TNG Caption This! 260: Surprise!

[LeadHead]

Happy Saturday Everyone! Glad that you all seem to have enjoyed our April Fools diversion, but now, time to get back to normal!

First up to the plate, the "How many were there for real, now?" Award, going to:

Six: "OK, I'm biased, but there WERE six lights!"

Next in the batting order, we have "The Most Popular mid-day show that people leave on while they're doing House Chores Show" Award, going to:

Woman: All rise! Divorce court is now in session!

Hoping for a Base Hit, we have the "Can we just get onto the mission already?" Award, going to:

Apollo: "-2 meter exhaust port. Hey, pay attention, will ya?"

Starbuck: "Come on, everyone with a pulse has seen Star Wars. We know what to do, Lee."

Batting Cleanup, we have the "This is a BSG themed contest, so somebody had to say Frak eventually" Award, going to:

"I will not do the hoky-poky. I will not turn myself about. Frak you."

Trying to bring home a runner, we have the "Healthy Choices" Award, going to:

PARK (thinking): Maybe I could put on a pound or two.

Our Photoshop award goes to:

Apollo: "Okay, okay, okay. I get it, my bad. Starting tomorrow the ban on coffee at morning briefings is lifted."

Thanks to everyone who participated and Congratulations to our winners! I hope you enjoyed this trip into another series, I wonder where I'll go with this next year...

And now, the new contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Troi: I sense you are about to be in pain...

Picard: Mister Worf, I know that you're proud of your staring contest skills, but I don't think Geordi is the best opponent for you...

Riker: So is that the "Engage" button?

Wesley: No.

Riker: That one?

Wesley: No.

Riker: What about that one?

Wesley: No.

Riker: Which one is it?

Wesley: It changes every episode.

Picard: Until someone find a way out of this nebula, I will be using my pouty face.

Troi: ZOMBIES!!!!

 

[Mojochi]

After having enough empathic sensings from men wanting to sex her up, Troi was about to get some use out of that Kirk-fu course she took at the academy

The crew were understandably confused when they found out that Worf's sash was for runner up in the Miss Qo'Nos beauty pagent

Riker: Your hands are really smooth & feminine looking. How limber are they?

Geordi knew better than most that nothing annoyed Picard more than people stiing down before him

Troi: Strange.... I should have probably sensed someone was trapped behind that door.... & I now that I think about it, I should probably be helping them with opening the door, right now. Well, they're almost done now. I think I'll just stand here looking stupid. Good call

 

[Gepard]

Thanks for the win LeadHead!

In addition to counseling, Troi was also a licensed chiropractor.

PICARD: I've taken care of our "little problem." In unrelated news, if Starfleet asks where Melkon VII went just shrug and say you don't know.

 

[Mistral]

"...and if you press that one it opens the security camera feed from Counselor Troi's shower."

 

[Mistral]

"You told me you had that camera disabled!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Oh and get that empath chick up here. I need someone to state the obvious......

She's right behind me, isn't she?

WORF: I'll have you know in the Empire, passing gas is a high compliment.

RIKER: And then after saving the princess, the planet and possibly the Galaxy I.... hey, are you getting all this, ensign?


WES: (drowsily) Wha? Yeah....princess...saving....

STEWART: And this of course, is the "serious business" face.

BURTON: Man, I wish studied with the Royal Shakespeare Company!

 

[Finn]

Picard: All those who had relations with Tasha Yar, sit down...

 

[Nerys Myk]

ANNOUNCER: Next time on Shakespeare: The Next Generation...


CAESAR: Et tu, Brute! Then fall, Caesar.

 

[Holdfast]

MARINA SIRTIS (thinking, just before the screencap): I swear, one more story about the RSC and...
PATRICK STEWART: Of course, Marina, if you'd worked with the RSC, you wouldn't get so many comments about your acting.

WORF (to LA FORGE): Now I must kill you.
DATA: Is this another example of obscure Klingon ritual, Mr Worf?
WORF: No.
PICARD: Permission Granted.

Riker & Wesley play Kinect Girls Shower Room.

DATA: It's as bad as we feared, Captain. The nebula's colour does clash with your uniform.

TROI: They're hee-ere....

 

[Captain Crow]

Picard: There are four li...

Troi: ENOUGH!

Worf: Your in my spot Geordi. Get out of it before I snatch that banana clip off your face and shove it up your ass.

Picard: I see your anger management is working well Mr. Worf.

Data: There appears to be something emanating large amounts of methane on gas the bridge.

[they look at Worf]

Worf: What?

Riker: That's the shuttle with the Chief of Starfleet Operations onboard isn't it.

Wesley: Yup.

[Riker leans on console. Several button sounds heard]

Riker: Oopsie doodle.

[Sound of a photon torpedo firing followed moments later by an explosion]

Wesley: Well it was the shuttle with the Chief of Starfleet Operations onboard.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "As you probably already know, Deanna, I am not romantically attracted to your mother. I was wondering, though, if she might be amenable to a 'friends with benefits' kind of arrangement."

Riker: "I don't want to have to tell you this again, Wes! No texting while driving!"

 

[Isis]

LeadHead, TFTW.

Picard's decision to save money by skipping the Enterprise's quarterly fumigation proved to be an unsatisfactory one.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Troi decided that the only way for Riker to get command was to take out Picard "Klingon style".

 

[Gil T.Azell]

(Riker & Wesley scroll through the old Porn Hub Site )
Riker: "That one!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

RIKER: Wait, that's what the fat kid from "Stand By Me" looks like now?

Sucks to be you, eh?

 

[inflatabledalek]

Picard was so good at Marco Polo Troi had to resort to extreme measures to win.

Picard: What's wrong with your face?

Data: It's Mr Worf Sir, remember, the Klingon?

Picard: Why are you gold?

Wesley: Sir... what's that pressing into my back?

Riker: Don't ask questions. Just prepare to rock back and forth when that torpedo hits.

Picard: Why can't we find a nebular that doesn't look like the one from The Wrath of Khan?

Troi: What the fuck happened to the lights?

 

[Isis]

Picard: "Who gets to be turbolift operator? If I choose, I'll never hear the end of it. Why don't you use rock-paper-scissors-lizard-Spock or something?"

 

[Isis]

The turbolift on the Enterprise was so slow that not only did Troi completely miss her "daytime" shift, but she was late for dinner as well.

 

[Cmdr.Druss]

Troi: IT'S NOT PMS!!

Picard: How come i'm the only red-shirt on this away mission?

Riker: Okay, now trade your 'Shield of Fire' for 'Armour of the Gods' and your ready to go on the quest. You are a level 10 warrior-mage right?"

Picard: Okay to go over the rules one last time: the floor is lava. GO!

Troi: I sense someone wants to get through the door.