All that remains of the old friend are the memories. There will be no new experiences. There can be new experiences, new stories, with this "new" Star Trek - the new versions of the characters that haven't been through all the things we remember, but never again will we have new experiences with the prime universe characters.
I understand what you're saying, they could've told a story about Kirk and the others in the "prime" universe. But they didn't. Those characters lived out their lives and the events of that universe led to the new one. The prime universe existed as it did and everything in that universe led up to the moment Nero (and Spock) get thrown into that black hole. There is no time paradox or anything like that going on here.
The thing to remember here is Orci and Kurtzman looked at time travel in a different way than Trek typically has. Orci in his (now famous?) interview about quantum physics tried to explain it. Nero being thrown back in time didn't change anything, it created a new thing. Those most affected by what happened will have the most different lives from the prime timeline (or any other timeline not contaminated by Nero). Nero and Spock are trapped in this timeline. Even if they go back to the 24th century, it would be the 24th century of this timeline, not the prime one.
The odd thing is this "multidimensional" theory of timelines and universes and such has a growing number of critics in physics these days. Something about how a theory of infinite timelines with infinite possibilities with supposed answers for everything raises questions about its falsifiability. In other words, the theory is untestable. Or, as one put it, a theory that answers everything answers nothing. That's the best I grasped it (and can remember) listening to some physicists on NPR a few days back.
Well, there's a few ideas about time travel that they could have used. There's a great physics section on arXiv with a lot of time travel stuff, but basically, there's the many-worlds theory, which this film used to explain how everything in the prime universe isn't affected by the changes caused by Nero. That's one way of avoiding a paradox - the other is using something called the Novikov self-consistency principle which can be used to deal with things like this (and could in theory be used to match up this universe and the "prime" universe should it be so desired).
Basically, Nero's changes merely altered the way events occured, but didn't actually disrupt the flow of the universe enough to consider a paradox. For instance "Amok Time" still occurs, but this time on New Vulcan, and other Vulcan based stories can be moved to this new planet. The Dominion still exists in the Gamma Quadrant, and Voyager can still get sent to the Delta Quadrant, and (sigh) Nemesis can still occur, albeit with slight alterations to backstory. Plus, hopefully, Generations, Plato's Stepchildren and Spock's Brain all get invalidated too...
Basically, the time travel stuff has multiple ways of preserving the overall continuity of the universe, and the way it's been done ensures that there's quite a few ways to get out of future story problems while staying true to the overall mythos.
Actually, come to think of it, we've been through this before - First Contact had the Borg disrupting the original events that led to Zefram Cochrane's warp flight, thus causing the Enterprise to go back to a different universe than the one it came from. It shunted us into a new universe where Starfleet had knowledge of the Borg before Q Who? and thus was different to the original universe where that episode was the first encounter. Did anyone complain about that back then?
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