• Welcome! The TrekBBS is the number one place to chat about Star Trek with like-minded fans.
    If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

Ocampa (Kes) ideas

Most of romances I write are really just "fixing up" things that were messed up by canon writers. Not only Star Trek ones. And Kes often helps me (in - universe). As are a few other characters.

Ocampa for Galactic Civilizations lII (this series of games is really good, and old) can be find if you search "Ocampa Alliance" on Steam.

Thank you for your response. Do you have any ideas? And would you be willing to comment on ideas I have?
Right now I don't have any specific ideas for the Ocampa species. But I will think about it and see if I can come up with something interesting.

As for commenting on other peoples writing and ideas, I seldom do that because different people have different ideas and style of writing.

The only time I do comment is when characters are destroyed which is something I dislike, like when well known Star Trek characters I like are destroyed and killed off in books or so. There have been some occasions in recent time when that have happened.
 
Games? Did someone say games? :)

Description in manual:
"When you choose Ocampa for your character, you'll start out in either a subterranean sealed environment, or a space station, both tightly controlled environments. Ocampans have no access to space technology, though it is possible to escape your initial environment and become a character on a space ship. Ocampa mature rapidly, but have short lifespans (-5 modifier on LIF), that may even be cut down further by unexpected 'evolution' around halfway your expected life span. Female Ocampans can only bear one child (-6 on FERT). Ocampans have great potential for psychic development (+7 modifier on PSY) but start out undeveloped. Accepting random events and side tasks greatly increase the probability of rapid development in this area.

Also, beware for creepy 40-year-somethings in gaudy outfits that try to date you when you're young or alien warlords that take over your body."

Something like this?
 
About the game: Not exactly. In this mod, Ocampa used the knowledge of the Caretaker to drive the Kazon off their planet and used a few ship they commanderred to go into orbit and build a shipyard there and three colony ships. This is space 4X game, so this is how they start. But there are aliens around, much of them hostile.

The knowledge the Caretaker gave them (thanks Lynx for bringing it up) give them a research bonus and knowledge of the locations of other civilization's homeworlds. They are also Hopeful, so they have better morale. But they have heavy population growth penalty.

Lynx, I know that everyone have their own ideas. But I have a bad experience of writing things on another forum and getting no (or very little) response, so I am pretty sensitive on this point and I want people to reacts. And, I do not want to destroy any characters, so you (and others) can warn me if something goes this way (because I did damage some of my original characters a few times. Mostly managed to fix them but still.)
 
Also, if someone is interested in the game series I was talking about, I am also doing a similar project there (and it is going much worse than this one). It can be find here:


Be warned, through (Lynx especially) that this is darker than this one (although not so dark as many other things from today. For example darkness there is not really human's fault. They had no way of knowing that one alien species they gave hyperdrive to are slave - based cowardly conquest - thirsty species. Especially since they propaganda was really good. And they are laughably evil. And somewhat similar to the antagonisic species from Lynx's first story. Just in somewhat better geopolitical position.) But I could use some help there as well.
 
Description in manual:
"When you choose Ocampa for your character, you'll start out in either a subterranean sealed environment, or a space station, both tightly controlled environments. Ocampans have no access to space technology, though it is possible to escape your initial environment and become a character on a space ship. Ocampa mature rapidly, but have short lifespans (-5 modifier on LIF), that may even be cut down further by unexpected 'evolution' around halfway your expected life span. Female Ocampans can only bear one child (-6 on FERT). Ocampans have great potential for psychic development (+7 modifier on PSY) but start out undeveloped. Accepting random events and side tasks greatly increase the probability of rapid development in this area.

Also, beware for creepy 40-year-somethings in gaudy outfits that try to date you when you're young or alien warlords that take over your body."

Something like this?
You forgot to mention this:
Beware for The Kazon who want to enslave you, The Vidiians who want to harvest your bodyparts and The Evil Producers who want to turn you first into an evil witch, then into a pathetic wreck and then kill you.
:D
 
You forgot to mention this:
Beware for The Kazon who want to enslave you, The Vidiians who want to harvest your bodyparts and The Evil Producers who want to turn you first into an evil witch, then into a pathetic wreck and then kill you.
:D
Well, I wanted to leave a few surprises for the aspiring gamer so as to not spoil the gaming experience ;)
 
That's a good one.

Also, would someone be interested in reviewing the already made part of the fanfic I mentioned before?

Just to be warned, it is pretty long (and still gets longer).
 
You forgot to mention this:
Beware for The Kazon who want to enslave you, The Vidiians who want to harvest your bodyparts and The Evil Producers who want to turn you first into an evil witch, then into a pathetic wreck and then kill you.
:D


Well, Kazon enslavement and Vidiian organ processing is nothing compared to the Drengin Empire. They can do both such things, more efficiently and less pleasantly. But, as for evil producers, the only solution is fanfiction and 4X games where you can create your own stories and your own endings.

Also, one of the reasons I am writing this is my refusal to believe that, even in timelines where "that season 6 episode" was real, these events were final events of Kes (and there was much more going on there than it appears. This is my explanation. If there are any inconsistencies, it is because I never watched that episode)?
 
Well, Kazon enslavement and Vidiian organ processing is nothing compared to the Drengin Empire. They can do both such things, more efficiently and less pleasantly. But, as for evil producers, the only solution is fanfiction and 4X games where you can create your own stories and your own endings.

