New Pics. New Round.
And Extra credit
And Extra credit
DS9 Caption That # "The Alliance Strikes Back"
- Thread starter Judas Ascendant
- Start date
Mirror-Garak: "Clearly this proves that my couterpart in that opposite universe MUST be straight!"
Siddig: "Terry, you may be leaving for Becker, but remember that you'll always have a place in all of our hearts here at DS9."
Farrell: "That's so sweet."
Siddig: "Bwa-ha-ha!!! She actually bought that!"
Valuable shooting time for the 70's blaxploitation film "Blackenstein" is lost when a hard of hearing costumer mistakenly believes that she is making "Black Einstein".
All Seeing Eye
Admiral
Guy in Cell: God I love charades, ok its a film, first word.....
Bashir: God damn it Sisko its not working......
Bashir: are you sure this is how you do the Vulcan neck pinch?
Smiley: Ok this one is easy... onions, garlic, green olives... no make that black olives, and basil. You had pizza for dinner.
Worf: If you were any other man I would KISS you where you stand... err lay... whatever...
Bashir: I understand that in the other reality I was some sort of chiropractor or something like that. Just let me try one thing.
Bashir: Hey guys, did you hear that sound her neck made? That is so cool!
Sisko: When I count to three, I'm going to turn around; and then you pull my finger.
And Extra credit
Book: When we get this Firefly class ship up to 88 mile per hour you're going to see some serious shit!
Bump.
Care to pin this one, PKTrekGirl?
Care to pin this one, PKTrekGirl?
Introducing the Canadian Mirror Universe
Bashir: "I'm not your friend, buddy!"
Smiley: "I'm not your buddy, guy!"
Worf: "I told you to order the total sports package from Direct TV!"
In the Mirror Universe, Bashir was a chiropractor.
Bashir: "She may be Sisko's sloppy seconds, but I really don't mind."
Sisko: "I'm with the Fashion Police. Who are you trying to be? Catwoman?"
Book: "I let Jayne try to comb my hair."
"Bah! Flinn has the worst fashion taste in the Alpha Quadrant, his breath's bad, his wife's uglier than a Vorta and don't even get me started on those boots.....he's standing right behind me, isn't he?"
Bashir: But by God, I was the best damn Prime Minister England ever had in the 5 minutes of screen time I had in Doomsday!
O'Brien: What?
O'Brien: What?
"You know, it's the Mirror Universe, you could have at least grown a goatee or something..."
"Do not hug me."
"Your hair has so much body and volume, I just have to smell it..."
"I'm gonna take a wild guess and say Pantene Pro-V."
"Hold on. I'm trying to think of a really dirty caption. Gimme a minute..."
Awesome avatar, Rat Boy. 
The Alliance Idol group sings were just as horrid as their 21st Century counterparts.
Most people over-romanticize the Mirror Universe with its penchant for goatees and women with lesbian tendencies. What they overlook is the flip side of that equation.
Bashir: What is this, eczema? I thought we cured that centuries ago.
Bashir: You know, with a little more work, I could get my hair to look like this.
Sisko: I get it. We're in the Mirror Universe. Everything is supposed to be darker, but will someone please turn up the damned lights?!?
Thanks to the miracle of cloning, the 24th Century could enjoy the wit and wisdom of Gene Shalit, too.
No no no! I'm Ron Glass! Not Tim Reid! I was never on WKRP! It was Barney Miller! It ran for seven years, not like this one year ufo crap! Not Barney Fife you idiots! Fish? Wojciehowicz? Dietrich? They were cops! No really! No, I don't know Loni Anderson! Aagggggh I'm quitting this business!
Bashear: And now to prove how heterosexual and manly I am I will kiss this woman with all the passion and lust and masculine chauvinism at my disposal, to prove once and for all that I'm not afraid to kiss a woman but that I am truly a real man who likes sex and big behinded women and public displays of affection -
O'Brien: Just do it already!
Oh I am Smiley. I am. What's that, a sandwich? Turkey? Hey are we still on for squash later?
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Bashir: Just wait until I see Jadzia, I'll be sure to tell her that! (Part 2 Coming Up Later)
Garak: Actually, I'm not sure Constable Odo has a mother...
Bashir: Don't cry Jadzia, Smiley said he was just worried about your weight - he just cares that's all.
Bashir: Are you proud of yourself now, Smiley?!
Sisko: Is it commonplace for mirror universe counterparts to have small men surgically attached to their arms? Because guess what I had done earlier today!
Book: Hey, you came to the wrong mirror universe! Bugger off before you stop Serenity being made!
How do you get your ridges so straight?
Checkout's at noon. And if there's anything else you need, ask for Bennie.
Bashir: I'm totally copping a feel right now.
Dax: I'll try to contain my excitement.
--- When in Quark's Bar Obrien and Smiley engage in some skit comedy. ---
Smiley: Well O'Brian, when on Earth, I'm going to New York with you. You know Bucky Harris the Seventh, the NY Yankee's manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.
O'Brian: Look Smiley, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.
Smiley: I certainly do.
O'Brian: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Smiley: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.
O'Brian: You mean funny names?
Smiley: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean the eighth...
O'Brian: His brother Daffy.
Smiley: Daffy Dean the tenth...
O'Brian: And their French cousin.
Smiley: French, Jean Luc Picard?
O'Brian: Goofè.
Smiley: Riiight, Goofè Dean . Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...
O'Brian: That's what I want to find out.
Smiley: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
O'Brian: Are you the manager?
Smiley: Yes.
O'Brian: You gonna be the coach too?
Smiley: Yes.
O'Brian: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Smiley: Well I should.
O'Brian: Well then who's on first?
Smiley: Yes.
