Do you want any of those Indian Ocean islands? Or maybe you can get somewhere closer to WHF and invade Vancouver Island.
We need some wars as entertainment.
We need some wars as entertainment.
Ruler of the World thread
- Thread starter Miss Chicken
- Start date
Sweet. "The Commonwealth." I like it. And we do have Androids that are indistinguishable from real people.Well, at least now we know where the Institute in Fallout 3 came from.Oil? Feh. In Super New England, we're using zero point energy.
Awesome. You got a deal, especially if those hemp products include cheap paper that we can use to bring down the price of books and magazines.
How nice... a whole thread dedicated to me! 
These mutterings of war are deeply troubling, considering not all of the world's territory is yet claimed. I fear this may devolve into a chaotic land-grab if we do not tread carefully.
My alliances with Thor Damar, Supreme and awe-inspiring Taoiseach of the Rus-Celtic Union (RUC),
and Mr. Laser Beam, Lord Ruler of New York City, remain strong, and as of yet I have no enemies, remaining eager to accept overtures of peace and co-operation from anyone else. I cannot allow the peace to be broken by warmongerers and agitators. I will therefore work to keep my part of the world (namely, the bottom), free from aggression.
To this end, elite penguin paratroopers have been dispatched to the Falkland Islands, having landed just moments ago.
They are here not to establish a colony, but to set up a listening post, monitoring any ships or planes approaching Antarctica. The post will be removed as soon as someone else claims the Falkland Islands, and subject to confirmation by Miss Chicken. Control will be handed over to a sovereign peacekeeping force as soon as one is established here. Anyone seeking to claim the area, and remove this burden from my nation, will be warmly received.
Meanwhile, I draw attention to my new Iceberg-class blockade warship, below. These vessels are positioned around my holdings, for defensive purposes. Allied and neutral vessels may continue to move in and out of my realm for peaceful trade purposes, but any hostile ships or planes will be destroyed.
Commander of my Forces Stackton G. Yellowfeather (below), reminds the nations of the world that peace is preferable to war- but he also reminds you that the Nasat Realm of Ross is not a state that will easily tolerate aggression.
Let us rededicate ourselves to the goals of peaceful trade and co-operation. Who is with me?
My alliances with Thor Damar, Supreme and awe-inspiring Taoiseach of the Rus-Celtic Union (RUC),
and Mr. Laser Beam, Lord Ruler of New York City, remain strong, and as of yet I have no enemies, remaining eager to accept overtures of peace and co-operation from anyone else. I cannot allow the peace to be broken by warmongerers and agitators. I will therefore work to keep my part of the world (namely, the bottom), free from aggression.
To this end, elite penguin paratroopers have been dispatched to the Falkland Islands, having landed just moments ago.
They are here not to establish a colony, but to set up a listening post, monitoring any ships or planes approaching Antarctica. The post will be removed as soon as someone else claims the Falkland Islands, and subject to confirmation by Miss Chicken. Control will be handed over to a sovereign peacekeeping force as soon as one is established here. Anyone seeking to claim the area, and remove this burden from my nation, will be warmly received.
Meanwhile, I draw attention to my new Iceberg-class blockade warship, below. These vessels are positioned around my holdings, for defensive purposes. Allied and neutral vessels may continue to move in and out of my realm for peaceful trade purposes, but any hostile ships or planes will be destroyed.
Commander of my Forces Stackton G. Yellowfeather (below), reminds the nations of the world that peace is preferable to war- but he also reminds you that the Nasat Realm of Ross is not a state that will easily tolerate aggression.
Let us rededicate ourselves to the goals of peaceful trade and co-operation. Who is with me?
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the Falklands are a dominion of Britain, therefore are subject to claims by either the Celtic Union or England.
or anyone who bothers to claim Argentina...
where'd RegFan get? i could do with some target practice...
or anyone who bothers to claim Argentina...
where'd RegFan get? i could do with some target practice...
