TOS Caption Contest #152: Assignment: Mirth

Kirk: "No, Roberta, Gary promised me I could use the mirror first."

 

Gary Seven: "Roberta, you're OK as a secretary, but as a member of the Intergalactic Fashion Police, I have to write you up."

 

Spock: "I prefer my pussy not shaved thank you."





Kirk: "Can this thing get the spice channel?




Nimoy: “No Madame I would not put you through the pain of doing a duet with Shattner"

 

Spock: Yes. I calculated a 99.8% probability of this photoshop being attempted...



Spock...This, however, I did not anticipate.

 

Thanks for the win Shatmandu!



Gary 7: Not now, Madeline.

 

Chick on left: Leonard...the show was cancelled five years ago. Let it go.
Leonard McCoy: <attempts to nerve pinch her, fails>

 

Spock: "Mr. Chekov, I overheard you discussing your shore leave plans with Mr. Sulu and I have good news for you! You don't have to waste your time and money looking for one on Wrigley's Pleasure Planet. I've got you one right here!"




Gary Seven: "Okay, that's done. So...where do you guys want to eat tonight?"

Kirk: "Someplace where I can hear some bossa nova."




Airhead Fan: "Mr. Nimoy, could I ask you a question about this album?"

Nimoy: "Of course! I'm always happy to discuss my music!"

AF: "Um, okay...so...are you a giant here? Or did the Enterprise get shrunk?"




Kirk (OS): "This hearing is now in session. Mr. Spock, how do you plead?"

Spock: "Captain, I swear to God, it was a cat this morning, but it was a woman last night!"

 

McCoy: "Must he keep bringing that thing to meetings all the time?"

Scotty: "Aye, and what's up with the maniacal laughing?"

 

"No Mr Bond, I expect you to die!"

Cubby Broccolli offscreen: "Very good, now can we try it without the ears?"

Nimoy: "No."

Cubby: "Next!"



Spock: "I believe this is what is alluded to in the history tapes as a 'mobile phone'."
Kirk: "Mobile!"
Gary Seven: "You should see the batteries!"



Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Kirk: "Spock Season!"
Spock: "Kirk Season!"
Gus shoots them both...



Miss Blonde: "Is it anything like Music From Middle Earth?"
Nimoy: "No, this is all new."
Miss Brunette: surreptitiously peels off her hobbit feet.

 

"No need to call doctor McCoy Jim. I can get that gerbil out."

 

Spock: "Other than perhaps an afro, I believe this screencap is impossible to photomanipulate."







<Spock casually reaches back, opens jewelry box, takes a few things, and puts them in his pockets.>






Officer Frieberger: "FREEZE!"
<Spock and Kirk comply.>
<Officer Frieberger shoots Spock six times.>





Nimoy: "I'm more popular than Jesus."




Spock: "I apologize for the erection, Captain."

 

Isis: "Don't egg them on, hairless one."

 

It was only when he noticed the giant studded nipple tassle mounted in the corner that Spock realized Mr. Seven was a man not to be trifled with.

 

On Vulcans, they're alive, with six inch fangs...

 

Two furry cats? Definitely bi-fur-cat-ed.

 

Gary 7: "I'm sorry but it's browns and orange for now. We'll work avacado into the nation's decor around '72."

 

Spock: "I submit, gentlemen, that all pointy-eared creatures are superior."

McCoy: "Spock, earlier today I saw that cat eat its own shit."

Spock: "We may fancy the feces, but all pointy-eared's are nevertheless superior."