DS9 Caption Contest #55: The Kai, ya Winn some, ya lose some...

[Bob Karo]

Winn: When you removed the book from the cradle, did you speak the words?

Dukat: Yeah, basically.

Winn: Did you speak the exact words?
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0132257/
Dukat: Look, maybe I didn't say every single little tiny syllable, no. But basically I said them, yeah.

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Dukat: "You nincompoop! I told you to get the Kosst Amojan on Kindle, not use it as kindling!"

 

[Turd Ferguson]

"All right, child, we'll settle this the old fashioned way. If you win, you and Bareil can live without fear of my intervention. You know the rules. No blinking. Ready one... two... three... go!"

"AH! THE VISIONS! DEATH! DESTRUCTION!"

"Emissary, the Orb of Prophecy works best when it is open."

"Oh, I thought this was one of those 'Kindle' things the youngsters are always talking about. I must admit, I thought something was wrong because the pages are hard to make out when they're on fire."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

"That is, without doubt, the hottest lesbian fanfic I've ever encountered!"

 

[BennyRussel]

Alas, try as he may, The Emissary, with all his wisdom and knowledge could not teach his Bajoran disciples the finer points of the Soul Train line.

 

[Nerys Myk]

WINN: That's a great Gowron, child. Can you do Martok?

 

[Sindatur]

WINN: That's a great Gowron, child. Can you do Martok?

 

[NAHTMMM]

"You do realize that you can't actually shoot laser beams out of your eyes."
"Keep telling yourself that."

Winn: SISKO! Beware the Ides of March!

Winn: Well, that's the last time I buy the "hot new book" at a fire sale.

Ha!

 

[Honorable Ensign]

Winn: What?! Why is everybody staring?
Sisko: I think it's the hat.

Winn: Not this hat either, I take it.

Winn: Drat. Why does that keep happening when I touch holy things?

 

[Finn]

Kira: Eminence, may I tell you something?

Kai: Of course, child

Kira: You are supposed to remove that white cardboard after buying it from the store.

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Winn: "The Orb of Time never revealed what happened to your mother."
Kira: "I learned enough. Dukat took her from us, and put her in his personal harem. She became a collaborator."
Winn: "No my child. I am your mother."
Kira: "Nooooooooo! That's impossible!"

 

[Isis]

Winn: "This isn't what I meant when I said I'd like to get a little something-something going with match.com."

 

[Isis]

Winn: "No, I don't appreciate this 'unique' presentation of 'Dante's Inferno.'"

Dukat: "Then, can I take it you're not interested in seeing what I could do with 'Towering Inferno'?"

 

[Isis]

Kira (to self): "Ah...Bohemian Rhapsody...a little pitchy today, but still a moving rendition."

 

[shivkala]

Kira (to self): "Ah...Bohemian Rhapsody...a little pitchy today, but still a moving rendition."

Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia, let me go
Kost Amojan has a Pah Wraith put aside for me, for me,
for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

 

[apenpaap]

"Emissary or not, no-one tells the Kai when to put up the new contest. May the Prophets forgive you for complaining."

Kira, thinking: Maybe she'll get the new contest up if I stare at her long enough...

"What do you see, Emissary?"
"I see... A vision... The, Prophets... They are telling, you, to put... Up the new contest!"

 

[Isis]

Kira (to self): "Ah...Bohemian Rhapsody...a little pitchy today, but still a moving rendition."

Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia, let me go
Kost Amojan has a Pah Wraith put aside for me, for me,
for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Man to the right of Winn: "Let me introduce..."

<brief pause>

Same man: "Oh, I guess you two have already met."

 

[LeadHead]

Hiya everyone! May is insanely busy! But with any luck, I should have the new contest up late tonight! Thanks for bearing with me!

 

[ElimGarak]

Kira inhales deeply, relishing the aroma of day old hasperat wafting from beneath her eminence's soiled robes.

The Kai's followers bow in reverence of their spiritual leader's gastrointestinal prowess.

Kai Winn: Safety!

 

[LeadHead]

New contest is up!