Do you ever feel inferior?

[The Boy Who Cried Worf]

The problem with feeling inferior is it becomes a full-time job. There are literally endless people and situations out there to compare yourself with and you'll inevitable come up short in the vast majority of them. I am not saying I am free of it, quite the opposite. I was once a bright young boy who was always one of the best in his class. Then around age 14 I started having issues with mental illness and from my point of view it all went downhill from there. Despite my earlier comment coming here does really bring out a lot of inferiority in me at times. There are a lot of people here who share similar interests and goals as I do. When I was young I wanted to be a cosmologist. Sometimes when I hear Iguana or Flying Lemons talk about their jobs I feel a great sense of inferiority. I could and have spent a great deal of my life feeling that way.

I guess the secret is acceptance though. I don't men that as a shallow cliche I mean it as the truth. There are certain realities and certain situations you have to accept in order to see where you are in life. It's from there that you have to figure out what could be the happiest path for you in life.

 

[freak]

Yes...more so recently. When I was younger, I felt inferior sometimes..now I feel it most of the time. I see all of my good friends desert me and run off and get married, have kids and have great careers. I'm pushing 30 with little to nothing to show for it..no boyfriend, no job, no career. I know I shouldn't sweat it but I don't want to end up being a 30 year old maid, taking care of others. It's high time I have a wonderful life of happiness of my own. Recently I've gone through the trauma of losing a good friend because of conflict and now i just feel like disappearing in my own little world. Today I went to help with a project and this person was with me..but they didn't even act like they wanted me to be around. When I talked to them earlier, they said that it was just the way they are..this person hasn't been this way to me before though. Guess they are showing their true colors for me at the moment and I've just been too blind to notice. Now that i think about it, I realize that I don't really need this person in my life anymore. They've got their own way, and I've got mine. I can be just fine without them! But i've learned to accept the fact that not all of your friends are considered "good" friends.
I've tried to overcome feeling inferior by giving myself compliments every single day, whether it be "oh your makeup looks fantastic" or "oh your hair is perfect today" or "hey you actually look thin for once!!!". It's hard trying to overcome inferiority..especially with low self esteem such as mine. But that's an issue I have to deal with myself. I've learned to take life as it comes. To expect the unexpected.

 

[Punky]

When I was young I wanted to be a cosmologist. Sometimes when I hear Iguana or Flying Lemons talk about their jobs I feel a great sense of inferiority.

It is never to late to do what it is you have always desired...

 

[Amaris]

When I was young I wanted to be a cosmologist. Sometimes when I hear Iguana or Flying Lemons talk about their jobs I feel a great sense of inferiority.

It is never to late to do what it is you have always desired...

Ideally, you would be correct, and as someone who deals in idealism and the potential for what could be, I really want to agree with that. However, the world works differently. The appearance of opportunity abounds everywhere, but genuine opportunities are very rare. I fell for the line my teachers used to tell me, that line that says you can do anything if you put your mind to it. It's just not true. Oh, if all things were equal, absolutely, but all things are not equal.

 

[gturner]

I can't even relate to this thread. I'm white, Protestant, and half Anglo and half Saxon (my mom's side). My basketball team (Univ of Kentucky) is ranked #2 in the nation. My cat worships me. I'm so cool that every time I break out the ouija board, James Dean says "Just Die Already". William Shatner bought a nearby horse farm just to be closer to me. How could I possibly feel inferior?

 

[AstroSmurf]

I have times where I feel inferior. When it comes to me as a person, my life, my accomplishments, I rarely feel that way. I tend to feel very inferior when it comes to my work.

I work as an artist. I do various types of design work, murals, photography, graphic design, paintings, etc. When I am doing something for myself, I just do what I like and move on. But when I am doing work for someone else or design something to be seen by the masses, I obsess over the worth or validity of every one of my ideas. And I never think anything I come up with is good enough so I end up choking and slinging something together at the last minute just to get it over with. I also don't have a formal degree (I never finished college) and that makes me feel very unsure of things as well. Needless to say, I find myself spending a huge amount of time looking for reassurance. I have even posted things here hoping for some constructive criticism or opinions to make myself feel better. Hell, all I need to do is come here and see that my work as an artist is alright. I mean my communicators are on the front page here and the site uses my smilies. <---- See?

I wish I had more self-confidence. It would make my life so much easier. If I could make a successful career out of it, I would think differently I guess. But I am also fully aware that if I had more confidence my career would be successful. *sigh* It is a vicious cycle that I would love to get myself out of.

 

[iguana_tonante]

When I was young I wanted to be a cosmologist. Sometimes when I hear Iguana or Flying Lemons talk about their jobs I feel a great sense of inferiority.