Also, one of the reasons I am writing this is my refusal to believe that, even in timelines where "that season 6 episode" was real, these events were final events of Kes (and there was much more going on there than it appears. This is my explanation. If there are any inconsistencies, it is because I never watched that episode)?
Be happy for that.

As for writing, it took me five minutes to correct the damage to the character which was made in The Gift and one minute to correct the damage which was made in That season six episode. :techman:

I've also corrected the damage which was made to another of My Star Trek favorite, the Klingon Chancellor Gowron who so sadly was wasted in the last season of DS9. :techman:

The Drenging Empire? I've never heard of that.

Edit: I did a quick check. They don't seem to be particularily nice. Kes should stay away from them!
 
As far as I can tell, Kes never met the Drengin (but she heard of them from people who did, like Tandis the Arnor). Generally, you should stay away from them unless you have a ship that can easy defeat them. Like an Arnorian Battle Cruiser or the T.A.S. Crusader. Throught at least they don't want to kill everyone around them.

Well, I am sticking to principle that not all members of one species are evil. True, some have nasty instincts, but everyone can overcome them. And even Drengin's robotic "friends", the Yor, can change.
 
Yes, I don't have "edit" button now. It surprised me.

I think Kes recovered rather quickly from her enslavement by the Kazon. Then again, she is Kes, and she is surprisingly strong and enduring. She didn't even hold a grudge against the Kazon (not that she interacted much with them afterward).

The "man" who was supposedly in love with her "sometimes" started a romantic relationship with a foxy vivisectionist from a species that began a series of unfortunate events which cost Kes a lung.
 
Be happy for that.

As for writing, it took me five minutes to correct the damage to the character which was made in The Gift and one minute to correct the damage which was made in That season six episode. :techman:


As of Kes's powers, I especially liked her ability to block / deflect abilities of other beings, as shown in "Persistence of Vision". Telekinesis was also nice, but rather inconvenient in Star Trek storytelling (makes solving some problems quite too easy).
 
Since we're actually at it, I must admit that those in charge of Voyager messed up the species.
No shit.

If it takes two to reproduce, and the female of the species can only get pregnant once, and multiple births (not just twins, or triplets, but veritable litters) aren't the norm, then the species would die out very quickly.

On the other hand, Kes was portrayed as shockingly intelligent, with the emotional maturity of a twenty-something, so an advanced culture is not impossible. And we don't know how long an Ocampan year is, anyway. And there were some hints that what happened naturally to 9-year-old Ocampa was something other than death. Sort of the same way we found out that the Kelpien Vahar'ai isn't the onset of senility, but of adulthood.
 
My current working theory is that something happened to the Ocampa that made them this way. That how they are now is not a product of natural evolution. And, of course l, that they actually have many children from Elogium, just maybe those with special gifts (like Kes) have only one child. Would also explain why there is not too many of them.

Anyway, I think I would share a bit of my fanfiction I am writing right now. It contains a bit of "Kes wisdom" of looking at things from a different perspective (thanks Lynx for pointing that out).

-Do you have any ideas on how to make her more obedient? - the Orion said.
-Maybe - Kes said. - Try to be a bit gentler with them. Less rough. Apply less punishment.
-But it sounds ridiculous! - the Orion said.
-And you sound like a Drengin! - Kes said
 
No shit.

If it takes two to reproduce, and the female of the species can only get pregnant once, and multiple births (not just twins, or triplets, but veritable litters) aren't the norm, then the species would die out very quickly.

On the other hand, Kes was portrayed as shockingly intelligent, with the emotional maturity of a twenty-something, so an advanced culture is not impossible. And we don't know how long an Ocampan year is, anyway. And there were some hints that what happened naturally to 9-year-old Ocampa was something other than death. Sort of the same way we found out that the Kelpien Vahar'ai isn't the onset of senility, but of adulthood.


Well, I created this thread exactly to collect ideas on these kinds of things before writing a detailed backstory for the Ocampa
 
Well, I created this thread exactly to collect ideas on these kinds of things before writing a detailed backstory for the Ocampa
Ok. But see the first post of the TrekLit "Read This First": if you have any intention of even non-profit publication of this backstory document (or submitting it for any sort of academic credit), you'd be opening yourself up to lawsuits (or anything from a failing grade to an expulsion, in the case of academic credit) if you use any ideas brought up here without permission or acknowledgment.
 
As I already wrote in my first post, I have ever intention of giving full acknowledgment of any contribution given to this project, unless the contributor wishes otherwise. I would be willing to give each part of the document for review (and possible discission) before any publication, before I ever decide to do it. I do not want to take credit for what I didn't do. I want it to be a community project, not personal project (otherwise, I would just write it and maybe ask AI for ideas).
 
Of course, any actual discussion, once I start writing, will take place on another thread in fanfiction section (that I intend to link here, if that's possible). I still must complete a few other things first, mainly related to my original fictional elements and Galactic Civilizations universe (Stardock is much friendlier, nobody there ever complained and these who responded actually encouraged me).
 
I just want to inform you, I started a Galactic Civilizations thread here:


Everyone is invited to go there.
 
If you are not already a member then please register an account and join in the discussion!

Sign up / Register


Back
Top