Two things:
1. Belated welcome a'board!

'tis a fun place, here!
2. What you bring up is part of the fun of the various Trek incarnations; each commander acts a little differently and, depending on which century (23rd vs 24th for example), there may be differences in leadership ideas. Kirk > Picard IMHO*, but both have their moments of rumination and, indeed, there's one scene (Season 2 or 3) where Wesley tells someone that Picard will listen, but once he states and order it must be obeyed. I think it was "A Matter of Honor" (season 2) It's basically TNG's long-winded version of "The Corbomite Maneuver" where Kirk reminds Bailey that the ship's not a democracy once he's given an order and, technically, Kirk wasn't asking for opinions in that particular scene either, hehe!
* Bonus: Sisko > all of them