Episode 89 season 4 #21 "Ides of March"
IoM Commentary with Lucy & Renee, part 1:
These video commentaries seem such a cheat, since you only hear about a third of their comments. There's also an audio commentary which is complete from teaser to credits... and sometimes "into" the credits. This video commentary, for example, suffers from TPTB completely leaving out the women's comments on their "goodbye" scene in the prison. I'll try to pull them in, when appropriate.
I'm not being too successful finding the interviews in "one" spot, but here's the Hudson Leick clip.
Where to start?
Remember that comment I made in "Endgame" about getting 45 seconds of chuckles before being hit with 42 minutes of angst?
THIS time the chuckles come at the START of the teaser... as TPTB show us NOT the Olympian Tarturas... but the Judeo-Christian HELL. And guess who's stuck there for eternity...
Gabrielle: (The long haired version in the Bilious green sports bra with staff) "Who's suffering now, Callisto?" [Laughs and points to her own neck as Callisto ineffectually swings her sword att he false image]
Callisto: "No-o-o-o-o-o! Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h!"
Xena: "And you thought you were getting oblivion. Well, this place makes Tartarus look like a day at the beach. How long ya in for? Eternity? That's gotta smart."
[Laughs as Callisto again tries to kill her with the sword, but it passes through her body easily]
Callisto:
[Screams as Xena disappears. Another inmate comes up behind her and tries to grab some nookie. Instead he gets a fist in the face which knocks him backward] "Uh! Get over it!"
IoM Commentary with Lucy & Renee, part 2:
So. The "Lord" of Hell wants two things from Callisto. The first, naturally, is Xena. Get her off "The Way of the Warrior" so she ends up in his evil clutches once again. The second? Help Caesar achieve his destiny... Emperor of Rome to start then of the world. Once thus enthroned he'll be the Earthly puppet of the Lord of Darkness.
Hudson told TPTB she'd be Callisto once more, but INSISTED on getting a new costume. TPTB out did themselves, first with that bikini made with 3 square inches of cloth... and next with that simple white robe.
Lucy said it best, the main antagonist and protagonist made such a striking pair when they squared off against each other, one "dark and solid" the other "ethereal and light". It reminds me of Hudson's own commentary on "Sacrifice" when TPTB wanted her character to be a brunette, someone trying to emulate Xena in every way except her goodness. Hudson thought the contrast between her blondness and Xena's dark worked better, and I agree with both of them.
Callisto arrives in Caesar's bedchambers during a particularly erotic dream, one that turns into a nightmare when his bed partner turns into a knife wielding Xena. The "poor man" wakes up in a flop sweat, only to find Callisto at his side, ready to tempt him with his every imperial desire, and
relief from his
only terror.
Caesar: "Xena."
Callisto: "Yes, Xena. I can't tell you how much we have in common in that way."
Well, we're halfway through the teaser, so grab your popcorn cuz that means a fight is about to break out!
The women are looking for passage to Athens on a ship, because Gabrielle wants to find Eli who's teaching somewhere near there. Before the dock worker can enlighten them re: the next boat leaving, a spear comes flying at Xena! Poor Gabrielle, she looks from Xena to Amarise to Xena, not sure who to help, how to help, and STILL stay true to "her way". Once Amarise goes down, Gabrielle realizes tying up someone's feet and flipping them into the sea isn't "really" violent, and proceeds to do just that much to Amarise's displeasure. After dispatching the 4 or 6 guys attacking her, Xena discovers Caesar has put a 6 million dinar bounty on her head. (Hey, it was just 200 dinars 2 eps ago when the Bounty hunter died at Cyrene's) Loved Amarise's comment.
Amarise: "That's quite a temptation, (as the two women look at her)
not for me, for every killer in Europe."
And the teaser ends with Xena's fateful decision.
Its time to kill Caesar.
As act 1 begins, you can bet someone isn't too happy with Xena's plan.
Gabrielle: "Xena. Xena, you can't just walk into Rome and kill Caesar."
Amarise: "It's an opportunity to kill a lot of Romans. I say we do it."
Xena: "
We're not doing anything. I'm going to Rome,
not you. Gabrielle, I can't take you, not after that vision."
Amarise: "What vision?"
Xena: "I had a vision once that Gabrielle and I would die at the hands of Romans. It's bad enough that we can run into Romans anywhere, but if you and I were to go to Rome... "
Gabrielle: (Tries to pull out a tried and true relationship card) "OK... well, what if I ask you not to do this?"
Xena: (Isn't swayed by emotion when the facts are so dangerous) "Gabrielle, he's an evil man, and he's trying to kill me. I have to take him out or die trying. It's the way of the warrior."
Amarise: (
Tries to insert herself between the two women staring each other down)"Was I in this vision?"
Xena: (Stll looking at Gabrielle, willing her to understand?) "No."
Amarise: "Then I should go with you."
Xena: (Looking at Gabrielle) "Amarise, you're staying here with Gabrielle."
Amarise: (Looks like someone just told her there would be no Solstice present for her this year) "As her
bodyguard?"
