No, I fucking hate Star Trek.
Dating at Work
- Thread starter MetalPants
- Start date
All the folks that date coworkers, a humble request: no fucking on the job, in the break room. The last thing a lot of us want to see when we're walking and talking with a boss is to walk into the breakroom and see the two of you getting your freak on (yes this did happen on one of my jobs)
Star Trek? Isn't that that Star Wars ripoff with Captain Spork and Mr. Birk?
Yeah, but what else can you do if one of them is married? 
I don't, but it doesn't seem to have done any harm to many of my other co-workers, most of whom are now paired up.
My opinion has always been to avoid workplace romances. However, there seem to be a LOT of people at my place of employment who feel differently. I know of several current couples at work - in fact, I'm friends with a couple. There are a few married couples. And then there are a few people who have been known to jump around and have dated multiple co-workers. And that just makes things awkward. The place where I work is like high school. Gossip spreads quickly. So you end up learning about who's slept with whom whether you really want to know or not.
As others have pointed out, dating a co-worker might be alright and work, if the company is big enough and everyone works in a different department. In a small office (or any other working place for that matter) I really wouldn't do it. I dated a co-worker once and it didn't end well. The time after that was awkward and painfull. So from my own experience I can tell you: Don't.
It's something to be careful about, but it can work. The best woman I ever dated was a co-worker. Of course, she was a social worker who was located in another building on the other side of the campus, so it's not like we worked side by side (except during one project that I was involved in). That was twenty years ago and we still keep in touch, even though she lives halfway across the country.
These days, I work from home, so there's not much chance of getting any action.
These days, I work from home, so there's not much chance of getting any action.
Usually it's a very bad idea and potentially catastrophic if one of the people involved is the boss of the other.
Personally i've been tempted many times and made a move once but she wasn't interested so i dropped the matter. Since then i stayed clear from such.. any private dealings like going to the movies with co-worker, having a beer after work etc is acceptable but you get on slippery terrain if it's just the two of you.
Best advice is to stay away from it if possible.. payoff is good (especially if it leads to a long term relationship/marriage) but the potential danger is huge even up to loss of the job and a black mark in your resume.
So.. bang anyone you want/can get but think twice about doing it in the company.
Personally i've been tempted many times and made a move once but she wasn't interested so i dropped the matter. Since then i stayed clear from such.. any private dealings like going to the movies with co-worker, having a beer after work etc is acceptable but you get on slippery terrain if it's just the two of you.
Best advice is to stay away from it if possible.. payoff is good (especially if it leads to a long term relationship/marriage) but the potential danger is huge even up to loss of the job and a black mark in your resume.
So.. bang anyone you want/can get but think twice about doing it in the company.
Myself and some of the other managers at work used to refer to our contact center as "the den of iniquity" because at one point it seemed as though our reps couldn't control themselves. There was a guy who had slept with 4 different women in the office. None of these things ever ended well.
Oh, the drama!
Oh, the drama!
I learned recently that two of my fellow programmers where I work are a married couple. Except for going to lunch together, I've never seen them spending all that much time together during work hours, though. My boss and I spend more time together.
In fact, one of my bowling teammates - my boss joined our team when one of my other teammates passed away a few months ago - told me last week that he'd thought that we were a couple. Then again, we've known each other for about seven years, I only started working there in April, and outside of work, he reports to me on two different convention committees. So our friendship is quite strong.
Actually, this is the only job I've ever had where my boss gives me a goodnight hug every day. (Apparently someone expressed a bit of surprise yesterday when he hugged me goodbye when I was leaving to go to the hospital for my weekly phlebotomy. *shrug* It's none of her business, really.)
In fact, one of my bowling teammates - my boss joined our team when one of my other teammates passed away a few months ago - told me last week that he'd thought that we were a couple. Then again, we've known each other for about seven years, I only started working there in April, and outside of work, he reports to me on two different convention committees. So our friendship is quite strong.
Actually, this is the only job I've ever had where my boss gives me a goodnight hug every day.
(Apparently someone expressed a bit of surprise yesterday when he hugged me goodbye when I was leaving to go to the hospital for my weekly phlebotomy. *shrug* It's none of her business, really.)
These days, I work from home, so there's not much chance of getting any action.
Sometimes the best action I get all week is when I work from home!
Yesterday I went to a training session with a couple of female coworkers. On the ride down there, they asked why I didn't look for dates at work.
They seemed shocked when I mentioned the old phrase (and apologies for the language), "You don't fuck where you eat."
So let me ask you BBS'ers, do you look at your coworkers as possible dates? Has it ever worked out for you? And finally, if it goes wrong, does it always go horribly wrong as it has in my experience?
Typically, no. But only if it's somebody I work closely with or would have to see at the office on a daily basis. At the center where I work, people from two different programs can date and never see each other.
Undoubtedly you have a different domestic situation than I do.These days, I work from home, so there's not much chance of getting any action.
Sometimes the best action I get all week is when I work from home!
I suppose it depends on where you work. Wait, no it doesn't it's all good. Why deny your feelings if there's something there? Could be the person you're destined to spend your life with, and you could be missing out because of some kind of personal rule.
Where I work, there are three sets of couples who work here, a fourth that both quit at the same time, and one who broke up. So, if I wanted to date someone here, it probably wouldn't be considered weird. However, the one that broke up has led to one of the strangest co-worker situations ever and can be really fucking awkward at times. It might not be typical because the girl can be a headcase and the guy tends to impulsive and inconsiderate of the consequences, but there is way too much drama (they also only dated for a week). Although the real reason I don't date anyone at work is that there isn't much to choose from (most of the girls who work there aren't single).
My answer to the question is simple. There are no absolutes. The fact that they are a co-worker should be a reason not to do it, but if you feel strongly about the person, that can overcome it. Things like how permanent you intend the job to be should also matter. Basically, you should weigh it as a factor, but that's it.
My answer to the question is simple. There are no absolutes. The fact that they are a co-worker should be a reason not to do it, but if you feel strongly about the person, that can overcome it. Things like how permanent you intend the job to be should also matter. Basically, you should weigh it as a factor, but that's it.
I've done it and it's been fine. They weren't exactly the loves of my life, but neither have the aftermaths created any major problems at work. Equally though, I've sometimes steered clear of dating other people at work when the opportunity's presented itself. So I can't say I have a hard & fast rule about this stuff. Play it by ear - if it feels right, give it a go. If you get a weird vibe about it/them, trust your guts not your balls, and steer clear.
MeanJoePhaser
Admiral
Destined.
Yeah, meet the "love of your life" at some job you happened to get. Oh, you actually believe in that stuff.
Hey a new untapped market of Teen-Romance novels: Love across the deep-fryer. Can a frycook and a drive-through window cashier overcome their differences in the name of true love.
Destined.
Oh, you actually believe in that stuff.
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