I just wanted to say, the grass is not that green on this side, too. Jobs like that can give you a great deal of satisfaction, but the are also very confidence-shattering. I'm not talking about hounding for funds or feeling humbled by the sheer vastness of the universe. It's just that, most of the time, I feel very stupid. I mean, I know I'm not stupid; I'm quick on my wit, I scored well on my IQ test, I'm a pretty sharp guy all around. But I constantly work with extremely intelligent people, 24/7. People that can grasp advanced math without breaking a sweat, wrap their head around 11-dimensional geometry without a fuss, or just write code with an infuriating ease. In the meanwhile, I have to struggle and burn the midnight oil just to keep the pace, let alone take the lead. You need a gigantic ego just for keeping up with that, or you'll find yourself a nervous wreck in two weeks. So I would say: the inflated sense of self-worth that comes with this kind of jobs is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because you get to feel really good about yourself... and a curse because you have to keep up with that, a never-ending race to outrun yourself. It can be tiring, trust me.

 

[Shaytan]

Parisians have an ego the size of the Eiffel Tower...thankfully, some of us don't take ourselves too seriously

 

[sidious618]

Only occasionally. I look at people that I went to high school with and see where they are in life and get a little jealous. Full-time careers, marriage, babies, buying houses...

I'm happy I have none of those things. Once I graduate college I only want the career. No houses, marriages or babies for me.

 

[iguana_tonante]

Parisians have an ego the size of the Eiffel Tower...thankfully, some of us don't take ourselves too seriously

It's not the size of your ego that matters, but how well you use it!

 

[Michael Chris]

Sometimes, but I can really compare myself to other people. God has unique plans for everyone.

 

[Finn]

I'm happy I have none of those things. Once I graduate college I only want the career. No houses, marriages or babies for me.

Only the career? It isnt much of a life if it's all about your career. You don't have to have a wife, kids and a house, but it's healthy to have a life outside of your work.

Only occasionally. I look at people that I went to high school with and see where they are in life and get a little jealous. Full-time careers, marriage, babies, buying houses...

I'd bet at least some of them (or people like them) envy you in some levels. I'd probably get that from some of my old classmates when I tell them about going back to school and getting myself a fiancee.

 

[MeanJoePhaser]

I only feel inferior when I'm around other people.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Not particularly. I mean, I probably *am* inferior, I just don't *feel* that way.

Besides, the world needs lower-class scum like me too.

 

[captcalhoun]

yes, every time some asshole pwns me on Modern Warfare 2.

every time i take a good look at my life. i'm 32, single, living with my parents, in a minimum wage job and no prospects.

on the otehr hand, i'm healthy, i've got money to spend on what i want, i'm beholden to no one and i'm not living in an African shit hole terrified of being murdered or living in Afghanistan worrying if i'll even be alive tomorrow.

 

[Jetfire]

^
At-least you have a job.

 

[Kail]

All the time. My boss goes out of his way to belittle me and make me feel stupid. It's a source of entertainment for him to constantly pick on me. He says it's a "joke". No matter how many times I tell him it's not funny, he can't stop himself. I try not to let it get to me to much as I know he's probably just trying to feel better about himself as he weighs about 450 pounds. Sometimes I just want to kill him.

 

[RandyS]

There were times when I was younger that I felt inferior to other people, yeah. For a long time I was told I was worthless by my dad and brother, and by many women I had asked out. They in particular used to tell me that I wasn't good enough to be alive because I have Cerebral Palsy. It was my grandpa that turned me around. He used to tell me that it didn't matter what other people thought of me, only what I thought of myself. From that, I realized that I am in fact, the greatest, most special person that ever lived.

To hell with everybody else.

Well, with one exception.

 

[Warp Coil]

My feelings of inferiority come and go in waves. There are many times when I feel quite good about myself - I've accomplished a few goals in my life that others haven't. I graduated from college, found a full-time job with benefits, managed to become financially independent, bought my own place, etc. Essentially, I've successfully transitioned into an adult. I have a few friends who haven't been able to do this successfully. Whereas I have made (relatively) smart decisions, others have made poor choices which have backfired on them. Some of my closest friends are working minimum-wage jobs, barely scraping by. They don't really seem to understand how to function independently in the world and rely on family for financial and/or emotional support. They never went to college, or never stuck with it long enough to finish. They can't save a dime - they don't make enough money to save anything, and if they did, they would find silly things to blow it on. Life is a constant battle for them. And sometimes I feel like I've got it easy.

Of course, there's a flip side to everything. I see others struggling where I am not, I also turn around and still manage to feel inferior to others. Ya know, the good-looking, out-going, alphas who are more successful than me. They're making more money, doing more interesting things. They've got relationships, they're starting families. It seems like they're living life. I often feel like I'm just coasting by.

So it kinda goes both ways for me.

 

[Warped9]

It was my grandpa that turned me around. He used to tell me that it didn't matter what other people thought of me, only what I thought of myself.

That's very true and it's something I've often told others after learning it myself.

Every so often I still encounter someone who seems a little too hellbent on belittling me or someone else. I've learned to push back when appropriate. Otherwise they take silence as permission to continue their shitty behaviour.

Sometimes a well placed "fuck you" can do wonders for your peace of mind.