Aussies fail at sex.

[Rii]

I love the smell of British tabloids in the morning. Smells like ... civilization.

The Sun (link is NSFW)

LOVERS Down Under appear to be clueless in bed after it was revealed the most popular search on Australian Google is "how to have sex".

[....]

And it appears Aussies also need help when it comes to puckering up - with "how to kiss" the second most searched topic.

Girls also asked Google how to get someone to like them.

And men wanted to know how to ask a woman out.

[....]

Experts said it shows that shy teens and twenty-somethings are now turning to the internet rather than their friends for intimate love lessons.

Ah, the internet: making up for the public education system's failure to offer comprehensive sex education.

 

[DeafPoet]

I don't want to generalize, but I've spent some time behind closed doors with an Aussie lady and I can safely say she wasn't contributing to that data.

"Studies" like this are always dumb. People want to know how to get other people to like them romantically?!? Yeah, that's a problem limited only to Australia.

 

[scotpens]

This isn't really all that surprising, if Australian men are like the guy in Don's Party whose idea of a pickup line is, “Hello, gorgeous! Care for a screw?”

 

[Angela 0077]

Geez clueless in the old bedroom.
Well they are mistaken on that little bit of internet data smiles

 

[Angela 0077]

This isn't really all that surprising, if Australian men are like the guy in Don's Party whose idea of a pickup line is, “Hello, gorgeous! Care for a screw?”

Times have changed since that movie was made.

 

[Rii]

"Studies" like this are always dumb. People want to know how to get other people to like them romantically?!? Yeah, that's a problem limited only to Australia.

Thanks, Professor.

 

[DeafPoet]

"Studies" like this are always dumb. People want to know how to get other people to like them romantically?!? Yeah, that's a problem limited only to Australia.

Thanks, Professor.

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

 

[Nardpuncher]

"Studies" like this are always dumb. People want to know how to get other people to like them romantically?!? Yeah, that's a problem limited only to Australia.

Thanks, Professor.

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

Yep, that was a weird response.

Maybe they didn't complete the sentence. Maybe Australians are searching "How to have sex with sheep."

 

[Somerled]

Yep. It's a dumb piece in paper that specialises in titilating it's readers with pictures of naughty bits (the bigger the better) and making up stories for the more voyuristic (and sex starved) readers.

Nuff said on this one .

 

[Somerled]

Thanks, Professor.

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

Yep, that was a weird response.

Maybe they didn't complete the sentence. Maybe Australians are searching "How to have sex with sheep."

That would be Kiwi's .... barrrrr!!??!!***.

 

[Rii]

"Studies" like this are always dumb. People want to know how to get other people to like them romantically?!? Yeah, that's a problem limited only to Australia.

Thanks, Professor.

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

Of course it's silly; it's a bit of fun is all. And it becomes rather less fun when one laboriously enumerates the various ways in which it would fail to pass peer review.

I'm sure Australians everywhere appreciate your concern, though.

 

[scotpens]

. . . Maybe they didn't complete the sentence. Maybe Australians are searching ”How to have sex with sheep.”

That's easy -- just ask a Scotsman.

 

[Nardpuncher]

I'll be on Scotland tomorrow...I'll ask. But I'll use your name.Um, username. Anyway...you know why Scotsmen wear kilts? Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

 

[captcalhoun]

it's the welsh that are sheep shaggers.

 

[Amaris]

Looks like I need to head to Australia. *straightens tie*

 

[Pingfah]

Thanks, Professor.

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

Of course it's silly; it's a bit of fun is all. And it becomes rather less fun when one laboriously enumerates the various ways in which it would fail to pass peer review.

I'm sure Australians everywhere appreciate your concern, though.

Could you possibly be any more dour?

 

[O'Dib]

I learned how to have sex using the internets as well. It's called porn.

 

[JonathonWally]

I learned how to have sex using the internets as well. It's called porn.

Same, when I was 15 I knew what "reverse wheelbarrow" was before I heard the term "missionary position"

Ah, internet.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Looks like I need to head to Australia. *straightens tie*

Is it really that smart to run off to have sex with people who know even less about it than you do?

And I'm sure the search query is less about the mechanics and more about doing it well. If we have people reaching adulthood who don't at least know the basic concept that the penis goes into the vagina, I weep for humanity.

I also want to see porn of it. Just for the lulz.

 

[Deckerd]

Aren't you Australian? I was coming to the defense of Australians by pointing out how dumb this is. Which is what I thought you were doing by posting this in the first place.

Of course it's silly; it's a bit of fun is all. And it becomes rather less fun when one laboriously enumerates the various ways in which it would fail to pass peer review.

I'm sure Australians everywhere appreciate your concern, though.

Could you possibly be any more dour?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was thinking that. Thank you for articulating it, though.