Tell Me Three Things About Yourself

[selina]

1. I didn't like Casablanca

I assume you mean the movie, not the town.

3. I still cry when I watch the last unicorn

Have you ever read the book? It's my favourite.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

This is the most wonderful and amazing thread! KESTRA, you rock for coming up with the idea!!

So many things i wanted to comment on...but i've picked only a few:

<snip>
3. We are hoping to adopt this year (or at least be well underway with the process)

Good luck!! Sending positive vibes!!

I thought my first three were pretty serious and said a lot about me, but here are three more in that vein:

1. I'm manic depressive, and I'm struggling desperately. Only people who've experienced it can know that slow and tortuous drowning is tolerable when the gasps of air are so pure that they induce clarity, peace, and utter capability in any endeavor. They know that one tolerates the demons for the times when he sees angels.
2. I think I am at a crux in my life and I have to act, and act soon, else I'll lose myself in more ways than one.
3. Sometimes I stay alive for the sake of my mother. Sometimes, it's "[t]he way a crow shook down on me the dust of snow from a hemlock tree [that] has given my heart a change of mood and saved a day that I had rued." Or it's the music. Or the curiosity. These are the drugs I need, like my daily insulin injections, to stay alive.

Thank you for sharing. That could not have been easy. My mom is bi-polar and she lives in that 'high' most of the time. When she has the depression it is beyond bad.

{{{I'm sending you warm hugs!! }}}

1. I was born blind with cataracts and I couldn't see until I was four. It's why I can't drive.

2. When I was 12 my mom worked cleaning sailor's houses in Norfolk Virginia. I went with her one day and I went in the bedroom and the entire ceiling was covered in Playboy centerfolds. It was like a proto-Internet (this was '73). Good times. My mom yelled at me for jumping on the bed.

3. I've got a loverly bunch of coconuts.

#1. OMG!!!! #2 OMG!!!!! #3 LOL!!!!

What do you remember about being dead?

<snip>

I've never spoken to someone who has come back from death.

<snip>

Have you spoken with anyone else who has? Is your experience unusual to your knowledge?

My dad (who is gone now) who was not a religious person (but did believe in god) died and came back. He went into cardiac arrest and had to be 'shocked' back to life. He told us that he felt himself floating and felt the ceiling on his back. He looked down and saw his body with my mother and sister by his side. He heard my sister cry, "Don't go daddy!" That's all he remembered. Hearing him say this was really something....

Me next!

<snip>
3. People are shocked when they find out I love Star Trek as much as I do.

Same here!

Three more fact about me, a little less fluffy:

1) I have a type of bipolar disorder that manifests as chronic depression until you attempt to medicate it, at which point it shifts into irritable mania (hallucinations, hoarding, panic attacks, migraines, cardiac troubles, compulsions toward self-harm, insomnia, etc) that can only be escaped with...more medication. In short, the only thing worse than the lows are the harrowing and extremely destructive "highs". I was in an unbroken state of irritable mania from the ages of 18 to 23, when I finally found a med combination that pulled me out of it. The psychiatrist who literally saved me called this bipolar-3, and the ailment is supposed to be published in the next DSM.

Confession time: I am very jealous of bipolar people who have more classic symptoms and experience pleasurable mania. I've never been so lucky. I have lapsed back into a major depression in the past year due to some very bad things that happened to me, but am afraid to seek medical help for it, in fear of waking this hibernating monster once more.

2) I am as directionless in life now as I have ever been. I would love to return to school, but have no idea what to study or what to be when I grow up (I'm 27). I hold a bachelor's degree, yet feel woefully undereducated and certainly unfulfilled in my working life. A lot of my friends are experiencing personal and career success now, yet I still feel stubbornly stuck in neutral.

3) I certainly hope I come across as more interesting and less of a butt-hurt whiner IRL than I do here

Thank you for sharing. Sending you {{{HUGS}}}

I guess people are throwing out more, so here's some more from me:

1) On the subject of death, I almost died when I was 6 during a tonsillectomy. They accidentally nicked an artery in my neck and didn't realize; the nurse on duty when I was in recovery wouldn't believe that anything was wrong and my dad had to scream at her to get her to bring a doctor in to look at me, who subsequently rushed me back into surgery. I then almost fell into a coma due to significant internal bleeding and a lack of available blood for a transfusion at the time (apparently they had just discovered their supply had been contaminated or something). I don't remember any of this beyond the stories my parents have told me.

