Agreed. A good friend doesn't stand by and do nothing. They can be honest with you and tell you to shape up though, while offering support. Doing nothing is so cold. Unless it's a hopeless case and there's nothing to be done.
CONFESSIONAL thread (ANONYMOUS so tell us the juicy stuff!)
- Thread starter Holdfast
- Start date
What's the gender ratio?Just to say, I've had a couple of people register names with me; no matches yet. This should be fun. Do join in if you have a secret crush.
Only two people have registered names so far, so it's 50:50 right now.
Feel free to inform me if some lovely lady mentions me
NO!
That's not how it will work. NO freebies!
YOU have to tell me the ones you're interested in. If your name appears on THEIR list, and their name appears on yours, only then will I complete the Cupid Escrow and I'll tell both of you of your mutual interest.
If enough people register names with me, I will post an anonymised list of people who are on anybody's lists, to give encouragement to people to send more names to me. Actually, if the list gets long, I'll probably spin this aspect of the Confessional Thread out into a separate thread, to keep the Confessionals separate from the Cupid Escrow Service.
EDIT - actually, I might just create that spin-off thread right now.
Would any female with a pulse count as a list? I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for a friend... yeah, that's right, a friend...NO!
That's not how it will work. NO freebies!
YOU have to tell me the ones you're interested in. If your name appears on THEIR list, and their name appears on yours, only then will I complete the Cupid Escrow and I'll tell both of you of your mutual interest.
If enough people register names with me, I will post an anonymised list of people who are on anybody's lists, to give encouragement to people to send more names to me. Actually, if the list gets long, I'll probably spin this aspect of the Confessional Thread out into a separate thread, to keep the Confessionals separate from the Cupid Escrow Service.
A simple common "no" would have done. There's goes the chance of me asking you for fashion advice for tommorow yearly fashion shopping spree! Be very afraid of the picture threadFeel free to inform me if some lovely lady mentions me
NO!
That's not how it will work. NO freebies!
YOU have to tell me the ones you're interested in. If your name appears on THEIR list, and their name appears on yours, only then will I complete the Cupid Escrow and I'll tell both of you of your mutual interest.
If enough people register names with me, I will post an anonymised list of people who are on anybody's lists, to give encouragement to people to send more names to me. Actually, if the list gets long, I'll probably spin this aspect of the Confessional Thread out into a separate thread, to keep the Confessionals separate from the Cupid Escrow Service.
EDIT - actually, I might just create that spin-off thread right now.
In any case I think any list of mine would be embarrasingly long or short
Heh, I think you just want someone to push you around... You know you love it.Would any female with a pulse count as a list? I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for a friend... yeah, that's right, a friend...NO!
That's not how it will work. NO freebies!
YOU have to tell me the ones you're interested in. If your name appears on THEIR list, and their name appears on yours, only then will I complete the Cupid Escrow and I'll tell both of you of your mutual interest.
If enough people register names with me, I will post an anonymised list of people who are on anybody's lists, to give encouragement to people to send more names to me. Actually, if the list gets long, I'll probably spin this aspect of the Confessional Thread out into a separate thread, to keep the Confessionals separate from the Cupid Escrow Service.
In any case I think any list of mine would be embarrasingly long or short
Send it to me either way!
The Cupid Escrow Service is now up & running!
I am, of course, still accepting anonymised confessions for this thread too.
Yeah, wheelchair pushing experience would be a plus...Heh, I think you just want someone to push you around... You know you love it.Would any female with a pulse count as a list? I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for a friend... yeah, that's right, a friend...NO!
That's not how it will work. NO freebies!
YOU have to tell me the ones you're interested in. If your name appears on THEIR list, and their name appears on yours, only then will I complete the Cupid Escrow and I'll tell both of you of your mutual interest.
If enough people register names with me, I will post an anonymised list of people who are on anybody's lists, to give encouragement to people to send more names to me. Actually, if the list gets long, I'll probably spin this aspect of the Confessional Thread out into a separate thread, to keep the Confessionals separate from the Cupid Escrow Service.
I know I said to let them hit bottom but I never said to just leave them there. (I apologize. I know I wasn't clear on that point.) That would just be cruel, not only to them but to yourself. I was thinking more on the lines of "shaking the tree" but not "cutting the tree down", like a wake-up call.
For example, I have a friend who is borderline alcoholic. I have known him for almost fifteen years and I love him with all my heart and soul. I would do anything for him (and have). But with this I know (much to my regret) I can not save him. He has to decide to do this for himself. And six months ago I realized the more I helped him the less accountability he had for the problem and the bigger mess he became. So I have stopped pulling his ass out of the fire. I still watch out for him, support him as much as possible and try to be as positive as I can. I will also be there when he is ready to get help. But he is on his own now. And let me tell you, this has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I want/need to go rushing in like a knight in shining armor but I know it is for the best. No one can do this for him except him. (And things are getting better. He is finally taking charge.)
Hopefully that made better sense than my last post.
It makes perfect sense. Often, as much as we want to help someone, it's just not possible. They need to get professional help of some kind. And therefore, the best thing we can do is convince them to get that help if we can.
Makes sense to me, but it also tells me that you are a fantastic friend to have.
I guess I have another confession. At some point I will need a heart/lung transplant. I was told I wouldn't live past 18 but I'm still here. I sometimes wonder when it gets to the point at which I'll need the transplant if I'd accept it. Not because I'm suicidal and want to die, but because I feel I may be taking the chance of someone more deserving.
By which I mean I am not married or involved with anyone, have no kids/dependants, and I think surely there are whole families out there who would benefit from their spouse/parent getting the transplant rather than me.
I know it's a fairly daft way to think, and probably when it comes down to it actually being my life at stake I would jump at the chance, but it is something that I do think about.
By which I mean I am not married or involved with anyone, have no kids/dependants, and I think surely there are whole families out there who would benefit from their spouse/parent getting the transplant rather than me.
I know it's a fairly daft way to think, and probably when it comes down to it actually being my life at stake I would jump at the chance, but it is something that I do think about.
Save your life when you need to and if you have the chance. Your life is just as valuable as anybody else's. It's certainly to your credit that you would think this way, though.
Yeah, I didn't mean that to sound like I didn't think I deserved to live, just that knowing how long it can take for matches to come up sometimes I'd feel like someone else could be missing their chance.
I'm also glad you are still here.
So that settles it, I have to take it, because the TrekBBS would miss me.Bob, we'd miss you. So you better damn well take the transplant if the time comes.
^ Yes we would. 
Go for it. Every life is precious.
Get your friend to go see a doctor and go for ADHD testing.
My husband was recently diagnosed and is now on medication and it has turned his life around. Before he, like your friend, was great at starting projects, full of ideas, but couldn't finish anything and it made him so frustrated. But he couldn't work out why he didn't finish. Everyone says "just be more organised" but if you've got ADHD that's an alien concept, it really does not compute with your brain.
Now he's on the medication, he's focusing on his projects- he's recording his own music, he's doing DIY around the house (used to be he'd promise to do it but it would never get done) and he's focusing at work. It's also helping him socially in that his brain is now able to focus more on other people. It's odd the many ways ADHD impacts your behaviour.
A side-effect of the medicine is loss of appetite - so that's helping too
Whoever you are, if you want more information - PM me. I'll keep it confidential.
Bob if you don't get that transplant I'll have to kill someone and take it from them to give it to you. Would you want that?
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