Star Trek XI Caption Contest #23: Big Stars

[LeadHead]

McCoy: I need to shave, I look like a klingon.

Kirk: We don't know if that's true yet.

Uhura: Spock, stop trying to impress me by beating up Kirk!

Sarek: Ummmm... Ms. Uhura, I don't think his repeated spankings were meant for your benefit.

Kirk: Welcome aboard everyone, almost all of you moved up to your positions because your predecessors were killed or disabled. But I'm sure we'll all do just fine. I have nothing but faith in all of you.

Officer falls over

Kirk: Cleanup in aisle 3.

 

[Mistral]

[/QUOTE]

Kirk: "I'm gonna screw every non-human female we meet so the rest of you can relax now."

Sulu: (OS) "Thank God!"

 

[UFO]

McCoy: Sure fire method huh? I could have smuggled the booze that way!

 

[Woulfe]

Stars On A Trek To The Top 2010 Nearly The End Of Year Edition

Karl : Yea, I channeled De Kelly big time, what of it ?

Zoe : I make this look easy, don't I ?

Chris : I make this look good, even with lens flare across me.

 

[Isis]

That phrase. I don't think it means what you think it means...

Kirk: "Belay that order."

Kirk (to self): "The person who came up with that phrase is a genius. It lets me bark orders and sound important whenever the mood strikes. And then I can say 'Belay that order' and sound important again. This is the life."

Question for you, Rat Boy:

If "belay" essentially means never mind (eg, "stop, quit —used in the imperative <belay there>," per Merriam-Webster online), would you enlighten me on the meaning of your comment? Admittedly, my "belay that order" caption was silly rather than funny, and I'd be the first to agree it was fair game for a dig. All the same, I've never heard of people misusing that particular phrase, so I'm not clear what you were getting at.

No big deal, just want to learn something.

 

[Isis]

Maybe you'll also want to put me behind a force field after this one, but...

Kirk (to self): "Well, I guess I deserved to be put behind this force field. Next time, I'll have to be sure I don't do my 'belay that order' shtick with the self-destruct command. I never realized they'd 'belay' that particular order with only 5 seconds to spare..."

 

[Isis]

Kirk (OS): "Bones, I order you to get over yourself. All the awesomeness around here belongs to me, mister."

 

[UFO]

I can't stand this Bones! Its so 21st century. Where's the contrast? The atmosphere. The depth!
What we need are black consoles with red trim. Grey paneling perhaps, ... a little orange.
Why didn't we get cutting edge blinking lights displays? I love those!

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

McCoy: "Word of advice kid: never go to an ice planet. You may ask yourself: 'hey, what's wrong with ice planets?' I'll tell you what, one second you think you're just peachy - everything's all ice cream and cake, and then BAM! Anus crab tryin' to eat you."

Uhura: "Spock... put your pants back on... please."

Kirk: "I love the smell of miniskirts in the morning."

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: Okay people, we're ready for a fantastic mission everyone. I love the smiles and enthusiasm I see on this bridge.

Uhura: Captain, Starfleet just canceled our mission to Risa and is assigning us to search the debris near Vulcan for Starfleet corpses.

Kirk: Spock, you sure you don't wanna be Captain anymore?

 

[Jonas Grumby]

McCoy: "Risa? To hell with Risa, kid! You ever heard of a little place called Wrigley's Pleasure Planet?"

 

[LeadHead]

McCoy: Disease and Danger wrapped in Darkness and Silence!

Waiter: Okay, and did you want soup or salad with that?

 

[Isis]

Spock: "You're both out. I didn't say 'Simon Says'."

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Bones: "Jim, you like movies about gladiators?"

 

[LeadHead]

Bones: "Jim, you like movies about gladiators?"

Kirk: No, but I spent some time in a Turkish Prison where I saw a grown man naked.

 

[Nerys Myk]

McCoy: "Risa? To hell with Risa, kid! You ever heard of a little place called Wrigley's Pleasure Planet?"

McCoy: "They got STDs there that even you haven't heard of!!!!"

Kirk: ( to camera): He don't know me very well, do he?"

 

[M'Sharak]

^

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: I think these things are-

Shuttle crashes into Enterprise

Kirk: -pretty safe.

Sarek: And that's a TKO in the 8th round!

Spock: Why aren't you smiling Uhura?

Uhura: I bet on Kirk.

Kirk: I hope I get a green wraparound for the next film.

 

[Vassa]

WHAT!?!? Oh, like you two didn't want to do the same thing within ten minutes of meeting him!

I am Kirk's one thousand reflections.

 

[Sanae]

McCoy (thinking): I didn't think it'd be this easy to roofie him...

Uhura: Somehow I'm beginning to understand K/S shippers.
Sarek: Me too.
Spock: ...

Kirk (singing): I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for...
Audience: TAKE IT OFF THEN!!