<snip>.

OMG!!!!!!

Something i've noticed in many posts. So many of us feel that our posts go unnoticed. It happens to all of us. We have to remind ourselves that not every post can be commented on. I know i've felt this way many times. Its funny how so many of us feel this way. I guess it means we have a lot more in common that we may think.

Thanks everyone for opening your hearts. I am so grateful to KESTRA for putting up this thread!

 

[Yeoman Randi]

<snip>
I actually had a good talk with my mom yesterday about how I feel. Well, more like me trying to keep up the facade and failing horribly by starting to cry, but then the talk came about. We're going to see if we can get some stuff going, that maybe I can make some small commercial bits for the web for my current working place. They need PR, and I can do it for them. And hopefully we can go a bit from there and make people see what I've done by myself and that I could be a valuable co-worker.

Also mom thinks that I should have an appointment with a doctor about anti-depressive medication. My first impulse was that that's giving up, but then the logic kicks in and pokes with the fact that I've pretty close to that point anyways. We'll see what happens there.

A good thing with meds would probably be a boost in self esteem. Which is shit, and has been like that for a long time. I've made steps to improve it by seeing to that I exercise a bit every day, which is helping me lose weight, which I hope will help me with my self esteem.

I can't even begin to tell you how glad i am that you've talked with your mom. There is so much i would like to say right now....but if i started i'd go on and on and eventually fall apart. Keep talking....whether it be with your mom or a professional. Isolating oneself is very common for those suffering from depression. Talking is not easy but it can make a difference.

I'm sending you HUGE HUGS!

 

[Omnius]

3. We are hoping to adopt this year (or at least be well underway with the process)

That's awesome news mommyhill!

Adding three more:
4. Just like Scrat I hoard stuff, though I've got that under control now.
5. I love liquorice, especially the salty ones.
6. According to my mates I'm pretty good at imitating a pirate.

 

[KimMH]

If any one of you here ever sees me being mean to another poster - please remind me of this thread. It's amazing the things you are surviving and I hope overcoming and thriving. I have to rememeber to be kinder in RL too; you never know what the people you see face to face are dragging around too.

 

[pigletsgiblets]

I'm an atheist

I love cats

I don't have kids

 

[LitmusDragon]

Any particular form of art that you enjoy? I enjoy drawing and a few other things myself, though I don't pretend to be good at it either!

I guess I like writing the best, though I enjoy dabbling in various things! I can play guitar, bass, and drums fairly well. I enjoy making collage type art in photoshop and someday I'd like to try my hand at real collages with actual cut up bits of paper. I love animation and with flash available now anyone can do it, it's on my to-do list. I have a half-baked idea to make a single story that utilizes all of these elements and put it up on the web. Like, one chapter would be written, then the next would be a series of pictures, then the next would be an animation, then back to written again. First I have to get my website up though.

I've recently finished a novel I was working on for a few years and it's given me a lot of confidence to follow up on my other interests.

 

[Nerys Ghemor]

3) I've been out of school for 6+ years now and I still have dreams that I forgot to go to all the lectures in a class and I have the final tomorrow.

Ugh, I just had that one again last night!

And apparently I have totally and completely weirded people out with everything I said in this thread. Which is amazing, considering the other rather colorful stuff people have said!

 

[KimMH]

I like to think you are kinder than most!

 

[Gryffindorian]

1. I think some people in this thread need to drink less coffee/ease up on the caffeine. OMG! OMG! OMG!

2. I have no known medicinal allergies.

3. I dislike all forms of social events (family reunions, company picnics, banquets, weddings, outdoor games, birthday parties, etc.). I don't have a social anxiety disorder, but I'm quite introverted and would rather not deal with big crowds and gatherings, not that I avoid them totally.

 

[AstroSmurf]

Well I think I will give it another go:

1) I am allergic to caffeine. If I have a little bit, I sweat profusely, get dizzy spells, my heart palpitates and my skin itches. If I have a lot, I break out in hives and I can't breathe. (I have the same symptoms if I get stung by a bee!) I usually don't consume chocolate or coffee but every once in a while I will throw caution to the wind and have some because I love both so much. One piece of chocolate or a cup of decaf is fine but any more than that I am in trouble.