Xena: (Looking at Amarise) "As her
friend. You could learn something if you listened to her once in a while.
(Gabrielle glances from Amarise to Xena, as Xena turns back to her with one last request.) You
promise you won't follow me?"
Gabrielle: (Pause) "I promise. Xena,
be careful.
I have to say, this was a great set up for the finale of season 4.
I know, I know, there's one more after this.. and I don't understand HOW they could have put it after this one, unless they were trying to fake out fandom that the program was jumping time periods permanently...
but I digress!
Xena goes to Rome, to assasinate Caesar. We've seen in season 3 how easy it is for her to get past his guards with a "frontal" assault, but this time she uses stealth, and inserts herself into his security detail. Standing outside his office she sees him placing a laurel wreath upon his head, the mark of a wannabe Emperor, and she sends her chakram flying into the office to remove that very head.
Alas, the
impossible happens. Someone has CAUGHT the chakram! In the last 4 years only one other person has done that, and Xena killed her with the hinds blood dagger last year.
Callisto: "Brings back memories... doesn't it, Xena?"
A fight ensues between Xena and more of Caesar's security detail as Callisto stands to the side with Xena's chakram firmly in hand. Caesar is also making himself small against the wall, avoiding any appearence of engaging in his own defense against the woman he's put a bounty on. Finally Xena vaults out of the window and down to the alley below, where she once again runs into Callisto.
(This is the scene that got Renee going in the commentary re: their chemistry and friction)
Xena: "Ah-h-h-h!"
(Tries ineffectively to kill Callisto with her sword.)
Callisto: "Don't bother. You've already done all the damage you can to me. Thanks, by the way."
Xena: "For what?"
Callisto: "I wanted to cease existing, and you did your best to help, but as you can see, it didn't take. They wouldn't let me off the hook that easy."
Xena: "Who's `they'?"
Callisto: (rolls her eyes innocently) "I don't know, whoever it is that does the final judging. They sent me to a place that makes Tartarus look like the Elysian Fields. They call it Hell."
Xena: "Couldn't have happened to a nicer gal."
Callisto: "The one who runs things down where I come from, he's very interested in what happens in this life. He figures Caesar will be very valuable to him. And, of course, he also figures you might be an obstacle."
Xena: "Then he figures right. And I won't be the only one. Plenty of people will oppose Caesar becoming emperor."
Callisto: "Ah,
you know about the emperor thing."
Xena: "The laurel wreath kind 'a gave it away. I'm guessing that he'll anounce it when the senate reconvenes on the
ides of March."
Callisto: "My, aren't you the clever girl? Yes, some people will be unhappy, but everybody has their price, even the honorable Brutus.
Caesar's gonna give him Gaul and that should keep him smiling. But it's you,
my darling, it's you that I'm worried about. I'm here to make you an offer."
Xena: "Forget it."
Callisto: "Afraid you'll be tempted?"
Xena: "Yeah
, that's right."
Callisto: "I'll give you a little hint. Gabrielle's in Roman hands as we speak."
Xena: "You
lie."
Callisto: "Do I? My lord gave me a thorough briefing as to what's happened to you and Gabrielle since the last time we met. I know everything about India and Eli. Ah-h, so
you're not the only clever girl now, Xena, are you? Gabrielle's on her way to a Roman prison in the Appenines as we speak. So about my offer... "
Xena: "Get lost." (And off she runs, in search of a fast horse to carry her to the Appenines...)
When Xena left for Rome, Gabrielle and Amarise continued on Gabby's original plan to seek out Eli. Amarise wasn't keen on looking for this preacher that encourages people to "love their enemies", but does look impressed when she sees Eli heal a cripple.
Gabrielle: "Eli."
Eli: "Oh-h-h-h. I'm so happy to see you."
(He envelopes Gabrielle in an intimate, prolonged embrace)
Gabrielle: (Looks up to him as she keeps her hand on his, while he continues to hold her face) "I heard you were teaching in Greece. I set out to find you."
Eli: "Where's Xena?"
Gabrielle: "She, um, has some work to do. This is my friend, Amarise."
Eli: "Hello, Amarise."
Amarise: (Steps back, refusing to shake hands/embrace) "If somebody threatened your mother, would you fight to defend her."
Gabrielle: "Amarise and I have some philosophical differences."
Eli: (Smiling as he leads Gabrielle away from Amarise) "I see. We've got a lot to talk about. Come on."
Eli and Gabrielle talk about the philosophy of healing, which means they talk about the philosophy of love. Amarise is bored to tears, but still vigilant enough to hear the sound of boot steps in the woods surrounding them. When she goes to investigate, 7 swords (?) come out of the brush, all pointing at her neck.
Amarise: "Oh, come on. The only real power's at the end of a sword.
Did you hear that?"
Gabrielle: (Hops up from her position next to Eli, and starts to walk towards Amarise)"What?"
Amarise: "Boots."
(Quietly she walks to the edge of their clearing, but before she can enter the woods, all those swords come out at her)
Eli: "And if the other side has more swords?"
Amarise: "If you can love your way out of this one, be my guest."
