Look, I’m sorry, but this is *exhausting*. It’s hijinks, meant to play on the audience’s knowledge of Vulcan culture (which, it is important to note, does not exist).
Trek, despite our high minded notions as fans was never nuanced high level sociology, even at its best when examining our own culture. Real, actual sociology and cultural anthropology would be boring as hell in a show like trek and we’d be furious to have 1 or more of 10 episodes spent on it.
It’s hijinks. We’re supposed to smile or laugh at it. Which I did, because the cast was great in it.