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Facts About Captain Robau

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If you have five bars of gold pressed latinum and Captain Robau has five bars of gold pressed latinum, Captain Robau has more money than you.
 
Captain Robau once blew up the following just by looking at it.

- Klingon fleet.

- The Scimitar

- A Borg cube

- the Genesis planet

- half a galaxy

- and the Enterprise-D engineering hull.
 
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of species Captain Robau allows to live.
 
Captain Robau doesn't give orders. He says what's going to be done and the Great Bird HELP your sorry ass if you don't do it.
 
The secret behind the Genesis Device isn't proto-matter as it is popularly believed, but the preserved essence of Captian Robau.

Captain Robau once attempted the Adama Manuever with no ship and no last-second jump. The planet was Ceti Alpha 6.

Changlings can mimic any form...except for Captian Robau.

Chuck Norris hides a third fist underneath his beard. Captian Robau doesn't even need a third fist.

The "humanoid lifeforms" that claimed to have seeded the galaxy are merely taking credit for Captian Robau's work.
 
When Captain Robau learned that Faran Tahir would be playing him in ST XI, he killed him, because no one plays Captain Robau.
 
Captain Robau is MODMAN, because he runs this shit.

Captain Robau put the bomp in the bomp ba bomp ba bomp, *and* the dip in the dip da dip da dip.
 
Captain Robau as the power to put a zero at the front of his starship registry number.
 
People near the US they were so shit scared they named CUBA after him: Captain Robau.

He made the Nexus with his own hands using leftover plasma from destroyed Klingon warp cores.

The Fedreation didn't form because different species wanted to live together in peace, Robau told them to under pain of death.
 
The reasons there are no octopuses in Earth's oceans in the 23rd century? Captain Robau killed them all. The reason Captain Robau joined Starfleet? He heard there was an octopus in space...
 
Captian Robau built the dyson sphere, single handedly, completely out of LEGO.

When his 5th grade math teacher told him he couldn't divide by zero, Captian Robau killed him and did it anyway.

Captian Robau received his commission 0.68 seconds after his conception.

The doomsday machine was built specifically to defeat Captian Robau. Robau laughed at the pathetic effort.

Tribbles don't breed in the presence of Captian Robau.

Captian Robau doesn't need cloaking devices. He can will light itself to curve around him.
 
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