#1 news story of all time

[Mutai Sho-Rin]

If Jesus came back in the flesh, he wouldn't last two days. He would be so unlike the judgemental hatemonger that the right wing have painted him to be that one of them would shoot him. The Prince of Peace murdered by some fanatic so they can continue lying in his name.

I voted for Alien life, BTW.

 

[RoJoHen]

^I feel like Jesus would come back prepared with energy weapons and a personal shield. He has to be aware of the world he's returning to.

 

[Plecostomus]

^I feel like Jesus would come back prepared with energy weapons and a personal shield. He has to be aware of the world he's returning to.

Read the Book Of Mormon. He don't need any of that, he's almost as bad-ass as Captain Robau.

 

[farmkid]

Yeah..even I, the OP, haven't voted yet. I can see your point but I also see the Alien intelligence as well...I am leaning ALIEN INTEL because if there were a real Jesus it would mean that we are the center of the universe and all that and that, but it means the ultimate answers spring from something that has a connection to us..our God..

Intelligent Alien life would trump that because, more than likely, it would discount all religions and would also show us that we are not alone in the universe..

Rob

Many, but not all. There are some whose doctrine supports the idea of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe. I suspect many of the others would alter their doctrine somewhat to make it compatible with the discovery.

 

[RobertScorpio]

Yeah..even I, the OP, haven't voted yet. I can see your point but I also see the Alien intelligence as well...I am leaning ALIEN INTEL because if there were a real Jesus it would mean that we are the center of the universe and all that and that, but it means the ultimate answers spring from something that has a connection to us..our God..

Intelligent Alien life would trump that because, more than likely, it would discount all religions and would also show us that we are not alone in the universe..

Rob

Many, but not all. There are some whose doctrine supports the idea of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe. I suspect many of the others would alter their doctrine somewhat to make it compatible with the discovery.

I think you have a good point...religion, like evolution, seems to adapt quite well...

Rob

 

[RAMA]

Yeah..even I, the OP, haven't voted yet. I can see your point but I also see the Alien intelligence as well...I am leaning ALIEN INTEL because if there were a real Jesus it would mean that we are the center of the universe and all that and that, but it means the ultimate answers spring from something that has a connection to us..our God..

Intelligent Alien life would trump that because, more than likely, it would discount all religions and would also show us that we are not alone in the universe..

Rob

Many, but not all. There are some whose doctrine supports the idea of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe. I suspect many of the others would alter their doctrine somewhat to make it compatible with the discovery.

I think you have a good point...religion, like evolution, seems to adapt quite well...

Rob

Religion adapts badly, but people are willing to have faith in almost anything.

I will vote for alien life...because it'll either show how much better or worse we can be. Either way it will change us.

RAMA

 

[JuanBolio]

Time machine, aliens, dinosaurs, cancer, Jesus.

Time machine beats out aliens because then we could just look into the future and see if they're there. Or the past. Same for dinosaurs. And Jesus.

 

[Roshi]

Breaking News: THERE IS NO GOD!!!11!!eleven!

Yep, spelled that way.

 

[RAMA]

Time machine, aliens, dinosaurs, cancer, Jesus.

Time machine beats out aliens because then we could just look into the future and see if they're there. Or the past. Same for dinosaurs. And Jesus.

yeah but the aliens might have a BETTER time machine...

 

[Zulu Romeo]

The Moon splitting in two.

Thousands lose eyesight after moon particles damage eyes in manner of gigantic pizza pie. Top scientists describe phenomenon as "Amore".

 

[miraclefan]

"Obama assassinated" would be on the front page of practically every single newspaper and breaking news on most tv channels worldwide.

Like FOX News doesn't already have that story written up & ready to print

WOW somebody wears there politics on there sleeve.

 

[JuanBolio]

Time machine, aliens, dinosaurs, cancer, Jesus.

Time machine beats out aliens because then we could just look into the future and see if they're there. Or the past. Same for dinosaurs. And Jesus.

yeah but the aliens might have a BETTER time machine...

So we won't have the hottest ride at the Intergalactic Cross-Temporal Time Machine Show, but at least we're in.

 

[Plecostomus]

Time machine, aliens, dinosaurs, cancer, Jesus.

Time machine beats out aliens because then we could just look into the future and see if they're there. Or the past. Same for dinosaurs. And Jesus.

yeah but the aliens might have a BETTER time machine...

So we won't have the hottest ride at the Intergalactic Cross-Temporal Time Machine Show, but at least we're in.

We'll be the rednecks in the corner with the cranky steam-powerd contraption made from Buick parts and Rockwell spacecraft, and we'll piss off the delegation from Deneb by borrowing tools from them and not returning them.

 

[Colonel Green]

The biggest news of all time was the first Moon landing.

Seems to me that the moon landing was pretty insignificant compared to things like the fall of the Roman Empire (possibly not applicable as there was no "news" in the modern sense), the Russian Revolution, the outbreak of WW2, the detonation of the first atom bomb or a host of other things.

The moon landing didn't really change people's lives or the world as a whole in any meaningful way. That said, it WAS pretty cool.

*edit* Of the offered options, I'd definitely have to go with alien contact. That would trump any of the items I listed.

 

[farmkid]

Of the offered options, I'd definitely have to go with alien contact. That would trump any of the items I listed.

I don't know. The effect of alien contact on your life (if any) ends the day you die. The return of Christ and the implications thereof effects you for eternity.

 

[Red Ranger]

Voted for "contact with intelligent life." Such an event would change everything we know about the universe and humanity's place in it. We would no longer be alone. I also would venture it could even spawn a whole new religion to take into account intelligent life in the entire universe. -- RR

 

[miraclefan]

yeah but the aliens might have a BETTER time machine...

So we won't have the hottest ride at the Intergalactic Cross-Temporal Time Machine Show, but at least we're in.

We'll be the rednecks in the corner with the cranky steam-powerd contraption made from Buick parts and Rockwell spacecraft, and we'll piss off the delegation from Deneb by borrowing tools from them and not returning them.

That's so true!

 

[TheLonelySquire]

The Moon splitting in two.

Cheesus Christ!

 

[trekkerguy]

And somehow they will still blame Bush...

Rob

And with good reason.

http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=217694&title=why-are-you-such-a-dick-audio

Perfection.

 

[Niorah]

For better or worse, I think the biggest news would be the contact with alien life.

We either get exterminated, or we really leap into a new level of existence thanks to their help.