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Books that will never be written by the DS9 crew & others

Photon

Commodore
Commodore
Nog's book: Dunking: Doing it With Style

Ezri's first release: Taking You Seriously, a Complete Primer
 
Dukat: My Greatest Mistakes - book 1: Why the Occupation of Bajor Was Wrong

Weyoun: The Founder Delusion and The Founders Are Not Great: How Belief in the Founders Poisons Everything

Omet'iklan: a two-part autobiography with an anti-war message: book 1: Cloned on the 39877.4 about the horrors of war; book 2: Life Is Victory - about living in peace after being readjusted and finding happiness taking care of the infants in his own hatchery
 
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Honesty Really Is The Best Policy! - Elim Garak
Rules of Altruism - Quark
Time Travel for Fun and Profit - Dulmer and Lucsly
 
Honesty Really Is The Best Policy! - Elim Garak
Rules of Altruism - Quark
Time Travel for Fun and Profit - Dulmer and Lucsly

I came in here to pen a few more, but I have to comment. These are effing hilarious.

Living With It, And Partying Every Night (Benjamin Sisko)
How Religion Is Destroying Us All (Kira Nerys)
Meridian: My Greatest Mistakes (Jadzia Dax)
Post-Ganglionic And Other Stupid Stories (Julian Bashir)
Curing Life With A Simple Smile (Worf)
Joyful Polygamy: A Tale Of Many Wives (Miles O'Brien)
Exploring The Root Of All Evil (Quark)
The Importance of Personal Liberties (Weyoun)
Oops! I Did It Again: My Life As A Resounding Failure (Dukat)
The Summer Of Love (Female Changeling)
 
Honesty Really Is The Best Policy! - Elim Garak
Rules of Altruism - Quark
Time Travel for Fun and Profit - Dulmer and Lucsly

I came in here to pen a few more, but I have to comment. These are effing hilarious.

Living With It, And Partying Every Night (Benjamin Sisko)
How Religion Is Destroying Us All (Kira Nerys)
Meridian: My Greatest Mistakes (Jadzia Dax)
Post-Ganglionic And Other Stupid Stories (Julian Bashir)
Curing Life With A Simple Smile (Worf)
Joyful Polygamy: A Tale Of Many Wives (Miles O'Brien)
Exploring The Root Of All Evil (Quark)
The Importance of Personal Liberties (Weyoun)
Oops! I Did It Again: My Life As A Resounding Failure (Dukat)
The Summer Of Love (Female Changeling)
Nice
 
Creole Food and Command Decisions by Benjamin Sisko

I need to Start Dating Simple Men
by Kira Nerys

Shapshifting Across The Universe
by Odo

Klingon Opera for Dummies
by Worf

Just Because I Have A Bug in my Body Doesn't Mean you Should use Bug Spray on Me
by Jadzia Dax

Curing the Common Cold with Genetic Engineering
by Julian Bashir

Being Right in The Center of Everything
by Jake Sisko

At Least I'm More Popular Than Neelix
by Quark

The Last Leg of The Journey
by Nog

The Founders Suck by
Weyoun #6

The Founders Rule by
Weyoun #7

Neck Breaks Hurt by
Weyoun #8

Names, Names, Names
by The Female Changeling
 
He's Just Not That Into You, by Ezri Dax

How To Raise Emotionally Stable Klingon Children by Worf

Sordid Tales Of An Out Of Control Sex God, by Rom

How We All Can Save The Economy by Former Nagus Zek

Multiple Personalities; The 7 Step Diagnosis and Cure, Also by Ezri Dax
 
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