2) In the last two years I have lost my ability to feel much of anything for my own life. Things have taken several harsh turns recently. It has been very hard mentally, physically and financially. Now when bad things happen, I am neither shocked or surprised. Most of the time, I don't even care and couldn't be bothered to fix it or make an effort to resolve issues. I just float from one thing to the next. It scares me how "uninvolved" I am in my own life and I don't know how to fix it.

3) I am a social chameleon. You can throw me into any group of people and I will adapt very quickly to the group and the situation. I don't lose my own personality but I can almost always find a way to relate and communicate with almost any social subset. (I tend to be a little quiet at first since I am observing. But once I figure things out, I will talk your ear off.)

 

[Emher]

^For 1, you get a "Aw shit that sucks man!" For 2 you have my sympathies. For 3 you have my never ending envy Seriously I am terrible in almost all social situations. At least I feel so myself.

<snip>
I actually had a good talk with my mom yesterday about how I feel. Well, more like me trying to keep up the facade and failing horribly by starting to cry, but then the talk came about. We're going to see if we can get some stuff going, that maybe I can make some small commercial bits for the web for my current working place. They need PR, and I can do it for them. And hopefully we can go a bit from there and make people see what I've done by myself and that I could be a valuable co-worker.

Also mom thinks that I should have an appointment with a doctor about anti-depressive medication. My first impulse was that that's giving up, but then the logic kicks in and pokes with the fact that I've pretty close to that point anyways. We'll see what happens there.

A good thing with meds would probably be a boost in self esteem. Which is shit, and has been like that for a long time. I've made steps to improve it by seeing to that I exercise a bit every day, which is helping me lose weight, which I hope will help me with my self esteem.

I can't even begin to tell you how glad i am that you've talked with your mom. There is so much i would like to say right now....but if i started i'd go on and on and eventually fall apart. Keep talking....whether it be with your mom or a professional. Isolating oneself is very common for those suffering from depression. Talking is not easy but it can make a difference.

I'm sending you HUGE HUGS!

Things are better now then a when I wrote my very depressed post there a bit back. It's helped that I've gotten loads to do. What with the enormous amounts of snow we've been getting both I and my dad will have a lot to do, especially since we have to get a lot of it cleared before Friday night when it's supposed to rain. Loads of frozen snow on roofs = bad. Plus I've gotten quite a bit to do with my regular job this week.

I'm not up to 100%, but I won't be that until summer anyways. I really don't like winter.

hmmm... I'm glad you found that
I really don't expect it for myself.

Both my parents died when I was 16. I've had a couple of years to adjust and it's been a bumpy ride. Many will say I have not adjusted at all.

I'm a very happy person now, but I'm also very fatalistic. I don't believe in happy endings.

When my parents knew the end was coming they made sure I would be taken care of. I will never have to go to school or work for the rest of my life.

I live on a boat by myself and cruise the ICW, occassionally making the trek to the Bahamas. I fully expect that one day I will not make it back.

Until then, i just enjoy life as much as I can.

Do you need a buddy to sail away with you? I've got a lot in my life I'd love to escape from, and two cute chicks on a boat are always better than one.

He, he, my idea exactly.

Don't need a guy to cook for you? No? Just thought I'd throw it out there. As I said, I'm quite tired of this winter thing.

 

[Kestra]

^^^ Those dreams are the worst. I still have them, but it's always a math class that I've forgotten about. Ugh, horrid, horrid feeling.

I think every college graduate has those. I wonder why? I mean why do we so often and so specifically have that dream as our "oh my god I failed" dream. I don't dream about getting fired, but I always dream I am not going to graduate.

Well, I never actually graduated (something that people in RL don't know) so I suppose that has something to do with it. At least in my case. I'm terrified of failing again.

 

[John Picard]

3) I've been out of school for 6+ years now and I still have dreams that I forgot to go to all the lectures in a class and I have the final tomorrow.

Ugh, I just had that one again last night!

And apparently I have totally and completely weirded people out with everything I said in this thread. Which is amazing, considering the other rather colorful stuff people have said!

