Bad Day

[Brent]

Hope you all don't mind a little ranting and raving from me today, I'm an emotional wreck. So a month ago I got a speeding ticket, clocked me at 71 MPH and the speed limit was 55 MPH. In my defense, I was in a rental car, more powerful than my own, I was going down hill down the mountain, it was a straight away, and there was no traffic, and I didn't know it was 55. The cop gave me a ticket and I had to go to court on October 18th. So, I went to court on October 18th and the judge found me guilty (I did explain the circumstances) so I paid the fine that day and that was that, or so I thought.

I got a letter in the mail yesterday (that I just opened today) that says my License will be suspended on October 31st-November 30th! I'm like WTF. I guess there is a General Statute (20-16.1) in North Carolina that if you are traveling in excess of 15 MPH over the speed limit over 55 MPH there is a mandatory 30 day suspension of your license! I'm from Texas, and Texas laws were not this strict! So I'm freaking out now. Without a car how am I supposed to survive for a month? I'm a single guy, on my own in this town. There is a number you can call on the letter for more information, first thing in the morning I'm going to call and try to plead with them, but written clearly on the letter it says: "A Hearing is not authorized by statute". DANG. Why so strict, I'm not a criminal, I don't usually get speeding tickets, this isn't like a DUI or anything, geeeeez.

The other bad part about this, and the part that really gets to me (cause I can take things like this thrown at me) is the lack of family support up here. I have one family member, a sister, who lives up here in the same town, she's younger than me, currently 16 (technically half-sister, she lives with her mom), but she has a license and her own car, and I've just found out I can expect no support or help from her AT ALL.

I called her, explained the problem and asked if she could help take me to places I need to go for November. Her answer? No. She said she has to drive herself to places and can't make the time for me. She told me to ride the local bus. WTF! Thanks a lot. So selfish. At least I know where I stand now with her, she doesn't care and is unwilling to help when I need it. Yet, I have certainly helped her in the past, such as taking her and her friends wherever they wanted to go when she couldn't drive, and then letting her drive my car whenever she wanted when she had her permit so she could practice, I've helped her so much in the past, and she can't turn around and do the same. It really makes me angry, and disappointed. So I can expect NO help from the only family member that lives up here with me, great.

Bad Day.

 

[Jetfire]

Family can be horrible.

 

[Brent]

And my birthday is on November 6th, but I won't be able to go anywhere. And then Thanksgiving, I learned today that my sister and her mom are going to some friends house in Florida, and I'm not invited. So I'm stuck up here, can't travel down to my grandmas house in Georgia cause I can't drive now, so I guess I'll be having thanksgiving home, alone.

 

[Jetfire]

Yeah that sucks...tough break. I have been there before.

 

[enlisted person]

Hope you all don't mind a little ranting and raving from me today, I'm an emotional wreck. So a month ago I got a speeding ticket, clocked me at 71 MPH and the speed limit was 55 MPH. In my defense, I was in a rental car, more powerful than my own, I was going down hill down the mountain, it was a straight away, and there was no traffic, and I didn't know it was 55. The cop gave me a ticket and I had to go to court on October 18th. So, I went to court on October 18th and the judge found me guilty (I did explain the circumstances) so I paid the fine that day and that was that, or so I thought.

I got a letter in the mail yesterday (that I just opened today) that says my License will be suspended on October 31st-November 30th! I'm like WTF. I guess there is a General Statute (20-16.1) in North Carolina that if you are traveling in excess of 15 MPH over the speed limit over 55 MPH there is a mandatory 30 day suspension of your license! I'm from Texas, and Texas laws were not this strict! So I'm freaking out now. Without a car how am I supposed to survive for a month? I'm a single guy, on my own in this town. There is a number you can call on the letter for more information, first thing in the morning I'm going to call and try to plead with them, but written clearly on the letter it says: "A Hearing is not authorized by statute". DANG. Why so strict, I'm not a criminal, I don't usually get speeding tickets, this isn't like a DUI or anything, geeeeez.

The other bad part about this, and the part that really gets to me (cause I can take things like this thrown at me) is the lack of family support up here. I have one family member, a sister, who lives up here in the same town, she's younger than me, currently 16 (technically half-sister, she lives with her mom), but she has a license and her own car, and I've just found out I can expect no support or help from her AT ALL.

I called her, explained the problem and asked if she could help take me to places I need to go for November. Her answer? No. She said she has to drive herself to places and can't make the time for me. She told me to ride the local bus. WTF! Thanks a lot. So selfish. At least I know where I stand now with her, she doesn't care and is unwilling to help when I need it. Yet, I have certainly helped her in the past, such as taking her and her friends wherever they wanted to go when she couldn't drive, and then letting her drive my car whenever she wanted when she had her permit so she could practice, I've helped her so much in the past, and she can't turn around and do the same. It really makes me angry, and disappointed. So I can expect NO help from the only family member that lives up here with me, great.

