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Crossover idea

Chi'pok

Lieutenant
Red Shirt
Hi all: I wanted to get your thoughts on this. I am a member of fan site devoted to Luke Synder and Noah Mayer on the soap opera As the World Turns; for those who don't know, they are a fictional gay teen couple on the show (played by 20-something actors). I have written the beginnings of a storyline with two different arcs; one is based on their show; the other is based on Enterprise. In the Enterprise version, so far I've written a bit with Enterprise returning to Earth right after the Xindi attack (with our heroes as a Lt. and an Ensign who happen to be married); therefore the characters are the same age as the actors; but haven't gone further. The feedback I received so far from the other site leads me to think that the Trek version is a non-starter for them; so I thought I would post it here if people were interested. If you are, I can post what I have here. If not, well, then I will probably just write it for myself.

Thanks for reading,

Peter, aka Chi'pok aka Locutus of Nuke (on the fansite I belong to; thought Trek people would enjoy that screenname)
 
thanks for the vote of confidence. All I have is a fragment right now. I have to think up where I want to go with it and what people would want to see that would be realistic and believable. Should I post what I have now, or wait for more replies?; I don't want to incur the wrath of the moderators
 
I wouldn't worry about that. :) The Mods on this board are lenient, so long as the material your posting is PG-13 appropriate. Post what you've got, and the folks here will offer honest feedback.
 
"NO!," he screamed...

Luke woke with a start. He had only screamed in his mind. The room was pitch black and he felt panicky. He soon settled down and realized that Noah was in the bed with him. The paralysis, Maddie, Noah's dad, all of it, was a dream that was quickly fading. Noah stirred beside him. Luke felt Noah's hands wrapped around him.

"Jesus," Luke thought; "did all that really happen?"

"Noah! Noah! wake up!"

Noah was still sleeping soundly. Luke shook him.

"Wha--?" said Noah.

"Noah, I'm sorry, but I had a terrible dream! I ... I don't know how to describe it..."

Luke was on the verge of tears. This made Noah wake up fully.

"Luke, what's wrong?" Noah asked.

"Oh God, Noah; I don't know if I should tell you..."

"Snyder, get a grip! Tell me what's going on. I can help."

"Ok, well I was in the hospital, and ... your dad put me there. I was paralyzed," Luke's voice quavered. He was hot and uncomfortable. He didn't want to tell Noah, but Noah loved him too much for Luke to lie to him.

"Luke, what are you talking about; both my parents are gone."

"I know it's crazy, but... it felt real!"

Noah didn't respond, all he did was hug Luke and make him feel safe.

Before they both knew it, the comm system chirped. "Archer to Snyder."

Luke groaned; he got up and padded over to the comm array. "Snyder here, sir."

"Luke, you wanted to be informed when we reached Earth orbit..."

"Oh, right, thanks, Captain; Ensign Synder-Mayer and I will be on the bridge shortly."

"All right. Archer out."

Lt. Luke Snyder loved to rib Noah about his rank. But Noah gave as good as he got. Noah started getting up and moving around their cramped cabin on Enterprise NX-01. Noah said, "Captain Archer is somber." Luke replied with a biting retort: "He has a right to be, Noah; those aliens destroyed so many people!"

Luke was both saddened and relieved that they were back at Earth. The business with the Xindi wasn't going away anytime soon. He felt for Commander Tucker's family who had lost a daughter. Luke was still shaken by the attack on Florida and Venezuela that had cost seven million lives. He felt hot spikes of anger at those damned aliens for even attempting, much less succeeding at attacking his home planet. United Earth wasn't going to sit back and let a bunch of mindless aliens destroy what it took humans so long to rebuild after World War III.
 
You've got a good start, but I'd suggest being careful about dropping the "f-bomb" too often as that might take you out of PG-13 territory. I'm glad to see that someone is tackling "Enterprise" era stories and I hope you continue.
 
thanks. yeah, I was wondering about that. I think I will change it now. I have an idea for a storyline, but I need to work on it; it involves Shran (one of my favorite characters).
 
We've got a very understanding moderator here and I think she understands that every once in a while, a story absolutely calls for the dropping of an f- or s- bomb--sometimes, using one of the "seven deadly words" is the best way to convey the necessary emotion or stress that you want to convey. I think of them as the strategic nukes in my writer's arsenal. :)

A story focusing on Shran would be good, but have you thought about setting a story on another NX with an original crew?
 
thanks for your reply, David. I may revert the change then for more dramatic impact.

regarding your suggestion: no, I didn't think about putting them on a different NX ship; I was using this as a jump off point. I could create a whole new ship, but would have to move the story ahead a few years, since I think Columbia was the only other ship being built at the time of the Xindi arc. I'm playing around with ideas; maybe move it closer to the Earth/Romulan war? more ships available.
 
There's a lot of room within which to work. There's no reason Columbia would be the only other ship being built at the time--in fact, you could make a case that the Xindi threat would spur an increase in ship building.

Whatever you choose to do, I applaud your setting your story during this period--it gives you quite a bit of creative freedom in which to work.
 
Has anyone here ever had a girlfriend or do you all just stay at home watching the entire star trek season 1 on a saturday night?
 
Warning for trolling to kirk4eva.

Any questions, Pm me. Pleaase do not derail the thread further with discussion of the warning here.
 
thanks again David. out of curiosity, what would you like to see in this story? I have an idea which involves Shran (because I like his character as I mentioned in a previous post); let me know.
 
This is a little something I always like to tell new writers: Write your story your way. Don't try to please your readers at the expense of not telling your story. I've seen stories posted on other sites where the readers will literally hijack the writer's story trying to make him or her conform to how they want the story to run rather than what the writer had intended resulting in the writer becoming disenchanted and giving up. Breath your own life into your work. If you put the care and love for your work that I know you have for it--it'll come through in the story and I and the other readers will be swept along with it.
 
thanks for your input, both of you. The reason I asked is because on the fansite I belong to (vanhansis.net) we have been so starved for screentime for our characters that I wanted to ask them what they wanted to see.

I like the breathe quote; may I use that?
 
I’d echo David’s words. First and foremost, the story has to be something you want to tell. Tailoring it for the whims of others will only serve to pollute your vision and the narrative will suffer for it.

The only other advice I’d give is to make the fact that your two main characters are gay incidental. It’s the 22nd century, and such things would doubtless be of no noticeable consequence. My point being that the sexual orientation of the protagonists should be of no more significance than if the characters were heterosexual. I would hate to see a promising story derailed because it over emphasized one minute facet of the main characters’ lives. :)

I myself have a gay character in my fanfic ship's crew, but most of my readers would be hard pressed to remember who it was. ;)
 
Gibraltar said:
I myself have a gay character in my fanfic ship's crew, but most of my readers would be hard pressed to remember who it was. ;)

I recently reread the first two Gibraltar stories, and I certainly couldn't tell you who you were talking about. ;)

But, responding to the original topic... I agree that homosexuality would be a nontopic even by the time of Enterprise. Sexual preference, like race, I just don't think would matter to people of the Trek future.
 
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