(This is another one of those scenes that I don't think would be as powerful without the mature looking shorthaired Gabrielle facing down her opponent)
Gabrielle: "Brutus."
Brutus: "Hello, Gabrielle."
Gabrielle: "You're doing Caesar's bidding again?"
Brutus: "Caesar believes Xena is trying to kill him. He has to protect himself."
Gabrielle: "
With me. I understand. Let these people go."
Brutus: "My orders are to arrest you, Eli, and his followers. You'll be taken as hostages, against Xena killing Caesar. Caesar's promised me no one will be hurt."
Gabrielle: "And you believe him."
Brutus: "Our friends are at war, Gabrielle. I'm sorry this brings us into conflict, but it's
inevitable."
Gabrielle: (Remember, Alti has shown Gabrielle that vision too!)
"Of course it is."
And off he marches them, to a prison at the base of Mount Amaro in the Appenines.
The road leading to the prison is lined with crosses... and there's a dead body on each and every one of them. Even Brutus looks shocked as he leads them into the prison fortress.
Once in the anteroom to the jail, Amarise has decided she's seen enough, and grabs at a dagger on one of the guards. She is shackled and easy for the three guards to subdue. As she falls to the ground, Gabrielle pays Amarise back for saving her last week and falls on top of her to protect her.
Brutus: "No! Don't harm Gabrielle!"
Gabrielle: (Mimicking what Brutus said to Xena when in Amazon chains last week) "Of course not! I'm still
useful to you, Brutus!"
Brutus: "Get up!"
(He doesn't realize that's NOT how to speak to a Queen)
Gabrielle: "Not until you pardon her for what she just did."
Brutus: (For her part, Amarise has the good sense to look worried AND keep her mouth shut!) "She attacked one of my men."
Gabrielle: (When you're right, you're RIGHT!) "And I remember a time when mercy was shown
to you!"
Brutus: "Put down your swords."
(Gabrielle gets up off Amarise as the soldiers pull the teenaged warrior roughly to her feet) "Chain her to the prop."
Amarise: (Now that she knows she's "safe" the snarky teenager comes out in her.) "Oh, please-- can't you just break my legs?"
Xena is on a borrowed/stolen horse, "running hell bent for leather" for the Appenines, as Gabrielle and Eli along with his followers practice meditation/prayer, much to Amarise's displeasure.
Meanwhile, Brutus and his men are returning to Rome. Brutus finds more than he bargained for during a pit-stop to stretch their legs, empty their bladders.
Xena: (Comes up behind the man in "midstream") "Pardon me, Brutus. I have a deal for you.
(He turns around to face Xena, with everything still hanging out. Xena looks him up and down and continues as if nothing was unusual about this conference) You tell me where my friend, Gabrielle, is, and I will give you some information that will save your stinkin' life. Deal?
(He says nothing) Tell you what, you promise to tell me and I will go first. Do I have your word?"
Brutus: "And you trust me?"
Xena: "Everyone says that Brutus is an honorable man. Do I have your word?"
Brutus: "Yeah."
Xena: "Beware the ides of March, Brutus."
Brutus: "Why the ides of March?"
Xena: "Because on that day, Caesar will declare himself emperor."
Brutus: "I don't believe you. Why would he do that?"
Xena: "Greed, lust for power, an ego the size of the Aegean. Of course, he plans to rid himself of anyone who would stand in his way."
Brutus: "What are you saying?"
Xena: "He's too smart to kill you in Rome You have much too much support there. But I have firsthand knowledge that he's been talking to assassins in
Gaul. So, your turn. Come on, Brutus.
Gabrielle saved your life, once.
Give me a chance to save hers."
Brutus: "I put her in a prison compound at the foot of Mt. Amaro."
(As she turns away, he shouts) "I don't believe what you said about Caesar!"
Xena: "It's your funeral."
(She starts to walk away then stops) "Brutus was it snowing on Mt. Amaro?"
Brutus: "Yes, it was snowing when I left."
(Xena Flashforwards yet again to the two of them laying on crosses as the snow falls.)
The Teenaged Warrior is sitting on the jail cell floor, shackled to a concrete pillar in the middle of the cell, and she's thinking out loud.
Amarise: "I always thought I'd die in
battle, not-- hung on a cross."
(She looks up to her adopted Queen, and her friend) "Do you think Xena will make it in time?"
Gabrielle: (Squatting next to the "Kid" as Gabrielle called her before they left the Amazons) "She'll
be here."
Watch Gabrielle's face as she walks away from Amarise to stand at the bars of the cell. She
KNOWS Xena will be "here". She
KNOWS this is where the vision said the two will die. You almost can see her wish Xena would not follow her "way"... would not come to Gabrielle's rescue, but you might as well wish for the sun not to rise in the east and set in the west.
So, Brutus makes it back to Rome, and
SHOCK of all shockers, he discovers Caesar has lied to him. He always planned to execute Gabrielle and Eli tomorrow, on the
Ides Of March, a day he needed Xena preoccupied elsewhere. When pressed, he only says he has "an announcement to make", then drops another bombshell. He's sending Brutus to Gaul. THAT'S where Xena said the assassins were!