If either Thor Damar or AstroSmurf desire to re-annex the islands, the Nasat will gladly and peacefully turn jurasdiction of the islands over to them - or, of course, to whoever Miss Chicken places there. The word of Miss Chicken will naturally be obeyed.
We make no sovereign claim to the islands, we merely await the arrival of a power or nation willing to take on the burden of administrating them peacefully.
Anyone who thinks penguins cannot fly has obviously never thrown one out of an airplane.
I'm with you.
So long as you accept that the native people of Europe are superior to the peoples of every other continent in every way imaginable.
^^ We will bury you.
Super New England offers its futuristic technology to help explore Lake Vostok and all those other sub-glacial lakes, as long as we get to keep samples of any freaky biological specimens we find and are free to study any fossils, ruins of lost civilizations or crashed flying saucers that we come across.
You can
have Madagascar as long as you create an army of lemurs.
You may have the Falklands for the time being but only if you are willing to fit to keep them - I think it is time for the 2nd Falklands War.
As a staunch ally of the penguins I take exception to this outrageous attempt at violent slander.
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The Glory that is the RUC deplores this recent talk of war and will have no part in any saber-rattling. We shall stand by our allies and offer our strong hand and will to all in need.
But do not take us lightly, for the Black Watch rises and the Legions of Boru lay in wait!
Furthermore, since there has been no confirmation from the Dominion of England on the matter, I am claiming De facto control of the North Sea oil fields subject to negotiations.
Also, I deem that Archon Deranged Nasat's actions regarding the Falklands are acceptable for the foreseeable future and I ask that the RUC can dispatch a Naval flotilla to the area for the propose of conducting join operations with your forces.
In the name of truth, justice and a hard boiled egg!
Thor Damar (STRUC)
But do not take us lightly, for the Black Watch rises and the Legions of Boru lay in wait!
Furthermore, since there has been no confirmation from the Dominion of England on the matter, I am claiming De facto control of the North Sea oil fields subject to negotiations.
Also, I deem that Archon Deranged Nasat's actions regarding the Falklands are acceptable for the foreseeable future and I ask that the RUC can dispatch a Naval flotilla to the area for the propose of conducting join operations with your forces.
In the name of truth, justice and a hard boiled egg!
Thor Damar (STRUC)
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Glorious Taoiseach of the RUC, (gods, that sounds wrong)
I bring greetings from the people of the Western Mediterranean Union. We wish to note the historic ties between our two nations; both the founder of the Nudity movement and the current Imperator hail from Ireland, so we wish prosperity for the people of that land.
Our greatest cartographers have spent almost an entire minute examining the North Sea situation and have concluded that the entire North Sea oil fields fall under the jurisdiction of Scotland, even those over by Norway. Additionally, I have been informed by my Council of State that the Irish require large quantities of "The Black Stuff" for society to hold together. I assume this is in reference to the oil.
Due to our cultural ties, we offer to you our guarantee to protect you should the Dominion of England wish to press the matter and steal your oil. We are also sending our best engineers to help you build a pipeline directly from the North Sea to Ireland.
Yours drunkenly,
Imperator The Godfrey Steven Benn.
Last night, the Confederation received an urgent request from the former French province of Alsace. It appears that with the loss of France's central government, those regions left behind have fallen into anarchy. Fortunately the southern regions were stabilized thanks to the Godfrey Steven Benn, but the central and northeastern provinces haven't been so lucky.
Because of Alsace's ancient ties with the CEC's primarily Germanic population, they have petitioned for membership in the Confederation, and we've gladly accepted, pending Miss Chicken's approval. As the Alsatian population was only slightly over 1 million before their society collapsed, it's likely the chaos has thinned its numbers somewhat, ensuring that the population of the CEC does not grow too much.
Speaking of which...current map of the world:
I'm surprised Rii hasn't come along to claim the rest of France.
