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Facts About Captain Robau

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Captain Robau can win a game of chess in a single move. One so deadly it has been known to destroy entire villages with it's cunning.

Anyone else attempting to duplicate this chess move has died horribly.
 
Some say that beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. I say that it is proof that God did something to seriously piss off the Robau and had to create something awesome real quick in order to appease Robau and avert the Robau Rage.
 
Robau does more before 6 a.m. than all the 6 a.m.'s in human history have ever accomplished TOGETHER.
 
Robau has in his possession four hecks, eleven damns, six craps, eighteen flying fraks, five darns, twelve hoots and one hairy rat's ass.

When he asks, people give.
 
Captain Robau blew up Krypton with a particularly harsh glare.

Captain Robau once had an orgy with Supergirl, Batgirl, G-girl, Wonder Woman and Catwoman. It lasted six months and nine days.
 
When Robau goes fishing he doesn't even leave the house. The fish will flop up to his front door, go inside, flop into the frying pan and cook themselves for the honor of being eaten by Captain Robau.
 
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