Bad Day.

I wish I had seen this sooner. I have been through the whole thing here in NC many times. Its all about money, You hire a lawyer or talk to the DA and get it reduced to something below point you lose your license.

 

[enlisted person]

Here is the real rub, had you gotten a first offence DWI, you can get a limited driving privilege to drive between certain hours, you lose it for speeding and there is no such thing. Its crooked as hell but that is how it is.

 

[Shatnertage]

Sorry to hear about this, Brent. This is pretty bad.

Although if I ever find myself in NC, I'm going to keep an eagle eye on my speedometer. I had no idea this could happen. Or I'll ask enlisted person to find me a fixer.

 

[Paulcpick]

sounds like you should come back to Texas brotha.....

honestly, If it were me, I would say to heck with it and drive anyway, ya gotta do what ya gotta do, but im not telling you to do this, got to decide if getting the Driving Without A License trouble is outweighed by your personal needs.

other than that, hope everything gets worked out for ya and remember, Texas hasn't gone anywhere

just for comparison, about a year and a half ago, I got a ticket @ nite doing 82 in a 65 and it only cost me about $175 bucks IIRC.

 

[Brent]

I'll survive, I'm going to go to the stores this week and just stock up on a bunch of stuff to last me the next like 3 weeks, house hold items and food. IF I have to go out, thankfully I don't have to drive far to get to the closest grocery store. It looks like November is just going to be a hermit month for me. Eat and Work. Thankfully I have a home job, so I don't have to drive to work, but I may need to get to the UPS store during the month, and the bank and walmart and the grocery store. It will be kind of a depressing month, but I'll make the best of it I suppose. I had a trip planned for mid November to go down to Georgia to visit my dad and grandma and family down there, but now I can't do that, ugh. So yeah, depressing.

And my sister absolutely completely is unwilling to help me. She says ride the bus or just drive anyway. Had a few more txt's with her this evenning. She's being really mean and selfish about it, after all the things I've helped her with, she even had a flat tire once and I met her on the road and helped her, yet the one time I need help, she is unwilling. I'm really upset about it. I can tell you this, next time she needs something, I'm going to throw her answers right back at her.

 

[Captain Ice]

^For the local errands, you could take a cab. A few minutes wait time isn't terribly expensive (bank) and they'll make arrangements to come back and get you in an hour or two for the other errands.

For your trip, is it possible to take a bus/plane to Georgia or get your Dad or Grandma to drive up and get you?

 

[Brent]

^For the local errands, you could take a cab. A few minutes wait time isn't terribly expensive (bank) and they'll make arrangements to come back and get you in an hour or two for the other errands.

For your trip, is it possible to take a bus/plane to Georgia or get your Dad or Grandma to drive up and get you?

Thanks for the suggestions, I live in a small town, not really taxi cabs, and would be kinda weird. There is a local free bus system here I'm thinking about trying, but I'm not sure if there is a stop near where I live, and I'd hate dragging my groceries through it, but we'll see.

Can't really take a bus or plane, closest airport is 2.5 hours away one way or an hour the other way, and its just a connecting airport. So I'd still have to drive there. Again, no bus stops near me. Plus, it was just going to be for a short weekend, so really not worth it if I can't drive myself, I could see the costs raising quickly, so much cheaper just to drive myself, I'm just going to have to do without. Its sad, cause it was going to be the only Thanksgiving I got, heh.

 

[Kestra]

Take the bus for errands, see if they can move Thanksgiving to your place (or screw it and just have a simple meal yourself), and don't speed again.

 

[doubleohfive]

The other bad part about this, and the part that really gets to me (cause I can take things like this thrown at me) is the lack of family support up here. I have one family member, a sister, who lives up here in the same town, she's younger than me, currently 16 (technically half-sister, she lives with her mom), but she has a license and her own car, and I've just found out I can expect no support or help from her AT ALL.

What do you expect? She's 16. I'm sure the last thing she wants to do is chauffeur you around town because you don't pay attention to the speed limit. I could understand if this was a more serious situation -- you'd wrecked your car or were hurt and thus physically unable to operate a vehicle, but shitty as it all is I don't know that I blame her for not wanting to get stuck with this particular responsibility, especially if you're considerably older than her.

I called her, explained the problem and asked if she could help take me to places I need to go for November. Her answer? No. She said she has to drive herself to places and can't make the time for me. She told me to ride the local bus. WTF! Thanks a lot. So selfish.

I can see why you'd think she's being selfish ... but at the same time ... take a second and own up to your mistake here. It's not her fault this happened.

