TNG Caption This! 254: Season 7; Lets bring it home now...

[LeadHead]

Happy Saturday to everyone! Before I go any further, THANKS TO EVERYONE for this week's contest! It's always a pleasure to run the contest, but it's always extremely wonderful as when there's many, many entries! Thanks!

First up to the plate, we have the "Well, we has trying to ride a bicycle while he was falling off that log" Award, going to:

Picard: "Trust me Captain, remember how you used to let me drive the ship every week? It's like falling off a log". You must have fallen of that log bloody hard Mr. LaForge...

Next, we have the "Lack of Doctor-Patient Confidentiality" Award, going to:

Dr. Crusher: "Will, your right hand musculature appears to be badly cramped. Have you been doing any highly repetitive gripping and sliding motions, as if you were sanding a wooden oar?"

Next, we have the "The Facepalm that broke LeadHead" Award, going to:

A mime is a terrible thing to waste.

Next, we have the "For asking that question, you're gonna be sent to a Turkish Prison, Number One" Award, going to:

Riker: "So, do you like movies about gladiators?"

Next, we have the "Sonic Weaponry" Award, going to:

"Commander Riker's smooth jazz album was released in stores throughout Alaska this morning. There were no survivors."

Our Photoshop Award goes to:

Q's latest prank: showing off all the numerous alternate realities created by continuity errors.

DATA: A black and grey uniform, sir?

GEORDI: No offense, but that will never catch on.

Congratulations to all of our winners! Many thanks to everyone who participated! This week, we finish our journey through the seasons of TNG! Lets go!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Riker: There! Don't step in that!

Ro: (whispering) Bald is beautiful... I'm dating Sisko now...

Data: Computer, run program: Emergency Part Guests.

Nechayev: Captain, the Starfleet Human Resources Department has received a record Number of Sexual Harassment Complaints.

Riker: About me?

Nechayev: No, Deanna Troi.

Worf: So let me get this straight, I should feel free to date her, but I need to remember that she's your "If all else fails" girl.

Riker: Exactly.

Troi: I'm sitting right here boys!

 

[Nerys Myk]

RIKER: There's that Wascally Wabbit

RO ( whispering): By the way, I'm a dude.

RIKER: You should really give up on Chat Roulette. All you ever get are nutty Admirals

WORF: If you're not palming cards, what's that under your hand?

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Nechayev: "Honestly, Jean Luc, why don't you get rid of that pompous ass Riker and get yourself a real first officer? Ohhhh...he's right behind me, isn't he."

Worf: "I couldn't help but notice, Commander, that you never decide whether to raise or fold until after you check which ear your empath girlfriend is touching!"

 

[Mr. Adventure]

Picard's meetings with Riker became more tolerable after downloading the new Babealyzer app.

For the last time, I'm not drinking out of your horny cup.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Can't it wait, Numbah One? I'm in the middle of watching Star Trek.

 

[T'Girl]

.

Worf: "Those females have paused in their journey to bathe in that pond."
Riker: "What's that one doing?"
Worf: "The large breasted one is apparently removing her brassiere."

Ro: "You're supposed to be negotiating my price, not adjusting my boobs."

Data: "What is this, it smells ... odd?"
Worf: "It is jh'[click]'bh45j."
Deanna: "And that is?"
Worf: "Urine of the Host."
Data: "Interesting color."

Riker: "Who is it this week?"
Picard: "Admiral Nechayev."
Riker: "The TrekBBS babe of the week thread has really gone down hill recently."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Ro: "Oh! No! No, no, no! There's not enough quatloos in the galaxy to make that happen!"

 

[Ln X]

Worf: Commander, there is a whole army of Borg out there dressed in tutus!
Riker: Worf what have I told you about taking those hallucinogenic drugs? It's frickin grass your dumbass!

Ro: Together we will boldly go where no couple has gone before and explore strange, new and licentious pleasures. All for a price and one night of course.

Data: Interesting this drink has a certain strong aroma.
Troi: That's because I spiked it with Will's piss.
Worf: (chokes and gags)
Troi: It's rather sweet-tasting actually...

Riker: How serious is it?
Picard: The admiral has ordered me to be personally strip-searched by her to prove that I have nothing to hide.
Riker: Christ! That is bad!

Worf: Commander I don't think we have had the opportunity to date yet.
Riker: I've been meaning to talk to you about that, for one thing we do have different sexial organs.
Worf: That will not be a problem.
Beverly: If you ask me you and Worf are very much alike...
Riker: What? We're not at all alike!
Worf: I have to disagree.
Troi: (sighs) Will if you want to have him just say so, when it comes to romance you're hopeless at bluffing...

 

[Finn]

For the first time, Picard was glad children were able to get into his ready room with black markers.....

 

[Holdfast]

some funny winners last week.

RIKER: There's the girls' campsite!
WORF: Songs will be sung of this hunt.

RO: Try touching me there again, and I'm defecting from Starfleet.

WORF: It's... fizzy.
TROI: Just think of it as the final breath of a grape enemy.

RIKER: Hot? Or not?
PICARD: Not.

TROI: Worf, please, we're all exhausted. Beverly's arm is cramping, Geordi's fallen asleep behind that visor, and I'm sensing my own rising homicidal intent. Just play. Will is not going to blink first.

 

[Finn]

I met this guy named Magneto....

 

[Nerys Myk]

TROI: So Worf, you say you programmed this holo all by yourself?

 

[Sokath]

Cup: Don't do it, Captain!

 

[boco]

Riker: Look,it's McCoy's white rabitt!

WORF: Here's one for Charles Tucker!
Troi: Who's Tucker?
Worf: You'll find out in a few years..

Riker: She won the starfleet beauty contest for women and I must take her to dinner.
Picard: Merde.I suppose now you want me to tell het that the ship's engines are down..

 

[free2131]

Riker: "No Worf, I'm pretty sure we parked the shuttle over there."

Ro: "So, the clinic called back, and... you may want to talk to Dr. Crusher."

Troi: "There isn't enough Saurian brandy in the galaxy to get me to run 'Vulcan Love Slave II: The Revenge' with you two.

Picard: "So Will, what did you think of my new wallpaper?"

Riker: "All we're saying Worf is that SOMEBODY farted. And we have an empath."

 

[boco]

Ro; Is that your phaser touching my leg under the table?

 

[Finn]

Troi: I look forward to your reports when we get back to the past.

Worf: This drink should be illegal!

 

[Gary7]

Thanks for the win, Leadhead.

Worf: "What the? Commander, what are you doing with your hand?"
Riker: "Isn't it obvious? I'm pointing at that peculiar thing I saw before that is now hiding in the bushes. What is your tricorder picking up?"
Worf: "Do not sidestep my inquiry--I mean your OTHER hand!"

Ro: "And now you're supposed to massage my loins for the next 30 minutes, to prove your interest is genuine."

The drink Worf concocted was so bad, even the holodeck simulation wouldn't stick around.

Riker: (thinking) I can't believe how easily he caves to Admiral Nechayev, like a whimpering school boy who displeased his mommy.

Riker: "You can't cash in your chips, Worf. Remember, there's no such thing as money in the 24th century."
Worf: "Then why do we play? It is pointless!"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Worf: "If you do not stop whistling those notes from Close Encounters of the Third Kind, I will kill you where you sit... sir."
Troi: "He's got a point, Will. That stopped being funny four hours ago."