Wow, I bet many of the folks here bending over backwards to explain Nero's awkward motivations are the same ones criticizing Nemesis because Shinzon's make no sense.
I know a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, but sheesh....
Star Trek: Serious Business.

No comment on Nemesis though. Haven't seen it.
Star Trek VI had Kirk in prison. Not only was he still angry at the Klingons for the death of his son, not only was he probably angry at being wrongfully imprisoned, but he also knew that there was a price on his head. And yet despite all that added stress, he still had time to reflect and figure out why he was so angry, why his anger was misplaced, and come to terms with it. Funny how he managed to do that in a matter of days but Nero couldn't even after 25 years. Oh, and unlike Kirk, he can actually prevent the very event that angered him in the first place.
Kirk did not witness his planet being destroyed by a supernova. Kirk didn't loose every single person close to him. Kirk also, in STV, was having a jolly good ol' time party with the Klingons until Meyer, Pinn, and Nimoy were like " Oh wait, yeah, we need him to still hate the Klingons for his son for story conflict ".
Kirk had 10 years of dwelling on the death of his son to really come to terms with his dealings with the Klingons. Kirk also had a support system, he had Spock constantly reminding him to let go of the anger and to go forth with peace. Nero did not have that, instead he had a crew of equally angered and pissed off Romulans feeding each other the hate, regret, and resentment. Kirk witnessed and realized that it was not only the Klingons that turned their back on peace but the Federation as well. It gave him a wake up call to realize that it was not only just one side willing to bring everything to shit. That scenario did not even apply to Nero.
You're sort of comparing apples to oranges here. The more reasonable comparison, again, is Nero to Khan which you completely blown over.
You're trying to rationalize an irrational being. That in itself is moot. It's like telling a murderer " Hey, stop killing people. I wouldn't do that if I were you " or trying to tell a someone who's criminally insane to stop collecting the hands of women.It makes a huge difference. Now he has an opportunity to change history. The fact that the event is still fresh in their minds is irrelevant. Why? Because he has time to not only get over it, but come up with a way to prevent it.
That logic just does not apply in this situation or even in that one.
That is what you would do but you're not in that situation nor are you in Nero's situation. How would you know that you would act rationally and not emotionally towards the death of someone dear to you? No one knows. I do not even know why you are trying to keep pushing this rational logic in a chaotic, emotional, situation.But he does have a resource. He has time. If my friend is killed in a car accident and I jump back in time 1 hour, that gives me only one hour to figure out how to save him. But if I jump back a month or a year, I have all the time in the world to come up with a plan.
He destroyed the Federation fleet because he had the Red Matter on board. He destroyed the Federation fleet because they all fell into a trap. They were unprepared to be attacked by an alien ship -- you're missing a key point here: Everyone was going to Vulcan on a rescue mission to potentially evacuate all the people on the surface, or make an attempt. They all flew into a trap and got owned.But he does have the tools. The moment he got out of prison and reclaimed his ship, he could've gone about preventing the destruction of his planet. He didn't need to wait for Spock or get his hands on the red matter. Look how easily his ship destroyed the Federation fleet. When you have knowledge of the future and a ship that can easily outmatch any other adversary, how can you claim to be powerless to prevent a disaster? With that ship, he could've taken over Romulus. And knowing that the star would go nova someday, he'd have plenty of time to either prevent it or get all the Romulans out in time.
If the fleet was prepared they probably could have taken down the Narada.
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