O'Brian: I mean the fellow's name.
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: The guy on first.
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: The first baseman.
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: The guy playing...
Smiley: Who is on first!
O'Brian: I'm asking YOU who's on first.
Smiley: That's the man's name.
O'Brian: That's who's name?
Smiley: Yes.
O'Brian: Well go ahead and tell me.
Smiley: That's it.
O'Brian: That's who?
Smiley: Yes.
PAUSE
O'Brian: Look, you gotta first baseman?
Smiley: Certainly.
O'Brian: Who's playing first?
Smiley: That's right.
O'Brian: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
Smiley: Every dollar of it.
O'Brian: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: The guy that gets...
Smiley: That's it.
O'Brian: Who gets the money...
Smiley: He does, every dollar. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.
O'Brian: Whose wife?
Smiley: Yes.
PAUSE
Smiley: What's wrong with that?
O'Brian: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: The guy.
Smiley: Who.
O'Brian: How does he sign...
Smiley: That's how he signs it.
O'Brian: Who?
Smiley: Yes.
PAUSE
O'Brian: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base.
Smiley: No. What is on second base.
O'Brian: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Smiley: Who's on first.
O'Brian: One base at a time!
Smiley: Well, don't change the players around.
O'Brian: I'm not changing nobody!
Smiley: Take it easy, buddy.
O'Brian: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?
Smiley: That's right.
O'Brian: Ok.
Smiley: All right.
PAUSE
O'Brian: What's the guy's name on first base?
Smiley: No. What is on second.
O'Brian: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Smiley: Who's on first.
O'Brian: I don't know.
Smiley: He's on third, we're not talking about him.
O'Brian: Now how did I get on third base?
Smiley: Why you mentioned his name.
O'Brian: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?
Smiley: No. Who's playing first.
O'Brian: What's on first?
Smiley: What's on second.
O'Brian: I don't know.
Smiley: He's on third.
O'Brian: There I go, back on third again!
PAUSE
O'Brian: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.
Smiley: All right, what do you want to know?
O'Brian: Now who's playing third base?
Smiley: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?
O'Brian: What am I putting on third.
Smiley: No. What is on second.
O'Brian: You don't want who on second?
Smiley: Who is on first.
O'Brian: I don't know.
Smiley & O'Brian Together:Third base!
PAUSE
O'Brian: Look, you gotta outfield?
Smiley: Sure.
O'Brian: The left fielder's name?
Smiley: Why.
O'Brian: I just thought I'd ask you.
Smiley: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.
O'Brian: Then tell me who's playing left field.
Smiley: Who's playing first.
O'Brian: I'm not... stay out of the infield! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?
Smiley: No, What is on second.
O'Brian: I'm not asking you who's on second.
Smiley: Who's on first!
O'Brian: I don't know.
Smiley & O'Brian Together: Third base!
PAUSE
O'Brian: The left fielder's name?
Smiley: Why.
O'Brian: Because!
Smiley: Oh, he's centerfield.
PAUSE
O'Brian: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?
Smiley: Sure.
O'Brian: The pitcher's name?
Smiley: Tomorrow.
O'Brian: You don't want to tell me today?
Smiley: I'm telling you now.
O'Brian: Then go ahead.
Smiley: Tomorrow!
O'Brian: What time?
Smiley: What time what?
O'Brian: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?
Smiley: Now listen. Who is not pitching.
O'Brian: I'll break your arm, you say who's on first! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?
Smiley: What's on second.
O'Brian: I don't know.
Smiley & O'Brian Together: Third base!
PAUSE
O'Brian: Gotta a catcher?
Smiley: Certainly.
O'Brian: The catcher's name?
Smiley: Today.
O'Brian: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.
Smiley: Now you've got it.
O'Brian: All we got is a couple of days on the team.
PAUSE
O'Brian: You know I'm a catcher too.
Smiley: So they tell me.
O'Brian: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first base. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?
Smiley: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
O'Brian: I don't even know what I'm talking about!
PAUSE
Smiley: That's all you have to do.
O'Brian: Is to throw the ball to first base.
Smiley: Yes!
O'Brian: Now who's got it?
Smiley: Naturally.
PAUSE
O'Brian: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?
Smiley: Naturally.
O'Brian: Who?
Smiley: Naturally.
O'Brian: Naturally?
Smiley: Naturally.
O'Brian: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
Smiley: No you don't, you throw the ball to Who.
O'Brian: Naturally.
Smiley: That's different.
O'Brian: That's what I said.
Smiley: You're not saying it...
O'Brian: I throw the ball to Naturally.
Smiley: You throw it to Who.
O'Brian: Naturally.
Smiley: That's it.
O'Brian: That's what I said!
Smiley: You ask me.
O'Brian: I throw the ball to who?
Smiley: Naturally.
O'Brian: Now you ask me.
Smiley: You throw the ball to Who?
O'Brian: Naturally.
Smiley: That's it.
O'Brian: Same as you! Same as YOU! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!
Smiley: What?
O'Brian: I said I don't give a darn!
Smiley: Oh, that's our shortstop.
<Laughter in Quark's Bar and applauding>
Worf: Didn't you know I am really female, and my breasts are killing me after smashing them down under my uniform?
Cardassian: Oh kiss me Worf you sthilly biiitch!
The winners this round
The prize
Breshanti Ale.. Now you're ready to Tanqueray,
or Breshanti....
Well you're ready for something....
Worf: If you were any other man I would KISS you where you stand... err lay... whatever...
"You know, it's the Mirror Universe, you could have at least grown a goatee or something..."
The prize
Breshanti Ale.. Now you're ready to Tanqueray,
or Breshanti....
Well you're ready for something....
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