Facts About Captain Robau

[KirkusOveractus]

Whooo! They made a video game about Robau, check it out: http://www.rubukaz.com/

I don't want to - it may fry my computer because it isn't badass enough to handle such a game.

How could you even simulate Robau anyway?

 

[Squiggy]

To pronounce Robau's name properly you don't have to remove your tongue, but Robau will do it anyway.

 

[rgb1701]

Captain Robau is the life of the party with his ventriloquism act- Robau sticks each arm up a Klingon's and Romulan's arse, moving their mouths with his hands.

The Romulan tells jokes while the Klingon sings opera, at the same time, while Robau drinks Romulan ale.

 

[Islander]

Robau once snorted bio mimetic gel on a dare.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau once snorted pure, uncut dilithium ASTEROID on a dare.

 

[Islander]

After that, he snorted some red matter. No dare, he's just badass like that.

 

[cooleddie74]

And the result?

A black hole in his nasal cavity from which no boogers can escape. Hence...no need for tissues.

 

[Islander]

And no need for toilet paper either cuz he has a bad ass. Get it? He's badass...he has a bad ass...ok, maybe not. I'll go google for something else, hold on.

 

[cooleddie74]

Captain Robau forgives your shitty pun.

Just BARELY.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

And no need for toilet paper either cuz he has a bad ass. Get it? He's badass...he has a bad ass...ok, maybe not. I'll go google for something else, hold on.

Hurry before Robau grows angered with you and destroys your soul.

 

[Islander]

I humbly thank the almighty Robau for his unending forgiveness. Let's pray together again:

Our Robau, who art in Star Trek
Hallowed be thy name
Thy starship come
Thy will be done
On earth as it is in the Galaxy
Give us this day our daily thread
And forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who prefer Star Wars
And lead us not into Orions
But deliver us from Canon
Amen

 

[KirkusOveractus]

Regarding that prayer, the only Orions Robau shall lead us into are the green and erotic kind, provided there is also good beer and pizza stocked within the same enclosure.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau eats Crunch Berries for the berries. And because Capn Crunch owes him a shitload of favors.

 

[Islander]

Regarding that prayer, the only Orions Robau shall lead us into are the green and erotic kind, provided there is also good beer and pizza stocked within the same enclosure.

Robau doesn't lead us into those Orions, he keeps them all for himself.

 

[Islander]

Regarding that prayer, the only Orions Robau shall lead us into are the green and erotic kind, provided there is also good beer and pizza stocked within the same enclosure.

Robau doesn't lead us into those Orions, he keeps them all for himself.

But he doesn't mind you watching...be careful not to stain the sofa with your pizza.

 

[rgb1701]

Hail Robau, full of badass, the kickass is with thee.

blessed art thou among men, and blessed is the fruit of thy seed, Robau.

Holy Robau, Father of God, pray for us losers, now and at the hands of our death. Amenhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hail_Mary#cite_note-6

 

[cooleddie74]

And on the third day, Robau created badassness. And all the creatures of the earth learned how to sneer and mack on the females of their kind.

 

[stonester1]

Yeah, though I fly through the Neutral Zone of the shadow of death,
Robau art with me.

Thy phaser and thy photons comfort me.

Thou prepare a table for me in the presence of Romulans

My cup runneth over with blue ale.

 

[Islander]

Spoiler: yo mama

Robau is doing her the greek way

 

[Jolantru]

Robau never had to take the Kobiashi Maru. The only no win scenario is when you have to face him.