Because of Alsace's ancient ties with the CEC's primarily Germanic population, they have petitioned for membership in the Confederation, and we've gladly accepted, pending Miss Chicken's approval. As the Alsatian population was only slightly over 1 million before their society collapsed, it's likely the chaos has thinned its numbers somewhat, ensuring that the population of the CEC does not grow too much.
The Confederation thanks Kazakhstan for the generous gift. The caviar will be well received at our numerous corporate office parties. In exchange, we would like to offer Kazakhstan one hundred bottles of our finest Franconian wine, straight from our Bavarian heartland. We also wish His Majesty well on his conquest of Uzbekistan, and look forward to the day when all of Central Asia finds itself living under the flag of Kazakhstan.
The Confederation welcomes both of your proposals, though we worry that the less civilized cultures living beyond European soil will find the name of our organization too difficult for their primitive tongues to pronounce.
The CEC welcomes friendship with the REA, and appreciates its offer of assistance. In exchange for the temporary leasing of part of its merchant force, the Confederation offers the Republic 12% of all profits derived from the sale of goods transported by Eastern American ships.
Fear not, my friend. I hadn't forgotten you. That's an outdated map that you quoted.You are missing the Republic of Eastern America, which encompasses the entirity of the states of Georgia, North Carolina, Florida, South Carolina, Virginia, Alabama, and Mississippi in North America.If I've missed any claims, I apologize. Just point out the mistake and I shall rectify it as soon as I'm able.
Speaking of which...current map of the world:
I'm surprised Rii hasn't come along to claim the rest of France.
since my current holdings are only at 17.2million in population, and no one else is claming territory on my borders, i'd like to expand my holdings to:
Kansas
Nebraska
Colorado
Idaho
Utah
this would give me a combined population in the region of 45million.
Kansas
Nebraska
Colorado
Idaho
Utah
this would give me a combined population in the region of 45million.
I'm with you.
To His Smugness, the Imperator, the Godfrey Steven Benn,
Your support is much appreciated, and I will immediately reclassify your great and visionary nation as a friend and ally. Sadly, I cannot permit my own human citizens to enjoy the benefits of nudism, due to the below-freezing temperatures my realm often "enjoys". However, we acknowledge your forward-thinking approach to the issue, and are thankful that under your rule the beaches of Southern Europe are finally being put to the use God intended them for. Your embassy will be placed at my Galapagos colonies, where your people can continue to express their religion without fear of frostbite. As for the second part of your message- the acknowledgement of your continent's superiority- I submit that you need no reassurance from me, Your Smugness. For your sense of superiority requires no boost from your allies, so great and secure it already is.
Your respectful ally, His Insectile Supremeness, Archon Deranged Nasat.
Your offer is most generous. We have the highest respect for your nation and its forward-thinking approach to global issues. As our own technological base is far less advanced, we welcome your cooperation. Your terms are accepted, and your exploration/scientific teams may be dispatched at your convenience. I must cautiously add, however, that the frozen shapeshifting alien known as The Thing remains national property- as you requested, though, any traces of its ship or other technology will be turned over to you. You'll do far better with it than us, anyway.
Long live Super New England (seriously, how are those immortality serums coming along?)
As ever, Miss Chicken is wise and fair. As per her commands, the Nasat Realm of Ross will now commit itself to establishing the Falklands as a true colony. My sovereignty now extends here. Rest assured, that it has no further ambitions.
We thank our ally for its defense of our interests in the halls of international politics. It is good to know we have selected our friends wisely. I hearby open an ice-sculpted baseball stadium on the Ross Ice Shelf, to be named "The Laser Australis". Mr. Laser Beam and his officials may attend freely whenever they wish.
We'll make a team or two soon, I'll put it on the list of things to do.
With many thanks to my other strong ally on the international stage, these joint operations you speak of would be welcome. We would gratefully accept your forces stationed around the Falklands to aid in protecting this, our newest colony. The strength and wisdom of the RUC and its ruler has been of great value in the past, and will continue to be so. I must ask, though, that the boiled egg in question be from a chicken or goose, not a penguin.