Even up to age 38, I'd still have dreams of being back in high school -- or perhaps, they were nightmares

 

[Gryffindorian]

Well I think I will give it another go:

1) I am allergic to caffeine. If I have a little bit, I sweat profusely, get dizzy spells, my heart palpitates and my skin itches. If I have a lot, I break out in hives and I can't breathe. (I have the same symptoms if I get stung by a bee!) I usually don't consume chocolate or coffee but every once in a while I will throw caution to the wind and have some because I love both so much. One piece of chocolate or a cup of decaf is fine but any more than that I am in trouble.

2) In the last two years I have lost my ability to feel much of anything for my own life. Things have taken several harsh turns recently. It has been very hard mentally, physically and financially. Now when bad things happen, I am neither shocked or surprised. Most of the time, I don't even care and couldn't be bothered to fix it or make an effort to resolve issues. I just float from one thing to the next. It scares me how "uninvolved" I am in my own life and I don't know how to fix it.

3) I am a social chameleon. You can throw me into any group of people and I will adapt very quickly to the group and the situation. I don't lose my own personality but I can almost always find a way to relate and communicate with almost any social subset. (I tend to be a little quiet at first since I am observing. But once I figure things out, I will talk your ear off.)

Wow. You're the first one I've heard of who has caffeine allergy. As I previously mentioned, I have a sleep disorder that necessitates me to get my daily dose of Starbucks or Peet's. I need it to get through the workday. The good thing is, you can take it in limited amounts and not completely eliminate it from your diet.

I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. I've had some financial setbacks in the past couple of years and am in the process of my own economic recovery. Have you sought any counseling? Sometimes it helps to just talk to someone. Hope you feel better.

 

[Yeoman Randi]

1. I think some people in this thread need to drink less coffee/ease up on the caffeine. OMG! OMG! OMG!

.

Hehe, what's really sad is, that is how i talk IRL. Comes from being a born and bred LI'er i think. We come out of the womb screaming "OOOOOHHHH MYYYYYY GOOOODD!!!"

 

[Gryffindorian]

Really? I hadn't noticed.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

While people are sharing dark secrets...

1. I tried to kill myself when I was 12, and spent some time in a mental hospital as a result.
2. I haven't actually cried since around the time of #1, either.
3. I wear boxer-briefs because I'm so indecisive.

 

[TheSeeker]

2. Sometimes I still feel as if I’m playing at being a grownup, rather than actually being one.

I'm 38 with a baby on the way and I still feel that way!

3) I've been out of school for 6+ years now and I still have dreams that I forgot to go to all the lectures in a class and I have the final tomorrow.

I have those kind of dreams about high school. Usually I haven't completed a course and won't graduate on time. Probably comes from my guilt at being such a slacker in high school and just scraping by.

OK, a few facts about me.

1. I am an eternal optimist.
2. I try to be the same person online as I am in real life.
3. I have almost every ticket stub from all the movies I have gone to since the early 90s.

 

[selina]

3. I dislike all forms of social events (family reunions, company picnics, banquets, weddings, outdoor games, birthday parties, etc.). I don't have a social anxiety disorder, but I'm quite introverted and would rather not deal with big crowds and gatherings, not that I avoid them totally.

Same here. I try to avoid social events. Not always, because I'm afraid of not being invited anymore and to end up lonely. But I'm not keen on going, unless I know the people and unless it's a small group. For example I enjoy an evening of board games with close friends. And the christmas party at my company last year was actually nice, because it was a friendly atmosphere and we were only 9 people.

Don't need a guy to cook for you? No? Just thought I'd throw it out there. As I said, I'm quite tired of this winter thing.

Well, since I can't cook, hell, yeah.

Glad to see that you are doing a bit better now. Cheer up, my friend.

Well, I never actually graduated (something that people in RL don't know) so I suppose that has something to do with it. At least in my case. I'm terrified of failing again.

I'm always afraid of failing. During my exam the pressure was so huge that I thought I would lose my mind. It's horrible. But it happens to me in work-related situations too, e.g. if my boss shows me a new task that I have to do, I'm always worried that I screw up. And when I'm at home I still think about it and if I have done everything right. I hate it.