What I've always wondered is why reheated tea isn't as good as fresh tea...
This is easy - you've already lost the interesting volatile aromatics, and are now just concentrating the bitter tannins. You're effectively cooking the tea, chemically altering it.
Also, on the original topic, I should add that tea likes being poured over with the hot water. When you add water from a kettle/pan, you generally have the teabag or leaves already in the cup, so that natually happens. When you heat the water in the microwave, you then dunk the bag in afterwards, which unless particularly vigorously done, is not as effective in releasing the best flavour from the tea.
why it tastes better if you put the milk in before microwaving it rather than after.
If you're putting the bag in cold water, and then heating them all up together, you really DO need to add milk first. Effectively you're making masala chai without the spices. Without the milk (and preferably whole fat milk at that), you're just cooking the tea, and have the same tannin problem. Milk binds to tannins, soaking them up, preventing bitterness. Also, the milk will sweeten as it heats, again compensating for any bitterness.
(The spices added to masala chai also mask any residual effect of cooking tea.)