Caption Contest 115: Voyager Problems

[Captain Kathryn]

Sorry it took me so long to update, I've been so busy! My apologies for the delay.

Here are the winners and the new captions for the next contest!

Note: I know we have been using "Captionated Award" for an additional special caption that is especially funny, but I think it would be nice to broaden it to include maybe 3 extras. I'm gonna work on this for the next contest.

Enjoy~!

EMH: Where's Tuvix? And why does this lamb shank taste like hedgehog?

Kim: Do you want to tell the Captain she forgot her clothes?
Paris: Just let her be Kim.

Paris (thinking): At least I don't have to eat it now.

BERMAN (Off screen): Good news everybody! Next year we're adding a hot female Borg to the cast!
BELTRAN (Thinking): Crap. I'm gonna get fired.
DAWSON (Thinking): Crap. I'm gonna get fired.
MCNEIL (Thinking): Crap. Garrett's gonna get fired.
WANG (Thinking): Crap. If I don't bribe People magazine quick, I'm gonna get fired.

EMH: "I love the smell of illicitly gained panties in the morning."

LOL this made me spit out my coffee when I first read it.

EMH: "I wonder if this smells anything like what the Rock was cooking?"

-

New captions are up! Have a rollicking good time!
The images are a little bigger this time because I didn't resize them for this one. I am having trouble logging into my hosting site so these are from TrekCore. Enjoy!

 

[Nebusj]

``Captain, is that an ethnic joke you're doing?''

``I-SAID-MY-GENIE-IS-HARD-OF-HEARING!''

``So, long story short, I guess we both picked the wrong week to fall in the French fry grease.''

``… and you'll be whisked away from Los Angeles to the fabulous Delta Quadrant for a seven-year, six-summer-break tour --- part of a fabulous Showcase package that can be yours but only if The Price Is Right!''

``This is why we were supposed to clean out the fridge before leaving the Alpha Quadrant!''

 

[T'Girl]

First in line: "Stop singing and give me my damned smartphone already."

 

[bbjeg]

Thanks for the pick!

Chekote: How you plan on pulling off that BS of finding a way home though Borg space is beyond me.
Janeway: Oh yeah, forgot about them.

Neelix: So you were saying what's the worst that could happen?

Kim: No wonder Picard dislikes you, like you couldn't make some girls for me.
Q: I did make them for you.
Kim: ...sigh...

Doctor: That's not a sporocystian lifeform, it's Neelix's dropping.
Kes: Why is it glowing?

 

[Triskelion]

TFTW Ghost of Tuvix!

Chak: You want a tattoo just like mine? First, fall asleep in a sweat lodge and wake up with a bunch of penises on your forehead.

Neelix: The doctor says my body's rejecting my suit.

Q: When you're omnipotent you can make socks with sandals hip.
Chick: Ok....

EMH: Dammit! No matter what I try I can't reverse engineer Hot Pockets! The ingredients just aren't found in this galaxy.
Kes: I'll inform the captain.

 

[JirinPanthosa]

CHAKOTAY: So...come here often?

DOCTOR: I've programmed a new medical assistant for myself, to help out with the routine medical issues and argue with Lt Paris. I call him, Mini-me.

CHAKOTAY: So that's what happens when you do it with a Bolian.
NEELIX: Yep.

GARRETT WANG: How can the Trekkie girls like you better than me? You were in what, twelve episodes total?
JOHN DE LANCIE: I put effort into my character.
GARRETT WANG: What does that have to do with anything?

KES: You tried to microwave the Caretaker?
DOCTOR: I added cooking subroutines to my program to win an argument with Neelix. They're a work in progress.

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHAKOTAY: We made it. Earth! It only took a week.

JANEWAY: Crap, can't we go back? I'll need at least seven years to figure out an explanation on how I lost half my crew and replaced them with wanted criminals.

KES: So that's what happens when you put a tribble in the microwave.

Wow, over a century out here. Who would have thunk it would wind up with just the two of us left, Chakotay?

I'm Janeway, you idiot!

 

[Mistral]

Kes: "Is that Neelix's brain!?!"

Doctor: "Yes. He wasn't using it anyway."

 

[hux]

Janeway: the pressure is too much....i need to squeeze this stress toy
Chakotay: that's not a stress toy

EMH: It's been a long road.....getting from there to here

Chakotay: i can hardly see
Neelix: that's nothing...i'm currently defecating....look, some of it is dripping down my trouser leg

Q: and what would you like for christmas, young lady
Harry: Q, you said i'd be next

EMH: and this is where we keep Chakotay's balls
Kes: my god, that explains it

 

[Nerys Myk]

Gotta go. I got a date with a black monolith.

 

[R. Star]

Chakotay: You know when I was blowing things up, I'd use these things called timers. Then we could've used the Array, gotten home and then blown it up.
Janeway: Oh.... oops.

Doctor: Introducing the singing hologram!
Person in Line: Is it fully functional?
Doctor: Programmed in multiple techniques.
Person in Line: I'll take ten!

Beltran: Now they're just screwing with us.
Phillips: Last time I ask for something out of the ordinary.

Kim: Are you trying to make me feel pathetic?
Q: Try? You can't even pick up hologirls that are -programmed- to find you interesting and attractive. You -are- pathetic, no effort required my boy. Now go get me another drink from that bar rodent.

Kes: What is that?
Doctor: Apparently tonight's dinner. The crew threatened to mutiny after the last round of food poisoning unless I certified everything safe to eat... fortunately for this appealing isn't the same as safe.

 

[Triskelion]

EMH: Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.
Hologram: GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A PLEASANT TOMORROW!!!
Fan: These audio books for the hard of hearing are just terrific.

 

[IzzyAtWarp9]

...
Chakotay: Say what now?

Oh my god loooook! It's a tiny widdle me! Isn't he just the cuuuutest!

EMH: I told you , Kes, it had to be 2 minutes exactly!
Kes: I didn't think a few seconds would matter!
EMH: It's a microwave meal; what were you expecting?

 

[2takesfrakes]

"It's the Borg, Captain."

"... Always with the Borg."

 

[2takesfrakes]

"Hey, babes, is that Harry Kim boring you? Come with me, I'm from another planet."

 

[2takesfrakes]

"Kes, I asked you for a CAT scan of The Gamester of Triskelion. What happened?"

 

[2takesfrakes]

"I'm not signing that! Sorry folks, no more autographs!!!"

 

[Triskelion]

Chaks: - and then my people burn incense and make love to Jewel mix tapes.
Janes: What did you say the name of that tribe was?
Toms: You make love - to the tapes?

 

[Captain Kathryn]

After reading Triskelion/Skully's caption I realized WHY THE HELL IS Q WEARING SOCKS WITH SANDALS? I mean...come on it's the 24th century!

Reminds me of the time while watching TNG and Data's cat had kittens "by accident". Soooo...I guess they don't have spay/neuter in that century? O_O

 

[Isolinear]

Janeway: I...... oh my....
Chakotay: I guess now we know how ensign Kim spends the nightshift. Tuvok, please restore screensaver-2 to its original parameters...