We also recognise your claim to the North Sea. If you have oil of your own, though, we may need to renegotiate that part of our trade alliance.
Long live the RUC!
To the wise Archon of the North and lord of Ice,
I am proud to inform you that my fleet, led by the newly constructed aircraft carrier Glasgow kiss is on its way to the falklands isles and your esteemed Empire. please infom commander Stackton G. Yellowfeather that my Admiral Vladimir James O'Brien will be aviable to liaise with him at the first opportunity.
With the proud sound of bagpipes in the background,
Thor Damar.
Imperator The Godfrey Steven Benn (by the saints that is...not unexpected)
I salute you and the proud WMU that is a shining light unto the world. Your gifts of both moral support and engineers is greatly appreciated and I will make sure that they return with the finest whiskey as a token of my great esteem.
I feel that it is time for our two great Unions to enter into a more formal alliance which will hopefully result in excellent trading opportunities and the creation of a more peaceful globe.
I hope that you will agree with me and I look forward to cementing our friendship.
I raise a pint of the other black stuff in your honour good sir,
Supreme Taoisearch Thor Damar
I am proud to inform you that my fleet, led by the newly constructed aircraft carrier Glasgow kiss is on its way to the falklands isles and your esteemed Empire. please infom commander Stackton G. Yellowfeather that my Admiral Vladimir James O'Brien will be aviable to liaise with him at the first opportunity.
With the proud sound of bagpipes in the background,
Thor Damar.
Imperator The Godfrey Steven Benn (by the saints that is...not unexpected)
I salute you and the proud WMU that is a shining light unto the world. Your gifts of both moral support and engineers is greatly appreciated and I will make sure that they return with the finest whiskey as a token of my great esteem.
I feel that it is time for our two great Unions to enter into a more formal alliance which will hopefully result in excellent trading opportunities and the creation of a more peaceful globe.
I hope that you will agree with me and I look forward to cementing our friendship.
I raise a pint of the other black stuff in your honour good sir,
Supreme Taoisearch Thor Damar
I humbly thank the CEC for the wine. My nobles and I will be sure to enjoy it. Conquest of Uzbekistan is nearing completion. The occupants were initially not very receptive, but when my army assured them that they would not be harmed and would receive a chance to be part of something greater, they gladly accepted the 'offer' to join the Kingdom.
I would like to open up a proposal to his Insectile Supremeness. With my total control of the Aral Sea, having conquered Uzbekistan, I wish to do my bit for the environment and restore it to its former glory. The sea has been shrinking dramatically, partly due to Soviet interference in the darkest years of our country. I have sent a detachment of peasants to redirect rivers to the Aral Sea double time. As the center of my realm, and the location of my most famous landmark, Miss Chicken's statue, it is a top priority.
However, even with these rivers, we need water to start up the process of the water cycle. This is where his Insectile Supremeness comes in.
As the Nasat realm of Ross contains huge amounts of ice, I would like to propose shipments of vast quantities of ice/water to Kazakhstan, where it will be poured into the sea.
I will arrange transport costs, and am working on construction of a naval craft to be transported over the rebel states to the south and into the Indian Ocean to transport this ice back, where it will be driven by huge tankers to the Aral Sea. The journey is dangerous, with Turkmen, Afghan and Pakistani bandits just waiting to hijack that much water, but that need not concern you.
As I could potentially be demanding vast quantities of your property, I feel it is only right to give something in return.
As Kazakhstan's chief export, I believe caviar will be greatly appreciated by your subjects, and I will open up the negotiations to a thousand barrels. Also, I'm sure I could 'persuade' some peasants to join your workforce, if that will add to the offer. A military alliance could also be drawn up, should the Nasat realm ever need Kazakhstan's help in the future.
I await your reply with trepidation,
His Benevolent Majesty Eyes of Kazakhstan.
