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My Grandmother Passed Away Tonight

tomalak301

Fleet Admiral
Premium Member
I'm not sure how to begin this, but I really needed a place to write and maybe get some prayers and condolences tonight. When I got home from work, I found out that my Grandmother passed away. I had gone to the hospital this morning and found out about her dementia (She might have suffered a stroke on Saturday, I'm not sure) and she was mumbling and I just had a feeling the time had come. You can't ever prepare for a moment like this, but man I'm so glad I went down to see her today. The next few days are going to be so tough. :(

RIP :(
 
I'm sorry, SJ. I lost two grandparents myself last summer. For me, the best thing to ease the pain of losing a loved-one is to think of the happiness, humor, and love they brought while alive.

Prayers aren't really my thing, but I have something else to offer. I've lost a lot of loved ones, and when I think of them I sometimes reread this for a bit of comfort and peace. I hope you can find some comfort in it too:

You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.

And at one point you'd hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.

And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.

And you'll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they'll be comforted to know your energy's still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you're just less orderly. Amen.

-Aaron Freeman.
 
I'm very sorry for your loss. :( It's good that you got a chance to be with her at the end. I wish you and your family the best.
 
My condolences on your loss, SJSharksfan. May you be comforted by the memories. :(
 
My condolences to you and your family, SJ. :( I've lost both my grandmothers in the past. These will be sad days for you, but I promise that you will one day be able to look back on the good days and smile.
 
Oh, I am so very sorry. My grandmother died twenty years ago and I still remember how sad those first few weeks were. But you will also have memories that you will treasure forever.
 
Thanks for the Kind words everyone. It means so much during this difficult time.

TSQ,

That was an interesting article.
 
My condolences. I've been watching my partner's grandmother slip away from dementia and it is not an easy thing.
 
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my Grandma in October. She had broken her hip and been put in a nursing home for rehabilitation. She had dementia, but as long as she was home and on her regular schedule she was fine. There she just quickly deteriorated. I had spent nearly every Friday of my life as soon as I could drive or didn't have class driving her to town to get her hair done. Towards the end she wasn't really herself anymore other than a few moments where she seemed to emerge for lack of a better word. I at least take comfort that she didn't live long like that. Fridays are still weird for me though.
 
I am sorry. You are, by no means, alone, in this type of loss, or grief. My grandfather's death affected me, deeply. He was a prick to my dad and his brothers, when they were growing up. But with me and the other grandkids he had, he was always really cool and ended up being very important to me. Rarely, even now, my father will say, "you remind me so much of your grandfather," and I'm never sure, exactly how he means that ... but I appreciate it. I surely do.
 
I am sorry to hear about your loss. I still remember the night my own maternal grandmother passed away. I was 13 years old at that time. I remember her being kind to me. I will never forget that.
 
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