Now, I admit I'm speculating here but it sounds an awful lot like when you asked her for help, it was along the lines of "OMFG my car is being taken away from me for 30 days, drive me everywhere I need to go!" when it probably would have been better to go with something a little more practical, like "They won't let me drive for a month. I've worked out a schedule and a plan of alternative transportation but I could use some help on a few things, so if you're free would you be willing to drive me there?"

At least I know where I stand now with her, she doesn't care and is unwilling to help when I need it. Yet, I have certainly helped her in the past, such as taking her and her friends wherever they wanted to go when she couldn't drive, and then letting her drive my car whenever she wanted when she had her permit so she could practice, I've helped her so much in the past, and she can't turn around and do the same. It really makes me angry, and disappointed.

Did you point any of this out to her when she refused your request for help? What does her mother have to say about this? Where's your dad in this picture? Doesn't he have a say? Can't you just tough it out with the bus system, even if it means walking as well? Every time my car breaks down and I have to take it to the shop I'm relegated to local bus service out here because the closest relatives I have are 50+ miles away.

Alternatively, don't you have any friends who can help? And no, I don't mean in a "every day, every time" way -- can't you call a buddy to drive you to the grocery store and then take you home once a week?

And my birthday is on November 6th, but I won't be able to go anywhere.

Have a friend pick you up. Call a cab. Take the bus. Have a party at home and invite all your friends over.

And then Thanksgiving, I learned today that my sister and her mom are going to some friends house in Florida, and I'm not invited.

I must admit I'm morbidly curious as to how you determined you were not invited. Don't you have any co-workers or friends who can spare a seat at their table?

 

[doubleohfive]

^For the local errands, you could take a cab. A few minutes wait time isn't terribly expensive (bank) and they'll make arrangements to come back and get you in an hour or two for the other errands.

For your trip, is it possible to take a bus/plane to Georgia or get your Dad or Grandma to drive up and get you?

Thanks for the suggestions, I live in a small town, not really taxi cabs, and would be kinda weird.

Grow up. If you're going to post this thread and expect people to buy into the boohooing inherent to it and the situation you are describing, I'm pretty sure it should be obvious even to you that "it would be kinda weird" is a fairly shitty excuse to not use the suggested alternative.

There is a local free bus system here I'm thinking about trying, but I'm not sure if there is a stop near where I live, and I'd hate dragging my groceries through it, but we'll see.

Certainly this would be an ideal alternative, and even if it doesn't have any stops near you -- you'd still get some exercise out of walking. (the horror!)

 

[Deckerd]

I'm scratching my head here to see why you're so devastated. A FREE bus service? I wouldn't be using my car at all.

 

[Nardpuncher]

Yeah...this is not one of those situations where you stand slack-jawed with a WTF? expression and others are going to instantly side with you and say "Yeah dude...that does suck!"

 

[Brent]

^ your name suites you

 

[TheBrew]

I'm scratching my head here to see why you're so devastated. A FREE bus service? I wouldn't be using my car at all.

To be fair, bus serves in small towns call really, really, really suck.

 

[Lindley]

Hope you all don't mind a little ranting and raving from me today, I'm an emotional wreck. So a month ago I got a speeding ticket, clocked me at 71 MPH and the speed limit was 55 MPH. In my defense, I was in a rental car, more powerful than my own, I was going down hill down the mountain, it was a straight away, and there was no traffic, and I didn't know it was 55. The cop gave me a ticket and I had to go to court on October 18th. So, I went to court on October 18th and the judge found me guilty (I did explain the circumstances) so I paid the fine that day and that was that, or so I thought.

Did you have to go to court at all? Usually you can plead "uncontested" on speeding tickets, which is "better" than pleading guilty or being found guilty by a judge. I'm not sure if the 15MPH+ "automatic reckless" clause would still apply or not in that case.

But yeah, don't exceed 15MPH over the speed limit, especially if there aren't many cars on the highway. (So long as you're not going faster than those around you you're generally fine.)

An automatic 30-day suspension isn't even the worst you can get with a reckless in some states.

 

[Joshua Howard]

Sure it sucks! The point isn't that the fellow could ride the bus, or walk, or cart his rear around in a cab. The point is that when you are cruising along thinking that your life is sort of O.K. and then a big pain in the rear cuts your happy thoughts off and flushes them down the latrine, THAT is a real downer.

Just getting a ticket is enough to make most of us mad as heck, much less getting a suspended license. Being able to drive is one of the biggest psychological constants that we tend to rely on for a feeling of security. When you can't jump in your car and drive, it is a mind game... so really, this isn't just about how a fellow is going to get his groceries or whatever. It is about the psychological rough spot caused by this kind of an event, and I can relate to the feelings that the OP must be experiencing.