder Woman and Catwoman. It lasted six months and nine days.

 

[6079SmithW]

When Robau goes fishing he doesn't even leave the house. The fish will flop up to his front door, go inside, flop into the frying pan and cook themselves for the honor of being eaten by Captain Robau.